Anger at my mom

[DarcyWillow]

What should I do? I was sexually assulted this year, and my mom keeps telling everyone! I just want it to be a private issue. I am sitting in the living room, and my aunts are staying with us. I hear my mom telling my aunts and my brothers that I was assulted (they are in the next room). I don't understand why she doesn't see that this is a private issue, and it is for noone to tell except me.

Lord, give me patience.

 

[ChristInAction]

that really sucks hun. my mum still doesnt know about what happened to me.
*snuggles*
have you tryed to tell her how you feel? that you dont want everyone to know, its your hurt not hers & to please stop. (if it doesnt start a fight, maybe add in; its not her right to tell anyone ether)
maybe give thata go, or try to just kinda ride it out; she'll stop.

are you getting councelling or something for it?
hope so sweetie. its so hard to deal with this stuff by yourself & it doesnt seem like your getting support at home.
if you needa vent or anything, I'm here.
Ally xox

 

[Bamboo_Chicken]

Hey DarcyWillow - welcome to CF!

I'd ask the same thing CIA has said...have you told her you want it to be a private issue and you will tell people if/when you feel like it? I don't know why she's telling people, but I would guess that she's trying to work through it as well. What happened to you is terrible *hug* and maybe she is trying to get her own support - the problem comes when her way of getting support hurts you further.

 

[JCFantasy23]

If it bothers you, I would certainly tell her and be firm. Your recovery is the most important at this time. God be with you

 

[ForAMomentIWillFly]

Perhaps it's the only way she knows how to deal with it? I am sorry.

 

[TertiusC]

That might be true ForAMoment.

But then she is putting her own healing at a higher priority that her daughter's. And that is not the only way to get healing. That isn't even a good way of getting healing.

There is probably a reason that she does do it, and it is part of what she needs, but it's the wrong way of trying to solve the problem.

 

[Angeldove97]

I'm very sorry your Mom is doing this. I haven't told my family about what happened to me--- and honestly I don't think I will ever tell them, besides my Sister who I'm very close to. I'm also very careful with what I tell my Mom because she has the same habit of telling everybody after that.

If you haven't told your Mom that she needs to stop telling YOUR business to everybody, then I would highly advise you doing so. I would also mention to her that if she won't stop telling people because of this incident, you have seen how she would react to a situation and will no longer tell her what's going on with you (even if you two live in the same house).

A friend of mine knew about what happened to me... she, for some reason, decided to tell her ex-boyfriend, who later told me he knew (because of her). I no longer ever trusted her again after that and promptly cut off my friendship with her. This may be rather difficult to do since it's your Mom in your situation--- but even Mom's have to earn respect from their adult Daughters.

 

[EbonNelumbo]

I don't have much to offer. You have my prayers, and you have a hug

 

[Carolyn H]

Praying your Mom understands how you feel about this all!!! God bless you, Sis...Hope you are able to talk to someone about this. My thoughts and prayers are with you!!!!