OP, I won't argue the merits of the Fundamentalist position, but do take a few things into consideration:
1. Much of what you mention really doesn't have anything to do with Christian Fundamentalism, as much as it does certain American subcultures where Christian, and especially Fundamentalist Christian, belief runs deep.
2. A lot of the other things you mention, were standard beliefs among all Christians until, as I understand it, a few decades back. For example, believing abortion is wrong. (Incidentally, even as an atheist I was pro-life, so dishonest did I find the term "pro-choice").
On the abortion point, someone back made what I thought was an excellent point, about the PA governor who was a committed leftist, popular, but was pro-life, and the left hates him. This is absurdity of the left, they've become so committed to this idea that you have the "right" to choose to kill your child. It's become a cultural rallying point for them.
But I digress. Anyway, on to point three.
3. Some people are just angry about Christians. Not too long ago I read an article on Salon.com, that seriously, no exaggeration, was claiming that all of the GOP nominees are actually planning a theocratic fascist revolution (Was any fascist state ever a true theocracy?). They were not exaggerating, they really believed that. And their evidence was things like Rick Perry addressing a church by saying something like "Inside every man's heart is a hole that can only be filled by Jesus". And this, they actually thought, no exaggeration, was a sign he was planning a theocratic revolt. Not sure what people on this board will think of that theology, but it sounds somewhere between "pretty obvious to any believer", "standard belief", and "yawn...quit with the lovey-dovey stuff and start being a hospital for sinners".
Now, Rick Perry is a Methodist. How many people in liberal or atheist America have the foggiest idea what Methodists believe and what makes them different from Fundamentalists or my Church, for example?
I know sooo many people all across the US who were convinced Harold Camping (and no, he's not representative of this board, either) is Catholic. It's like...dude...huh? How do you even get that confused?
4. On minority attendance of Fundamentalist Churches. It's my understanding, and I've heard it several places, that Mexicans in the US, especially the younger generation, are abandoning my Church in droves for Evangelical Churches. I can tell you it's definitely the case where I am that any Christian Church, no matter what the denomination, is mostly Asian, Filipino, and Hispanic. Fundamentalists seem to actually be growing quite healthily.
5. They (Fundamentalist Christians) are in a great situation BECAUSE of their confidence. One poster up here referred to Catholics as liberal or moderate. The sad thing is, that's actually extremely true. Most Catholics have no idea what their faith means. They just go to Catholic parishes because that's what they've been doing since they were kids.
And it's because, in the 60s, a new breed of bishops decided that they were going to modernize, stop talking about hell, stop talking about sin, and just say lovey-dovey things all day long. Oh, and they also started not-so-secretly accepting open homosexuals into the upper echelons. This of course, lead to the homosexual pedophile rapist scandals.
The problem of course, is that everyone who hated us then, pretty much still hates us now. No one cared at all that we destroyed the whole culture and community of our faith in the West. No one cared one bit that we stopped talking about hellfire and started talking about the environment and helping the homeless. It didn't change their opinion in the slightest. Their ranks have only grown. It didn't make us look "reasonable", "intelligent" or "progressive", not to them, because by definition we can never be.
I'll tell you what did happen though. Two or three generations have grown up now not knowing a thing about their faith. They don't even know the basics.
The ones who didn't end up leaving the Church, now stay in it for reasons that honestly continue to baffle me. It's not even the complete, mind-boggling ignorance of even the most basic, common denominators among Christians (the Nicene Creed, type doctrines--though we recite this every Mass.) that gets me. That, I sorta understand, in a way. I don't excuse, but I understand.
What gets me, are those who are maybe Christian in the most *ahem* generous *ahem* sense of the word, who do hear the Church's teachings, but then completely and utterly reject them. So you get people, probably the majority of the congregation, that thinks abortion is okay, homosexuality and gay "marriage" are fine, women should be priests, the Pope is a corrupt old man, the Eucharist is just symbolic (I'm not arguing this, I'm just listing Catholic beliefs that some people reject, but still call themselves Catholic), the Bible isn't true, word for word, etc.
And what gets me the most, is these people are brimming with hatred for my Church. They want it to change, because they disagree. And it's not just the big things, either. Forget trying to totally redefine morality...no, they will throw a fit because a few scattered parishes, offer the Latin Mass. Apparently this makes us backwards and authoritarian and elitist and repressive and blah blah blah (this is what "Catholics" are saying). Keep in mind it can be hours that you'll have to drive to get to a parish that regularly has a Latin Mass. And every. single. one has plenty of English Mass celebrations every week. But the fact that any of us prefer the old way, the way things were done prior to 1960's, is enough to get their blood boiling.
Again, I'm not talking about atheists or Fundamentalists, or Jews or Muslims or Presbyterians or Pastafarians or Bill Maher. I'm talking about "Catholics".
So where has being "nice" and wishy-washy gotten us, exactly? Those how hated us then, hate us now. Except, there barely is even an "us" anymore. The only thing we did was drive out two generations of people yearning for faith.
We don't even have a community anymore. Forgetting the theology, before we decided to try to appeal to the Masses, there was at least a sense of Catholic identity. You knew who you were, you loved and cherished your background. You knew from the style of cross being displayed who was who and what it meant. It was a part of us in every sense. It made our community.
But we don't even have that. Neighborhood dogs have that. I'd kill for that.
I'm really not exaggerating. We destroyed our (physical, earthly) Church in America. When we started trying to please everyone, well, it turned out, nobody had a clue what we were saying.
What the Fundamentlists do is very good. They are masters at getting everyone up to speed on at least a few basic points, and a few bits of apologetics. Many go considerably further. They talk about hell and salvation and all this during Church, but after service they'll be your best friend. They'll make you feel welcome.
And no wonder they're growing. People confused by this modernist dictatorship of relativism are looking for confident, strong voices to follow. And the Fundamentalists provide just that. And have coffee and donuts afterwards (I mean this as a compliment). The second they start going "oh it doesn't matter just love everyone and help the poor. Be Buddhist one weekend, it's all the same", they will completely collapse.
But everyone will hate them anyway.
I guess this is a warning to Fundamentalists reading this who might agree with the OP. Be careful what you wish for.
I won't further comment on the Catholic situation, because it will veer too much into apologetics or preaching.
There are of course Christians in Europe who are hypocrites about money too.
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