Advice please

[laurabuk]

Hi,

I don't know if this is the place to put this thread but I have asked the people in the single thread too - can anyone who has maybe gone through a similar situation help

Basically I'm looking for some advice for a friend at Uni - A. A was going out with a girl B for two/three years but split with her during last summer. B split with A, and got with another lad two weeks later. In September, A got with girl C who is on the same course, but A ended this relationship two weeks ago due to problems.

I was talking to A last night, and he says that he sort of regrets his time with C (I think this was a rebound relationship) and from what he said, it sounds like he is still deeply in love with B. She is still with the lad she dumped him for. I asked him if he had ever considered praying (we have had several spiritual conversations in the past) and he said that after he split with Bhe prayed for help to get through it, which he did but he doesn't pray now.

Does anyone know of any books I could maybe give him to help with the situation, and any advice I can give to A. . Also, I'm a girl in a relationship with another guy and whilst my b/f is supportive I'm worried that any feelings A has for B might be displaced onto me - how can I help him get through these problems and witness to him whilst keeping myself separate emotionally??

Advice and prayers would be great

Laura

 

[BigNorsk]

How to get over being dumped

 

[Jadiell]

BigNorsk gave you something to pass on to your friend, I'll approach the other bit of your problem...

Trying to witness one to one to members of the opposite sex is always a minefield, and is even more so when there is so much emotion around. Is there anyone else you can get involved? Like your boyfriend? Your friend would probably be better discussing these kinds of things with another guy anyway, so if you can find a Christian guy you can introduce him to, that would be the best way to manage it.

Also, it might be a good opportunity to invite him along to church/university christian group/bible study/etc. He may have a lot of time on his hands, and just want to get out, so perhaps would be more open to it then usual. Also it will give him the chance to meet new people (like Christian guys!)

If my suggestions above are not practical, then I'd settle for just being really careful. Try and make it as clear as possible what the parameters of your relationship are - don't give any signals which could be interpreted as something else. Make sure your boyfriend knows what's going on and keep him updated. Try and spend time with your friend in more of a group setting. I realise you'll want to talk to him about stuff which he isn't going to want to talk about in front of lots of people, but it is possible to have one to one chats, even when you are part of group.

It's an opportunity to be Jesus to him, but pray lots and be wise!