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What does standing for my spouse mean?
"Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. "I hate divorce." says the Lord God of Israel...." Malachi 2:15-16
Read Matthew 19:3-9. God hates divorce. He created marriage starting with Adam and Eve. "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Genesis 2:18.
Satan is out to steal, kill and destroy our marriages. "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the fullest." John 10:10
Satan has come into your home and is stealing your marriage by deceiving one marriage partner that your marriage is dead. The spouse that is deceives wants out of the marriage and usually has someone else that you may or may not know about. Throughout your marriage you may had "ups and downs" but, "...the enemy, the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." I Peter 4:8
Your spouse has been taken captive by the enemy, they are brainwashed, they are deceived, blinded to knowing the truth. Many people we work with are born-again Christians who were Pastors, Music Directors, Bible Study Teachers, Promise Keepers and active in Church leadership. We are praying that all these spouses, "will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will." 2 Tim 2:26.
"Standing" means not giving up on your spouse regardless of what they may say or do. You are standing and believing for your marriage covenant to be restored.
Read John 10. "My sheep listen to My voice; I know them, and they follow me." The Lord will go after that one lost sheep and leave the 99. Believe in the power of prayer. The Truth will set your spouse free! "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God." Mark 10:27
The affirmation .
I AM STANDING FOR THE HEALING OF MY MARRIAGE! . . . I will not give up, give in, give out or give over 'til that healing takes place. I made a vow, I said the words, I gave the pledge, I gave a ring, I took a ring, I gave myself, I trusted GOD, and said the words, and meant the words...in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in good times and in bad . . . so I am standing NOW, and will not sit down, let down, slow down, calm down, fall down, look down, or be down 'til the breakdown is torn down!
I refuse to put my eyes on outward circumstances, or listen to prophets of doom, or buy into what is trendy, worldly, popular, convenient, easy, quick, thrifty, or advantageous. . Nor will I settle for a cheap imitation of God's real thing, nor will I seek to lower God's standard, twist God's will, re-write God's Word, violate God's covenant, or accept what God hates, namely divorce!
In a world of filth, I will stay pure; surrounded by lies, I will speak the truth; where hopelessness abounds, I will hope in God: where revenge is easier, I will bless instead of curse and where the odds are stacked against me, I will trust in God's faithfulness.
I am a STANDER, and I will not acquiesce, compromise, quarrel or quit . . . I have made the choice, set my face, entered the race, believed the Word, and trusted God for all the outcome.
I will allow neither the reaction of my spouse, nor the urging of my friends, nor the advice of my loved ones, nor economic hardship, nor the prompting of the devil to make me let up, slow up, blow up, or give up 'til my marriage is healed!
Twenty-six tips for a restored Marriage
Now -How do I stand with God for a restored Marriage? Here are ABCs for a healed family. This list is provided, but the real ABCs are found only in Scripture. If you are serious about standing, and I pray you are, you need to look up every scripture referenced here. Mary you memorize and take to heart the Word of God.
