Abortion, from the father's perspective

Unofficial Reverand Alex

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I went to the March for Life last year, with Indiana's Knights of Columbus. Unfortunately, I was sick the day of the march, but it was still an awesome trip. I heard a lot of the other Knights talking about the march, and watched it on EWTN from my hotel room. One saying that was going around a lot was "Love them both", referring to the baby & mother, advocating against abortion for sake of saving the baby from death and saving the mother from the emotional pain.

I recently posted a thread about Christian Rap, and someone added in a song that really hit the "Love them both" side of abortion, but from the father's perspective.

And I put this thread in a section of CF that's not Christian-exclusive for a reason: I don't want theological discussions about abortion, no Bible verses, nothing like that for this thread. I'm just looking at morality from anyone's perspective.

 

Unofficial Reverand Alex

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SkyWriting

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I'm just looking at morality from anyone's perspective.

It's morally wrong to attempt to interfere. I know a 13 year old who brought her baby to school. Mom carried it for her. So how do we decide the fate of a 13 year old mother who's mother must raise the child? It's wrong for us to decide. Mom's boyfriend went to prison over the babies conception.
 
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Tanj

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PreviouslySeeking...

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Hmm, I've known women who've had abortions for a variety of reasons. I don't know anyone who's suffered lasting trauma over it.

Not being argumentative, but this seems like a minor problem.

Seriously, if you want to make abortion go away - tackle the reasons why women make that choice.
 
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Silmarien

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Women who get an abortion tend to regret it not long after the procedure, sometimes requiring counseling or even committing suicide. Groups like Silent No More have formed to share testimonies of how badly abortion hurts the mothers.
Silent No More Awareness Campaign: Testimony Directory
Abortion and Suicide – AbortionFacts.com

Are there any recent non-partisan statistics about this? The idea that women regret abortions doesn't match up to my experience at all, so I have some difficulty believing that women suffer emotional pain in the absence of underlying moral issues with abortion. The connection to suicide would be troubling, but those studies are 30 years old and the public perception of abortion has changed drastically since then.
 
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OldWiseGuy

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Nithavela

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Sparagmos

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Women who get an abortion tend to regret it not long after the procedure, sometimes requiring counseling or even committing suicide. Groups like Silent No More have formed to share testimonies of how badly abortion hurts the mothers.
Silent No More Awareness Campaign: Testimony Directory
Abortion and Suicide – AbortionFacts.com
I had an abortion and never regretted it. I know MANY other women who have too, none have ever said they regretted it. IMO, it’s the women who are in a culture that denounces abortion who regret it. I can guarantee that the emotional pain of having my family disown me for getting pregnant at 18 would have taken years to recover from.
 
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PreviouslySeeking...

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Here's the thing. The women I know who had abortions, needed them. From women who had their doctors recommend them to mothers (yes women with children) who had them so they could care for the children they already had. They didn't have the time for regret.

This isn't about being a keyboard warrior or a liberal activist. Women have had abortions since the first cunning woman figured out what herbs were natural abortifacients. That is simple fact.

Is it difficult for some? Certainly! The majority? I seriously doubt it, the reasons they choose it are too pressing to allow for it.

If you live in a way contrary to what you believe is good; that will cause you problems.

That said, sin is subjective. Not everyone is interested in being close to the Christian God.
 
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OldWiseGuy

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I had an abortion and never regretted it. I know MANY other women who have too, none have ever said they regretted it. IMO, it’s the women who are in a culture that denounces abortion who regret it. I can guarantee that the emotional pain of having my family disown me for getting pregnant at 18 would have taken years to recover from.

I (subtly) suggested that my sister get an abortion when she became pregnant by the 'wrong' guy. She didn't and the way she managed her life from that point on was a disaster for her and several others. It also led to her physical breakdown that eventually ended her life, after 20 years of severe pain and mental anguish.
 
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Sparagmos

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I (subtly) suggested that my sister get an abortion when she became pregnant by the 'wrong' guy. She didn't and the way she managed her life from that point on was a disaster for her and several others. It also led to her physical breakdown that eventually ended her life, after 20 years of severe pain and mental anguish.
I’m so sorry to hear that. Having a child at the wrong time in your life can certainly make a lot of things worse.
 
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Silmarien

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I had an abortion and never regretted it. I know MANY other women who have too, none have ever said they regretted it. IMO, it’s the women who are in a culture that denounces abortion who regret it.

I think this is actually too simplistic. You do not need to come from a culture that denounces abortion to eventually develop the conviction that abortion is morally inacceptable, that it kills a human being, etc. Occasionally women do switch sides immediately after having an abortion, or after carrying a later pregnancy to term. Or for whatever other reason. (I have never had an abortion to later regret, but my position on the issue has changed, so if I had had one, I would have eventually come to regret it.)

Of course, this doesn't subtract from the fact that women do not automatically regret abortions, and certainly don't need to be infantilized and "protected" from making decisions they might later regret.
 
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Sparagmos

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I think this is actually too simplistic. You do not need to come from a culture that denounces abortion to eventually develop the conviction that abortion is morally inacceptable, that it kills a human being, etc. Occasionally women do switch sides immediately after having an abortion, or after carrying a later pregnancy to term. Or for whatever other reason. (I have never had an abortion to later regret, but my position on the issue has changed, so if I had had one, I would have eventually come to regret it.)

Of course, this doesn't subtract from the fact that women do not automatically regret abortions, and certainly don't need to be infantilized and "protected" from making decisions they might later regret.
I agree, didn’t mean at all that it had to be the culture you came from. Just the culture you are in, including your own convictions.
 
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redleghunter

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And the irony of the pro birthers not caring about the physical pain, or even life, of the mother, continues.

So hard to have any kind of decent conversation in the face of this hypocrisy.

U.S. Has The Worst Rate Of Maternal Deaths In The Developed World

Let me wander off for a second and compare the number of threads on CF complaining about this vs abortion.

---Staff Edit---
Yes child birth can be painful. Your solution to resolve mortality rates is to increase abortions?
 
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redleghunter

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Here's the thing. The women I know who had abortions, needed them. From women who had their doctors recommend them to mothers (yes women with children) who had them so they could care for the children they already had. They didn't have the time for regret.

This isn't about being a keyboard warrior or a liberal activist. Women have had abortions since the first cunning woman figured out what herbs were natural abortifacients. That is simple fact.

Is it difficult for some? Certainly! The majority? I seriously doubt it, the reasons they choose it are too pressing to allow for it.

If you live in a way contrary to what you believe is good; that will cause you problems.

That said, sin is subjective. Not everyone is interested in being close to the Christian God.
Yes it’s a no brainer that women who have elective premeditated abortions obviously don’t care much for what they are carrying. Which is another human being. They already decided their priorities otherwise.
 
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