A question about profiling an abuser

[BrileyAnne]

This is my first post and if it is in the wrong place please let me know where the right place is to ask.

My question is:

Is there a website that has profiles of child or spouse abusers, one that would include religion being used as a form of abuse. A profile of someone who considers themself a christian but still abuses there family members and sees no sin in it. Someone who would be considered a bit of a religious fanatic. Someone who hides behind Christ to do as they please to the ones they are suppose to love.

I need charactristics of these types of people.

I really need information. If anyone has any please direct me that way.

 

[faithgoeson]

This is my first post and if it is in the wrong place please let me know where the right place is to ask.

My question is:

Is there a website that has profiles of child or spouse abusers, one that would include religion being used as a form of abuse. A profile of someone who considers themself a christian but still abuses there family members and sees no sin in it. Someone who would be considered a bit of a religious fanatic. Someone who hides behind Christ to do as they please to the ones they are suppose to love.

I need charactristics of these types of people.

I really need information. If anyone has any please direct me that way.

What specifically are you looking for? I personally know an entire extended family that is all out of sorts because their Pastor/uncle/father apparently used the Bible as a background to give himself permission to brutalize dozens of women and children. Are you looking for certain characteristics that tell you a man could do this? Statistics? Personal stories? There are dozens of stories of religious leaders molesting children and/or abusing women. I work with domestic violence survivors and crime victims. Maybe I can help if I know exactly what you're searching for. God bless.

 

[BrileyAnne]

What specifically are you looking for? I personally know an entire extended family that is all out of sorts because their Pastor/uncle/father apparently used the Bible as a background to give himself permission to brutalize dozens of women and children. Are you looking for certain characteristics that tell you a man could do this? Statistics? Personal stories? There are dozens of stories of religious leaders molesting children and/or abusing women. I work with domestic violence survivors and crime victims. Maybe I can help if I know exactly what you're searching for. God bless.

I guess I'm looking for certain charactristics? The man in question is someone I don't know well but I know him through his wife. I became friends with her after moving to the neighborhood and 6 months later everything when claplut. She began hating me and using her kids and my other neighbors against me. Through other people I have found out that Im not the first person this has happened to. It seems that she basically messes up every relationship she starts. After alot of anger and resentment and down in the ditch depression I have sorta come to realize that it's not ...well .......her......it's him. He is, from what I understand the master, literally, of the house hold, they have stopped going to churches on the basis that the pastor knew less then he did. When he comes home no one visits and no one leaves the house, on weekends no one visits. If you are at their house and it is nearing the time he is suppose to be home you are shoed out. There young children are very very angry children. Their youngest has been kicked out of church daycares for being violent. Parents at the school request that their children not be placed in class with their children because of the violence. But they are very religious people, all the stickers the music the yard work has something to do with religion. They have three very large crosses in there front yard, aimed directly at their neighbors house who happen to be a gay couple. On the outside they seem very Godly I guess but once you know them you find out there just isn't something right there and I am beginning to believe that the children and the wife are lashing out at me and others because of something that is going on inside their family. It worries me. It also worries me for my sake because so much hatred is being throw my way I never know what is gonna happen next, but more I'm worried about her and the kids cause ......I don't know.....I just think something is wrong there and I need to know if he fits the profile of an abuser and if he does where do I start to find proof to help the children. I honestly think that she may be two far in to be helped, I hope not but I don't know its just really really strange. It seems that everything that happens in one way or another stems from him. I think he's dangerous.

 

[faithgoeson]

Your neighbor and her children are in a very volatile, abusive relationship. Because they are God-loving people, she will probably never leave. It probably is not safe for you to try to help her. If you witness abuse toward the children, see marks that are questionable, or even just hear some scary yelling-by all means call the police. You can annonymously begin sending her literature from domestic violence shelters in your state. At least she'd have the info. if she needed. Just drop it in the mail. I'm sure their address is close to yours. All you have to do is type in domestic violence shelters in whatever your state is into your search engine to get a list of them. They'll be glad to send you info. They may even be willing to send it to her. It doesn't seem like it would be safe for you to go up and try to give her help. You must protect yourself and family. The best thing you can do is pray. It's never too late to break free of domestic violence, but this woman has apparently not hit rock bottom yet. It's a simple matter of time before something will eventually happen to bring it out into the light. We can all pray it will be soon. It also doesn't hurt to hint to teachers if you know where these children go to school. Teachers are mandated reporters of child abuse. God bless you for caring enough. So many people don't.

 

[ForHisGlory]

I guess I'm looking for certain charactristics? The man in question is someone I don't know well but I know him through his wife. I became friends with her after moving to the neighborhood and 6 months later everything when claplut. She began hating me and using her kids and my other neighbors against me. Through other people I have found out that Im not the first person this has happened to. It seems that she basically messes up every relationship she starts. After alot of anger and resentment and down in the ditch depression I have sorta come to realize that it's not ...well .......her......it's him. He is, from what I understand the master, literally, of the house hold, they have stopped going to churches on the basis that the pastor knew less then he did. When he comes home no one visits and no one leaves the house, on weekends no one visits. If you are at their house and it is nearing the time he is suppose to be home you are shoed out. There young children are very very angry children. Their youngest has been kicked out of church daycares for being violent. Parents at the school request that their children not be placed in class with their children because of the violence. But they are very religious people, all the stickers the music the yard work has something to do with religion. They have three very large crosses in there front yard, aimed directly at their neighbors house who happen to be a gay couple. On the outside they seem very Godly I guess but once you know them you find out there just isn't something right there and I am beginning to believe that the children and the wife are lashing out at me and others because of something that is going on inside their family. It worries me. It also worries me for my sake because so much hatred is being throw my way I never know what is gonna happen next, but more I'm worried about her and the kids cause ......I don't know.....I just think something is wrong there and I need to know if he fits the profile of an abuser and if he does where do I start to find proof to help the children. I honestly think that she may be two far in to be helped, I hope not but I don't know its just really really strange. It seems that everything that happens in one way or another stems from him. I think he's dangerous.

There are things to look for, yes. But there is no profile as to who can be an abuser. Every walk of life, every religion, every color, every creed, every social stance, has abusers.

What you described is as everyone before me said...definitely an abusive situation. There are numbers in every area where you can call in anonymously to have the situation checked into.

One thing every abuser does is to isolate the person/s they are abusing...from family, friends, social groups.
They make them feel like crud to make them not want to belong anywhere. They also make them push people away.

I suggest that you call anonymously as this family needs intervention..and unfortunately some woman cannot leave it...abusers make many threats, and also make sure the one thay are abusing has no means to leave.
And they can also turn the children into abusing the mother as well.

It surprises me the school did not report or do anything.

Also..I'm a childrens advocate for a program called CASA..they are nation wide and have a web site so you can see if there is an agency near you...either way, they also have a 1-800 number on their site...if you call them and give them the information, they can also call in to the local Child Welfare Services....once they are involved...they can amd will help the mother to get out of it as well.

I hope this helps and I'll be praying