An Atheist's Position

[Wedjat]

I suppose it depends on the priest.Still doesn't look entirely promising though.

If difficulties arise, it is the pastoral duty of the priest to raise questions and initiate a frank discussion with the couple. He would use the same logic as any other situation in life where the faith of a Catholic could be in jeopardy.

I think my case would fall under putting her faith in jeopardy and I'm not sure how well I would do in this interview. I wouldn't lie, and I don't exactly hold the Catholic church as an institution in high regard.

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

I suppose it depends on the priest.Still doesn't look entirely promising though.

I think my case would fall under putting her faith in jeopardy and I'm not sure how well I would do in this interview. I wouldn't lie, and I don't exactly hold the Catholic church as an institution in high regard.

You mentioned in your first post that your girlfriend was "very Catholic". I took that to mean that her faith and belief in God is very important to her.

Going on that assumption, for her to be joined in marriage with someone who questions the institution that she is a member of, plus someone who doesn't even accept God exists will - overtime - be a burden to her. It is a very lonely road to walk for a believer....as well as it being a lonely walk for the non-believer too.

I've heard of similar things with family members on my mother's side who were Catholic. They all married fellow Catholics - they wouldn't even entertain other Christian groups let alone an atheist. She will always be at odds with her family and church.

For both your sakes, I too would advise against you both ending up getting married - whilst it may seem like a nice thing to do now, it is a lot of hard work and you both need to be spiritually pulling in the same direction when things get rough throughout married life.

I realise that this may not be perhaps the most ideal thing to hear but I'd also want you to consider all bases before making such a big decision.

 

[Mayzoo]

I want a couple children, she wants a lot.
Your last post sent me on a Google search on what is apparently called "disparity of cult", essentially we would need express permission to marry, so if the issue did actually arise, I would have to talk with her priest regardless. I don't see how that would work out well.

If she is "practicing" or Orthodox Catholic you need to have a serious and honest discussion about children now. She would likely not be "allowed" by her church (they consider all bc but NFP a sin if I am not mistaken) to take or use any form of birth control. All control of how many children a Catholic has is left up to God--disclaimer: some catholics take bc even though it goes against the general Catholic beliefs, and some Catholics will become sterilized though that also goes against the beliefs....this is a very personal and individual decision that she needs to come to terms with and then you two need to talk about where she stands on the issue. The only variance I have heard to this story is when the couple is split denomination, and the woman is Catholic the man may use condoms/vasectomy as it is not the woman causing the barrier to pregnancy--and even this discussion had disagreements between Catholics on whether this was acceptable or not. It is a very complex issue from what I gather.

My understanding is most Priests will welcome you in for a discussion. You do not have to go talk with her Priest per se to get a few answers. Again, every church has minor variances, but the Catholic faith is probably the most consistent between churches to my knowledge anyway.

This is mostly hearsay, but I have heard for a mixed faith couple to be married in the Catholic church that the non Catholic must agree to raise any children as Catholic. I hope someone who know more about this can verify or correct me if I am wrong. This may be a good question to ask your local Priest if you go speak with one.

 

[Wedjat]

Well I guess none of this matters anymore. I recently found out that she cheated on me...
...we broke up yesterday.

 

[Cute Tink]

Sorry to read that.

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

Well I guess none of this matters anymore. I recently found out that she cheated on me...
...we broke up yesterday.

Sorry to read that too.

 

[Mayzoo]

Sorry to read that

 

[k450ofu3k-gh-5ipe]

Awe sorry to here, man .

Better to know now then later though, right?

 

[TreeHouse]

Condolences friend. I am in similar vein, though it's a denominational fight moreso than a belief v. non thing. However, perhaps this is your chance to give a reflection on what you really want to deal with over the long haul.

 

[Flowerandthevine]

I was reading through this thread and I am sorry to read this.