A = Always put the full armor of God on yourself, your spouse and children every day so that you can take your stand against the devils tricks. Ephesians 6:10-18
B = Become a student of the word. Your direction, instruction, comfort and hope will NOT come from a person, nor from a ministry, but from God and through His written word, the Bible. You cannot claim the promises if you do not now them, unless you read and study the Bible Psalm 119: 9, 11, 105, 148
C = Each one of us made a commitment when we said, I do on our wedding day. We are standing on our covenant and not a contract that can be broken. May each of us make a commitment every day that for life regardless of our circumstances, for our spouse and marriage. Psalm 37:5, Malachi 2:11-16, Proverbs 16:1-4,7,9
D = We need to always need to know and remember who the enemy is: the devil, Satan. It is not our spouses. 1 Peter 5:8-9. John 10:10, James 4:7-8
E = Envy and jealousy can destroy our marriage restoration. Do not envy or be jealous of anything that is happening at the present time. It is only for a season. God will bless you if you love your spouse unconditionally, as He loves us. Galatians 5:24-26, James 3:13-18, 2 Corinthians 12:20
F = faith is the opposite of fear. We live by faith not by sight. Fear is from the enemy. Face every day with the excited anticipation that the God who created the universe will be right there with you, giving you not mans protection, but Gods. Psalm 27:1, Psalm 34:1-10, Hebrews 11, Matthew 9:27-31, Luke 17:1-6, Psalm 56, Matthew 8:23-26
G = Go to Church. Find that local body of believers where you can grow and serve the Lord. Corinthians 12:24-27, Malachi 3:8-12
H = Pray that each of us will be filled with the Holy Spirit including our spouse, children, loved ones and any other prodigals. We need the Holy Spirit to have power from on high. John 14:25-26, John 16:8,13, Acts 1:4,5,7-8
I = Ignore all of the insults. Become like a Noah, who built an ark for his family and they were saved. Every day you have a choice whether you will build an ark for your family to be saved, regardless of what others might say. 2 Corinthians 12:7-10, 1 Peter 3:8-9, 1 Peter 4:12-14
J = Before we can ever expect marriage restoration, each of us need to repent, confess our sins, asking for forgiveness and become a new creature in Jesus Christ. We must be saved. Many of us may have known the Lord, but did not submit to him first and our spouse second. Ask for forgiveness john 17:3, Romans 10;9. Acts 2:38,39
K = Many marriages are destroyed for lack of knowledge. While we are separated from our spouse, we make every effort to become a student of the word of God and gain wisdom, knowledge and understanding we can all learn much if we will sacrifice our time to learn all we can about Him, about our marriages and how to raise our children. Hosea 4:6, Proverbs 1:7, Proverbs 2:2:1-11, 2 Peter 3:17-18
L = Love of a stander must be unconditional, just as Christ loves each of us. There is no room in standing for a restored marriage for tough love or If you dont do it right, I will do wrong Hosea 2:6-7, 3:1, Matthew 5:39-48, 1 Corinthians 13:5-, Romans 12:9-12
M = God created marriage. It is a covenant and not a contract that cannot be broken. You made a vow to God and God hates divorce and expects us to keep our vows. Genesis 2:18-25, Numbers 30:2, Malachi 2:14-16, Matthew 19:4-9, Ephesians 5:21-33, 1 Corinthians 7:10-11, Ecclesiastes 5:4,5
N = God will provide for your daily needs. Do not worry, just seek Him and He will take care of you and your family. Deuteronomy 28:2-9, Psalm 23:1, Matthew 6:25-34, Philippians 4:19, 2 Corinthians 9:8, 3 John 2
O = Living by faith means obeying Gods word in spite of feelings circumstances or consequences. Obedience and faith are inseperateable. It is living and standing on the promises of God. John 14:15-31, Hebrews 11:8, 1 John 5:2-4, Deuteronomy 11, Nehemiah 1:4-9
P = Prayer is a priority. You must spend time alone with God. There is power in praying. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. James 5:16-13-19, 2 Chronicles 7:14-15, Psalm 145:18, Hebrews 4:16, 1 John 5:14-15, Mark 11:22-25
Q = Regardless of your circumstances you should never quit standing for your covenant marriage. Your standing and praying may make all the difference in the world between your spouses being in heaven or hell for all eternity. Galatians 6:9, Philippians 3:12-14, Luke 18:1-8, 2 Corinthians 4
R = God will be your refuge in times of trouble; He will never leave you or forsake you. Psalm 46, Psalm 18:28-50, Psalm 91, and Psalm 57:1-5
S = Seek the Lord with all your heart. He will direct your steps. If you do it your way, you will never find peace. Isaiah 5:6, Luke 11:9-10, Psalm 105:3-4, Psalm 119:10, Matthew 6:33, Psalm 27, Jeremiah 33:3, 6-9.
