Advice for moving out of parents' house?

[CCinoklahoma87]

Greetings everyone

I'm wondering if anyone has some advice for a young adult moving out of the house for the first time.
I've been living with my parents and siblings all of my life, was homeschooled, never had a job..(and can't find one or get hired anywhere in the town i'm living) and currently the only thing i am doing is taking computer programming distance learning courses through an online college, which should be finished by January. One thing the Lord has been showing me is maybe I am not meant to have permanent residence in this town, and maybe a future lies ahead of me in a different locaton. So i've been talking it over with my boyfriend (I had a seperate post on a different area of this subject) and he and his room mate welcome me to their apartment (his roomie broke up with his gf) and now they have 2 spots for ppl, and my bf has reserved one spot for me there and he said he will support me until i get on my feet(find a job etc.) which he can help me with and he also wants to help me get my driver license my 'rents havent taught me to drive yet either but he wants to teach me to do that as well. So anyways it just feels like all this time God was planning for me to relocate due to circumstances made me unable to make any permanent connections/residence here in town and i am still being hindered in doing so, and the strong feeling i get when i pray is that God has a plan for me elsewere. so the conclusion is what is some advice for someone in my situation moving out for the first time..relying only on God and my bf for awhile? I've been praying about it and so far i only am more led to believe this is the path God wants for me. regardless what do y'all think?

 

[explodingboy]

In all honesty.
I think it's a bad move.

Done the whole Gf moves in with myself and room mate, with me paying her share of everything while she looks for a job, and it ended, with her still not having a job up until the point that we broke up.

So until your not relying on your Bf, I wouldn't do it, because he is just that your Bf, not your husband.

 

[SteadFastAlex]

If you are truly truly strong with the Lord then anything is possible but I would be careful with this matter because a lot of things could go wrong. If you do decide to go through with it, I would make sure that its for the right reasons. Don't do it if you just want to move out with your b/f, I've seen the end of that road (not first hand) and its usually because one was forced into it. In the case that I'm refering to, would be pregnancy.

Like I said, be careful and let the Lord guide you with your decision.

 

[believetheunseen]

Hi!
I just wanted to put in my opinion, for what it's worth. Don't move in with your boyfriend. Boyfriend does not equal spouse, and to move in with him is only allowing temptation for sex before marriage (which is a sin, as much as people don't want to believe it. I know I won't be popular for saying that.).
That aside, your boyfriend can be a great help in the moving out process, and it will strengthen your relationship. If he's still interested, have him teach you how to drive, and find a job so you can afford a place of your own.
I'm so happy for you that you are praying for this, and that God is pulling at your heart. I think God will start opening doors for you, so if you keep your eyes open, He will provide an option that is more amazing than what you would have thought yourself.

Good luck!

 

[Alizera]

If you're going to move in with him, I'd really find yourself a job first before moving out. That way you can pull your weight with the bills.

 

[WhiteWillow]

agree ^

 

[CCinoklahoma87]

Thanks for the input everyone!!! Alex and believe, you had some very helpful opinions and advice

We both understand the temptation risk and therefore when we do move in together we have discussed scenarios in where we'd be tempted and ways to avoid them if at all possible, and we plan on buying a few books and things on Godly relationships. He found a couple at his church's library that could be very helpful. anyways thanks alot y'all!

 

[Sketcher]

If you don't have a job, forget it.

You're dating him - forget it for two reasons. One is the temptation factor. Two is if you break up for some reason, you'll still be under the same roof. Not good.

 

[jamesinjax]

Hi!
I just wanted to put in my opinion, for what it's worth. Don't move in with your boyfriend. Boyfriend does not equal spouse, and to move in with him is only allowing temptation for sex before marriage (which is a sin, as much as people don't want to believe it. I know I won't be popular for saying that.).
That aside, your boyfriend can be a great help in the moving out process, and it will strengthen your relationship. If he's still interested, have him teach you how to drive, and find a job so you can afford a place of your own.
I'm so happy for you that you are praying for this, and that God is pulling at your heart. I think God will start opening doors for you, so if you keep your eyes open, He will provide an option that is more amazing than what you would have thought yourself.

Good luck!

Yep I agree with that very much.

 

[CCinoklahoma87]

If you don't have a job, forget it.

You're dating him - forget it for two reasons. One is the temptation factor. Two is if you break up for some reason, you'll still be under the same roof. Not good.

Well in reply to the second reason, it's very very highly unlikely..we are committed fully and entirely..we have made a commitment and promise to stick by eachother and not break up no matter what we will work through whatever may come. Our love is unconditional. However the temptation factor is a good and more serious reason yet we are well aware of that and discussed what we would do if faced with several tempting situations.

 

[Sketcher]

Well in reply to the second reason, it's very very highly unlikely..we are committed fully and entirely..we have made a commitment and promise to stick by eachother and not break up no matter what we will work through whatever may come. Our love is unconditional.

A lot of people say that. And a lot of people break up after all, and it's hell until one of them moves out.

 

[DougyP]

Ix Nay. Don't do it. Bad move.

Move out quick, but be on your own just once in your life. It's fun.

 

[citizenthom]

Other posters have focused on where you'd be living based on your original post. Let me offer some words about the timing of the move:

Independence has to come by increments or it won't come at all. If you've never had a job, that means you've never had a chance to time-manage that job and your other commitments (social, recreational, and of course spiritual). You also haven't had a chance to budget your own money, consider the costs of things, pay bills, and the like. All of those are things you need to be able to do on your own initiative before you're really in a good place to live on your own or with roommates/a partner. If those things aren't automatic, then the added stresses of keeping up a home, paying rent, and dealing with neighbors are going to be quite a lot to adjust to all at once.

All of this is a process. It takes time. That's frustrating, because people used to be able to get it done a lot faster when we could all go get a job at the local factory or mill or whatever. The new economy requires you to get schooling before you get work, and we just have to live with that until/unless it goes back to something more youth-friendly.

You've got parents who are willing to help out. Don't feel ashamed taking advantage of that in this economy. Focus on your education (which appears to be toward something quite marketable, BTW), then on getting a job. Then see if you can move beyond entry-level pay so you can really afford a place of your own. Then start working on moving out and moving to another town with better opportunities.

Good luck!