And Crying again...

[Angeleyes7715]

It's not getting better and I try again everyday. I'm sitting in my car crying. Just got cussed out by two people today during driving and so I yelled back at them.
My bf was annoyed at me about something too. I'm sure I annoy him cause I obsessively post on here and I look up ways to fix my anxietuly and depression.

He just says stuff like calm down or just learn how to deal with stress and theres nothing to cry about why are you even crying as if it's possible to not cry or nreak down.

I have to work at 2pm today it's 12 so I have some time to try to call down, right now I'm just trying to not hyperventile and go into a panic attack. I just don't want to deal with people today I feel like I'm gonna cry every second.


I'm tired of this everyday! Im sure you can see why I'm suicidal by now. Every single day my life is a nightmare I'm on here constantly with problems.

It's literally not possible for me too make it in this life with depression anxiety OCD poverty and physical health issues.

 

[Southernscotty]

I am praying that God sends His calming peace to you. May He still the storm and quiet the winds of distress in your life. Breath deeply let it out slow..

 

[Angeleyes7715]

Calling crisis chat again cause trying to avoid a panic attack. Going back and forth with auicisui thoughts because I feel like people don't have time to deal with my mental problems and I don't know how to fix them so I'm just causing problems. At the same time part of me feels like there might be some way to fix things but then again not possible.

My counselor just called right when I was crying lol and said I missed my appointment today. I totally forgot and was trying to help my bf do something. I liked and told my counselor I was fine...

I feel so hopeless though.

 

[Southernscotty]

Calling crisis chat again cause trying to avoid a panic attack. Going back and forth with auicisui thoughts because I feel like people don't have time to deal with my mental problems and I don't know how to fix them so I'm just causing problems. At the same time part of me feels like there might be some way to fix things but then again not possible.

My counselor just called right when I was crying lol and said I missed my appointment today. I totally forgot and was trying to help my bf do something. I liked and told my counselor I was fine...

I feel so hopeless though.

Just feelings and they will pass, Breath and know that you can do all things through God who strengthens you :] You are a child of the King and what a honor of a place to be :]
No weapon formed against you shall prosper!!!

 

[vinsight4u]

/nvm

 

[Angeleyes7715]

My bf does help when he's not mad and he's working rn.he works long hours as a mechanic. I don't really feel like he gets why I am like this. I feel like he thinks that I just need to toughen up kind of thing cause he is able to do that. I feel bad and feel so annoying and wish I wasn't sad and anxious all the time. I feel like I'm a headcase.

I've been through a lot too and I guess I used to just work harder or tell myself toughen up but as I got older things have gotten less bareable. I started going into hyperventilating attavks more frequently, started crying in public places, started acting out. Things have just gotten worse and worse mental health wise and its like running in circles.


I am so scared I'm just going to lose my ability to cope completely one day and take pills or do something drastic.

 

[Southernscotty]

Please do not go there, That is placing yourself in God's place and this is wrong. He is the Creator and only He decides when it is time for us to depart this earth. You are here for a divine purpose Sister and you need to seek it. Could you be a prayer warrior? could you be a encourager?

 

[com7fy8]

Before I offer anything, please consider that I don't know what to do. I need to do what you need to do. We need to simply and purely trust God with this. Admit to Him, however we are not very good at giving it to God. Our Heavenly Father is the One and only who is able to take care of us >

"casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." (1 Peter 5:7)

I feel like I'm a headcase.

Possibly, you have not gotten to know very many people, if you think you being a head case makes you different than a lot of us! We all need to have the mind of Jesus, and this means all of us have needed a major make-over of our minds and a total personality transplant so we are "gentle and lowly in heart" like Jesus, "and you will find rest for your souls." See Matthew 11:28-30, and please note how Jesus calls this to "all" who are having deep problems > so, this has meant every one of us.

I've been through a lot too and I guess I used to just work harder or tell myself toughen up but as I got older things have gotten less bareable.

Jesus is able to make us bear things. You might consider how our Apostle Paul had that "thorn in the flesh" "thing". He was begging Jesus to take it away, but Jesus was not about to give Paul a miracle of convenience; Paul needed to learn to stay and pray and obey in God's grace. And then he could go through anything and take "pleasure" in his troubles which were for Jesus > 2 Corinthians 12:7-15.

But in his own ego . . . uh-oh!

I am so scared I'm just going to lose my ability to cope completely one day and take pills or do something drastic.

All of us need to totally depend on God and His grace; or, when we fail, we get a taste of how selfish stuff can break us down; and if we have experienced how we can be, in God's love, we get homesick when we get away.

He is the Creator and only He decides when it is time for us to depart this earth.

God is our Good Judge, to decide what to do with each of us when we fail. So, it is good to trust Him to decide what He pleases to do with us when we mess up and break down. He is almighty so He is easily able to take care of any problem in us.

 

[Jeshu]

Calling crisis chat again cause trying to avoid a panic attack. Going back and forth with auicisui thoughts because I feel like people don't have time to deal with my mental problems and I don't know how to fix them so I'm just causing problems. At the same time part of me feels like there might be some way to fix things but then again not possible.

My counselor just called right when I was crying lol and said I missed my appointment today. I totally forgot and was trying to help my bf do something. I liked and told my counselor I was fine...

I feel so hopeless though.

Feeling hopeless is part of depression yet not to be believed or blindly followed but resisted to the max. God's Word says that faith, love and hope always remain, so clearly hopeless thoughts contradict Scripture and therefore our faith in God. For with God we have always hope for better.

One of the biggest lesson you can learn is to unmask the lies from the truth in your depressed mind for it are the negative thoughts patterns depression creates that do so much damage when believed.

Put faith in God's love over your life and before you know you will have hope for better. When we are in God's loving truth then even depression can't touch us that is why the battle down on this earth is to seek after His truth and to remain in His truth.

The truth is depression is an illness and effects our thoughts and feelings in a negative way. The truth is however that with God we can combat our depression and become stronger than it. This is where you want to be sis. In the arms of Jesus safe and sound all the days of your life. He is an awesome Friend, Brother, and God to have at your side.

Peace

Matthew 11:28-30
‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.’

 

[ImAllLikeOkWaitWat]

One thing that probably would help you destress is to spend a good amount of time each day in silence. There are numerous health benefits to staying in silence. Heres a link about it. We are overstimulated each day because of our phones and computers and music etc that we don't give our brain a chance to just rest. Silence will do that.
These Things Happen When You Spend Two Hours In Silence Every Day

 

[Celticroots]

Why did you lie to your therapist? They can't help you if you aren't honest.

 

[Angeleyes7715]

Why did you lie to your therapist? They can't help you if you aren't honest.

B/c he called cause I missed an appointment I didn't want to bother him about my crying at the time (probably my social anxiety stuff) my bf said the same thing lol,he said why wouldn't u tell him. I was too embarrassed to say anything at the moment.