T = Trust in the Lord. He will never fail you. Put all your confidence in your Lord. Believe in His power, and all that He says, He will do. Proverbs 3:5-6, john 14:1, Psalm 20:7, Jeremiah 17:7, Psalm 9:10, Romans 10:11
U = Unforgiveness can only be used by the enemy. Never stop forgiving your prodigal each and every day for whatever they have done that day. The lord Jesus taught much about loving our enemies and forgiveness. Luke 6:37, Matthew 18:21-22, Mark 11:22-25, Matthew 6:14-15, Colossians 3:13.
V = Victory is yours if you do not grow weary and give up. Jesus defeated the devil on the cross. Our Lord will fight the battle for your spouse, family and loved ones. 1 Corinthians 15:57, 2 Chronicles 20:15,17,22, Psalm 60:12,
Psalm 20:4-9
W = Wait on Gods timetable for marriage restoration. The enemy will try to have you become weary, discouraged, and defeated, but always wait on the Lord! Trust Him to always be right on time, never early, never late! Isaiah 40:27-31, Galatians 6:9-10, 2 Thessalonians 3:13, Matthew 11:28, Psalm 27:14, Psalm 130:5
X = Examine your motives for standing. Put your relationship with God first. You must want your spouses salvation before the restoration of your marriage. Lamentation 3:40, 2 Corinthians 13: 4-10, Psalm 26:2-3, Jeremiah 17:5-10
Y = You must allow God to change you first. Allow the Holy Spirit to teach you to be the woman/man of God that He wants you to be. While that is happening, God will change your spouse in response to your prayers. Psalm 25:4-5, 8-21, Psalm 19:12-14, Jeremiah 29:11-13
Z = Zip your lips! When standing for God for a healed family, often the less said the better. Isaiah 59:1-4, Proverbs 10:19, Proverbs 13:3, Proverbs 15:1 Proverbs 16:23-24, Matthew 15:10-11, 17-20, James 3:5-12
Charlyne Steinkamp
"Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. "I hate divorce." says the Lord God of Israel...." Malachi 2:15-16
Read Matthew 19:3-9. God hates divorce. He created marriage starting with Adam and Eve. "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Genesis 2:18.
Satan is out to steal, kill and destroy our marriages. "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the fullest." John 10:10
Satan has come into your home and is stealing your marriage by deceiving one marriage partner that your marriage is dead. The spouse that is deceives wants out of the marriage and usually has someone else that you may or may not know about. Throughout your marriage you may had "ups and downs" but, "...the enemy, the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." I Peter 4:8
Your spouse has been taken captive by the enemy, they are brainwashed, they are deceived, blinded to knowing the truth. Many people we work with are born-again Christians who were Pastors, Music Directors, Bible Study Teachers, Promise Keepers and active in Church leadership. We are praying that all these spouses, "will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will." 2 Tim 2:26.
"Standing" means not giving up on your spouse regardless of what they may say or do. You are standing and believing for your marriage covenant to be restored.
Read John 10. "My sheep listen to My voice; I know them, and they follow me." The Lord will go after that one lost sheep and leave the 99. Believe in the power of prayer. The Truth will set your spouse free! "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God." Mark 10:27
The affirmation .
I AM STANDING FOR THE HEALING OF MY MARRIAGE! . . . I will not give up, give in, give out or give over 'til that healing takes place. I made a vow, I said the words, I gave the pledge, I gave a ring, I took a ring, I gave myself, I trusted GOD, and said the words, and meant the words...in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in good times and in bad . . . so I am standing NOW, and will not sit down, let down, slow down, calm down, fall down, look down, or be down 'til the breakdown is torn down!
I refuse to put my eyes on outward circumstances, or listen to prophets of doom, or buy into what is trendy, worldly, popular, convenient, easy, quick, thrifty, or advantageous. . Nor will I settle for a cheap imitation of God's real thing, nor will I seek to lower God's standard, twist God's will, re-write God's Word, violate God's covenant, or accept what God hates, namely divorce!
