Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
I’m going to put a few ideas on the table for your consideration.
If your relationship with your family is possible for a short duration; that’s the ideal step. With a caveat. You need a plan before you go there. So it’s clear for both you’re working towards a solution.
The easiest road is school. Most transfer deadlines haven’t occurred. I’d look for places that offer apartments for married students and those with families. Many have childcare and the costs for rent and daycare are added to your term bill. Your financial aid should cover most of it.
You’re eligible for independent status. That will increase your budget. Work study or part-time employment will provide extra income. Look at 4-year schools. You need stability and peace. This is easiest to do when the child is young.
Look at public and private schools. Including Christian ones. You can get the meal plan. That will lower your food costs. And summer classes would enable you to stay there year-round.
I’m recommending this for two reasons. It’s doable and minimizes isolation. You can focus on bettering yourself, raising the child, and healing. You need to be intentional about your major. In your shoes, I’d pursue nursing.
If I recall correctly, you’re a writer. If so, I’d capture my journey as a single mother with a blog. And tell your story. You’ll be surprised how many are going through the same and feel alone. That can develop into something bigger.
I wouldn’t get a place and rough it out. That works when you have a solid support network or the means to cover expenses. I did that and my mother offered to keep my daughter for me to finish school. But leaving her wasn’t an option and I gave up my dream school and eventually the career as well.
God had something else in mind. He worked through my circumstances and used them to strengthen me. He provided the right job, neighborhood, and experiences. But He wasn’t done. It was preparing me for things to come. I didn’t know it then. I couldn’t see this point and nor will you. Not yet.
I gave up Harvard. And He gave me London and Paris in return. I forsook medicine. He provided a business in its place. I expected 100 hour work weeks as a surgeon. But He brought me home and called me to fashion.
Honoring my commitments yielded a harvest I didn’t anticipate. Be faithful in motherhood. The story isn’t over. It’s just beginning. He’s woven His will through everything you’re enduring.
Today seems impossible. But it’s a moment. It doesn’t feel that way right now. All that’s required of you is one thing and one word.
‘Help’ and take His hand.
All things work together for our good. He knows the way forward. Trust Him.
~Bella
You’re welcome. I’m happy to help. Thank you for the update.
When do you finish your program? Biochemistry isn’t easy. You must be very smart.
Apply for subsidized housing too. You’ll have a preference given the situation. There may be site based options and the voucher. Apply for the voucher and take a unit if something comes up. You’ll qualify for energy assistance too through LIHEAP.
It can take time to get an apartment. The earlier you apply the better. If you don’t have contact information mention it when you apply for assistance. They should know.
Check with your church and those in your area that sponsor missionaries. There’s usually someone with extra space or rooms they rent for use when they’re on furlough.
I’m mentioning this because they’re vetted and often do this as a ministry. Companionship came to mind too. These are people who live alone. Usually women. They’re a little older and lonely. You’d be a blessing to one another.
Pray for insight and keep your eyes peeled for unexpected options. And plug into a church with a vibrant children’s ministry. The resources and encouragement make a difference.
MOPS is a great organization. See if there’s a group in your area.
The little one may be a blessing in disguise and the avenue for healing and joy. God uses unlikely situations to make us whole.
Single parenting is manageable with one. But additions are difficult. You desired to marry and I doubt that’s gone away. It’s important you keep that in mind.
Diverse connections are best. Those in your shoes and others in the position you’re seeking. Befriending married women will expand your network and keep you on course.
Keep posted on your progress.
~Bella
