Aloneness

[Lost Witness]

Isaiah 55:8-9 @VCR-2000

 

[VCR-2000]

Isaiah 55:8-9 @VCR-2000

I am familiar with that passage. It still doesn't cure the frustration. All I can say for right now is that I am not alone but it is a more "suffering in silence" kind of thing as there isn't much helpful social dialog about it.

 

[Jamdoc]

trust me, you're not. There's something like 28% of people between 25 and 34 alone, and still over 20% above that age never married. It will only grow. My health issues would make me undesirable to women to I have simply accepted my fate, hence my choice of celibacy but I hate it as it was not what I wanted. Just the card I was dealt. This community is great though. I feel ya

Same boat, but I have bitterness over the fact that when I do get a new body, it will be "too late" and I just missed out.

 

[VCR-2000]

Same boat, but I have bitterness over the fact that when I do get a new body, it will be "too late" and I just missed out.

That was kind of the point I was getting at with my above post. I still haven't gotten completely over it by the way, and maybe never will during this lifetime. It's one thing to have something you so desire to be delayed but eventually complete it. It's different if it ends up being "too late" and for whatever reason you miss out.

I understand that in Paradise everything will be perfect by definition and you wouldn't "miss out" on anything you thought you wanted on earth, but that doesn't make it any less frustrating down here. I'm now feeling it's more like "you aren't going to get what you want down here and when you get a new body you won't feel like experiencing or wanting it more anyway, so suck it up."

 

[RileyG]

I am patiently waiting to go to heaven. I know I won't be alone there.

 

[bèlla]

In your shoes I'd commit to fasting once per week. Whether it's a meal, day or from sunrise to sunset is your decision. The practice develops stillness and peace. I'd join a prayer group too that met weekly at least and provided an opportunity for conversation. You can find them online.

In time you'll feel lighter and less alone. The extra prayers won't hurt. Groups like that often attract prayer warriors and their labors on your behalf will bless you (and likewise).

Finally, don't neglect your daily bread. You need time in His presence. Daily appointments foster discipline and impact the environment. Heaviness thrives in sorrow.

~bella

 

[bèlla]

Same boat, but I have bitterness over the fact that when I do get a new body, it will be "too late" and I just missed out.

If memory serves infirmity hails from the marine kingdom. The ruling spirit is python. That would be my starting point. Resource wise Prayer Madeuke is phenomenal. He wrote a book on the subject and many others related to warfare. If you're willing to fight I'd consider the courtroom prayer along with the one for chromosomes and genes and address them all.

This is more offensive but if his style isn't to your liking here's another option. She addresses health thoroughly. Given the circumstances I'd opt for the first. Africans are frequently more conversant in spiritual warfare and pray with a ferocity we rarely witness.

Long standing issues and unbridgeable dilemmas frequently have a spiritual component we're oblivious to. That doesn't mean you erred. There's a lot of things that land on our lap through no fault of ours. Especially family. Sometimes were dealing with the aftermath of things that happened long ago.

Whatever the case you'll be bettered through the experience and strengthened. Admittedly I use them all. I'm not on Madeuke's level yet but there's a noticeable difference in my life and spirit because of him. There may be some pushback but keep going. You'll relinquish a lot.

@DragonFox91 and @VCR-2000 may want to consider the same. Long delays in pairing have a spiritual correlation. And if anyone uses pornography or did in the past and have similar challenges the likelihood of spirit marriage is great. They'll block the union or destroy it.

Everything I suggested I've done. In respect to infirmity, I did a three day Esther fast several years ago with my daughter on our family's behalf. When we finished I saw a vision of my aunt. She had a large snake coiled around her chest and she pushed him off. He was dead.

I didn't know what I was seeing at the time but the Lord explained. She had breast cancer and was the lone one who ever did. She's still in remission. I don't claim responsibility but He showed me the root of her ailment. I've seen spirit marriages and children too. It's a powerful weapon against unions and fertility and usually causes barrenness.

Beyond the ones I've shared the other two that interfere with relationships and childbearing are murder and abortion. The blood never stops crying for vindication. All of them flow generationally until someone breaks it. The slogan it runs in families has truth.

If you opt to do it look for patterns. Especially in your family. Similar struggles and vices and pray against them. Thankfully he shows you how to do so and keep them at bay. If you prefer a western source Derek Prince and Frank Hammond are reputable. Pigs in the Parlor is a great read which shouldn't be missed.

God willing, bonds will be broken and the opportunities that evaded you will be no more.

~bella