In a world of filth, I will stay pure; surrounded by lies, I will speak the truth; where hopelessness abounds, I will hope in God: where revenge is easier, I will bless instead of curse and where the odds are stacked against me, I will trust in God's faithfulness.
I am a STANDER, and I will not acquiesce, compromise, quarrel or quit . . . I have made the choice, set my face, entered the race, believed the Word, and trusted God for all the outcome.
I will allow neither the reaction of my spouse, nor the urging of my friends, nor the advice of my loved ones, nor economic hardship, nor the prompting of the devil to make me let up, slow up, blow up, or give up 'til my marriage is healed!
~Author Unknown
Twenty-six tips for a restored Marriage
Now -How do I stand with God for a restored Marriage? Here are ABCs for a healed family. This list is provided, but the real ABCs are found only in Scripture. If you are serious about standing, and I pray you are, you need to look up every scripture referenced here. Mary you memorize and take to heart the Word of God.
A = Always put the full armor of God on yourself, your spouse and children every day so that you can take your stand against the devils tricks. Ephesians 6:10-18
B = Become a student of the word. Your direction, instruction, comfort and hope will NOT come from a person, nor from a ministry, but from God and through His written word, the Bible. You cannot claim the promises if you do not now them, unless you read and study the Bible Psalm 119: 9, 11, 105, 148
C = Each one of us made a commitment when we said, I do on our wedding day. We are standing on our covenant and not a contract that can be broken. May each of us make a commitment every day that for life regardless of our circumstances, for our spouse and marriage. Psalm 37:5, Malachi 2:11-16, Proverbs 16:1-4,7,9
D = We need to always need to know and remember who the enemy is: the devil, Satan. It is not our spouses. 1 Peter 5:8-9. John 10:10, James 4:7-8
E = Envy and jealousy can destroy our marriage restoration. Do not envy or be jealous of anything that is happening at the present time. It is only for a season. God will bless you if you love your spouse unconditionally, as He loves us. Galatians 5:24-26, James 3:13-18, 2 Corinthians 12:20
F = faith is the opposite of fear. We live by faith not by sight. Fear is from the enemy. Face every day with the excited anticipation that the God who created the universe will be right there with you, giving you not mans protection, but Gods. Psalm 27:1, Psalm 34:1-10, Hebrews 11, Matthew 9:27-31, Luke 17:1-6, Psalm 56, Matthew 8:23-26
G = Go to Church. Find that local body of believers where you can grow and serve the Lord. Corinthians 12:24-27, Malachi 3:8-12
H = Pray that each of us will be filled with the Holy Spirit including our spouse, children, loved ones and any other prodigals. We need the Holy Spirit to have power from on high. John 14:25-26, John 16:8,13, Acts 1:4,5,7-8
I = Ignore all of the insults. Become like a Noah, who built an ark for his family and they were saved. Every day you have a choice whether you will build an ark for your family to be saved, regardless of what others might say. 2 Corinthians 12:7-10, 1 Peter 3:8-9, 1 Peter 4:12-14
J = Before we can ever expect marriage restoration, each of us need to repent, confess our sins, asking for forgiveness and become a new creature in Jesus Christ. We must be saved. Many of us may have known the Lord, but did not submit to him first and our spouse second. Ask for forgiveness john 17:3, Romans 10;9. Acts 2:38,39
K = Many marriages are destroyed for lack of knowledge. While we are separated from our spouse, we make every effort to become a student of the word of God and gain wisdom, knowledge and understanding we can all learn much if we will sacrifice our time to learn all we can about Him, about our marriages and how to raise our children. Hosea 4:6, Proverbs 1:7, Proverbs 2:2:1-11, 2 Peter 3:17-18
