This is so shameful. I'm disgusted by it. I can't even look at myself in the mirror anymore. Even my few closest friends are fading away. I know this is the worst ever. I'm addicted to entertaining myself, internet surfing, netflix, even reading. I'm in a horrible depression and have had it for many years but never this bad. I heard that in order to really change you should sometimes make a radical step toward God and being healthier. For me i have thought of throwing my computer to the dump. But I have online school and it's not the root of the real problem i know but i'm sure wasting away going nowhere and it's eating me up.
So even being in this forum is technically adding to the addiction to internet. If other people are in this situation, how do you do battle your online addictions but still be a regular poster here?
I have never felt until now have felt so much like i was being led around by an invisible force like a puppet. I'm a slave to myself and desires, not even counting needs and healthy wants
I'm an off and on poster here though i hardly write as you can see in my profile because there's either much i need to say, or it's so cramped up inside, I can't get it out can't find that outlet. I have struggled with an eating disorder. Now that's kicking in as well.I don't even do anything anymore to keep on developing talents and hobbies like I was trying to do before. I just dont' see the point. I'll get better than fall, a little hope than gone. a step forward then 5 back! i hate this!
I've struggled with pride and believing it's the most important thing to be talented. Now i'm sick of all that because it's not truth but a lie from the enemy! I"m not even disciplined to read scripture or pray regularly. i really feel i've lost all zest and energy and the will to live, to keep on going. No, i'm not going to do anything. For one, I"d be in the true hell most likely and two, i'm in touch with someone (counselor)if it gets that bad. i used to get regular counseling but can't afford it now, no insurance. I really don't want to give up but I do. I"m so stuck I can't stand myself
So even being in this forum is technically adding to the addiction to internet. If other people are in this situation, how do you do battle your online addictions but still be a regular poster here?
I have never felt until now have felt so much like i was being led around by an invisible force like a puppet. I'm a slave to myself and desires, not even counting needs and healthy wants
I'm an off and on poster here though i hardly write as you can see in my profile because there's either much i need to say, or it's so cramped up inside, I can't get it out can't find that outlet. I have struggled with an eating disorder. Now that's kicking in as well.I don't even do anything anymore to keep on developing talents and hobbies like I was trying to do before. I just dont' see the point. I'll get better than fall, a little hope than gone. a step forward then 5 back! i hate this!
I've struggled with pride and believing it's the most important thing to be talented. Now i'm sick of all that because it's not truth but a lie from the enemy! I"m not even disciplined to read scripture or pray regularly. i really feel i've lost all zest and energy and the will to live, to keep on going. No, i'm not going to do anything. For one, I"d be in the true hell most likely and two, i'm in touch with someone (counselor)if it gets that bad. i used to get regular counseling but can't afford it now, no insurance. I really don't want to give up but I do. I"m so stuck I can't stand myself