L = Love of a stander must be unconditional, just as Christ loves each of us. There is no room in standing for a restored marriage for tough love or If you dont do it right, I will do wrong Hosea 2:6-7, 3:1, Matthew 5:39-48, 1 Corinthians 13:5-, Romans 12:9-12
M = God created marriage. It is a covenant and not a contract that cannot be broken. You made a vow to God and God hates divorce and expects us to keep our vows. Genesis 2:18-25, Numbers 30:2, Malachi 2:14-16, Matthew 19:4-9, Ephesians 5:21-33, 1 Corinthians 7:10-11, Ecclesiastes 5:4,5
N = God will provide for your daily needs. Do not worry, just seek Him and He will take care of you and your family. Deuteronomy 28:2-9, Psalm 23:1, Matthew 6:25-34, Philippians 4:19, 2 Corinthians 9:8, 3 John 2
O = Living by faith means obeying Gods word in spite of feelings circumstances or consequences. Obedience and faith are inseperateable. It is living and standing on the promises of God. John 14:15-31, Hebrews 11:8, 1 John 5:2-4, Deuteronomy 11, Nehemiah 1:4-9
P = Prayer is a priority. You must spend time alone with God. There is power in praying. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. James 5:16-13-19, 2 Chronicles 7:14-15, Psalm 145:18, Hebrews 4:16, 1 John 5:14-15, Mark 11:22-25
Q = Regardless of your circumstances you should never quit standing for your covenant marriage. Your standing and praying may make all the difference in the world between your spouses being in heaven or hell for all eternity. Galatians 6:9, Philippians 3:12-14, Luke 18:1-8, 2 Corinthians 4
R = God will be your refuge in times of trouble; He will never leave you or forsake you. Psalm 46, Psalm 18:28-50, Psalm 91, and Psalm 57:1-5
S = Seek the Lord with all your heart. He will direct your steps. If you do it your way, you will never find peace. Isaiah 5:6, Luke 11:9-10, Psalm 105:3-4, Psalm 119:10, Matthew 6:33, Psalm 27, Jeremiah 33:3, 6-9.
T = Trust in the Lord. He will never fail you. Put all your confidence in your Lord. Believe in His power, and all that He says, He will do. Proverbs 3:5-6, john 14:1, Psalm 20:7, Jeremiah 17:7, Psalm 9:10, Romans 10:11
U = Unforgiveness can only be used by the enemy. Never stop forgiving your prodigal each and every day for whatever they have done that day. The lord Jesus taught much about loving our enemies and forgiveness. Luke 6:37, Matthew 18:21-22, Mark 11:22-25, Matthew 6:14-15, Colossians 3:13.
V = Victory is yours if you do not grow weary and give up. Jesus defeated the devil on the cross. Our Lord will fight the battle for your spouse, family and loved ones. 1 Corinthians 15:57, 2 Chronicles 20:15,17,22, Psalm 60:12,
Psalm 20:4-9
W = Wait on Gods timetable for marriage restoration. The enemy will try to have you become weary, discouraged, and defeated, but always wait on the Lord! Trust Him to always be right on time, never early, never late! Isaiah 40:27-31, Galatians 6:9-10, 2 Thessalonians 3:13, Matthew 11:28, Psalm 27:14, Psalm 130:5
X = Examine your motives for standing. Put your relationship with God first. You must want your spouses salvation before the restoration of your marriage. Lamentation 3:40, 2 Corinthians 13: 4-10, Psalm 26:2-3, Jeremiah 17:5-10
Y = You must allow God to change you first. Allow the Holy Spirit to teach you to be the woman/man of God that He wants you to be. While that is happening, God will change your spouse in response to your prayers. Psalm 25:4-5, 8-21, Psalm 19:12-14, Jeremiah 29:11-13
Z = Zip your lips! When standing for God for a healed family, often the less said the better. Isaiah 59:1-4, Proverbs 10:19, Proverbs 13:3, Proverbs 15:1 Proverbs 16:23-24, Matthew 15:10-11, 17-20, James 3:5-12
Charlyne Steinkamp
