A question about Communion

[Minty]

I've debated asking this as the answer is obvious really, but I would like some opinions so I'm going to ask anyway


If a person had intolerances to gluten (bread) and alcohol (wine) how would you handle partaking of Communion?

I ask because I am intolerant to alcohol and often have to avoid gluten if I've had a bad reaction to something else (I have digestive problems and anything can set me off). Just the one sip of wine leaves me dizzy and so hot I feel like I'm on fire internally, which used to spoil the rest of the service as all I could think of was getting outside in the fresh air. It doesn't help that I'm so painfully shy that I don't even feel like I can talk to the priest and explain (I'm not a regular churchgoer and also am not very close to the priest either). I've thought of asking for a blessing instead, yet that also raises problems as I cannot kneel down (I'm very overweight and have joint problems).

I would find another church, yet again, my lack of confidence stops me (anyway, that's another thread lol).

What would you do? Stay in your seat? Partake anyway and deal with it as best you could? Not go at all?

Any advice is appreciated and thank you in advance

 

[Catherineanne]

I've debated asking this as the answer is obvious really, but I would like some opinions so I'm going to ask anyway

If a person had intolerances to gluten (bread) and alcohol (wine) how would you handle partaking of Communion?

I ask because I am intolerant to alcohol and often have to avoid gluten if I've had a bad reaction to something else (I have digestive problems and anything can set me off). Just the one sip of wine leaves me dizzy and so hot I feel like I'm on fire internally, which used to spoil the rest of the service as all I could think of was getting outside in the fresh air. It doesn't help that I'm so painfully shy that I don't even feel like I can talk to the priest and explain (I'm not a regular churchgoer and also am not very close to the priest either). I've thought of asking for a blessing instead, yet that also raises problems as I cannot kneel down (I'm very overweight and have joint problems).

I would find another church, yet again, my lack of confidence stops me (anyway, that's another thread lol).

What would you do? Stay in your seat? Partake anyway and deal with it as best you could? Not go at all?

Any advice is appreciated and thank you in advance

Hiya Minty.

In my church (Anglican) there is no problem with either. My daughter is coeliac, and the priest offered to get gluten free hosts for her. She is not too sensitive, and doesn't communicate very often, so she is happy to take the normal ones (they are very small), but there is provision if she or anyone else needs it. Many churches keep gf wafers just in case, but of course you would have to have a quiet word in advance, to make sure you get the right one; very often they are square, and they are consecrated on a separate patten to prevent contamination. If you did not want gf wafers, you could ask to be given a very small piece; perhaps a quarter of a small host; that might work.

As for alcohol, the solution there is to simply receive in one kind only; take the bread and then quietly return to your seat. Both the bread and the wine are the Body and Blood of the Lord; both are complete. Just go to the altar rail, accept and consume the host and slip quietly away again. If the priest asks about it afterwards you can explain, but I very much doubt if s/he would.

In relation to the blessing, you do not have to kneel down. You just have to be at the rail. If you can't kneel, or prefer not to, then you don't have to. Sometimes people are told to carry the service sheet to indicate that they want a blessing, but crossing your arms over your chest will convey the same message; that should be understood well enough.

I hope that helps to explain some of the details but really there is nothing better than getting the courage to speak to the priest. I would recommend finding out if there is a quieter weekday service to go to, where s/he will have more time to talk to you and to discuss your concerns. I am sure that a solution can be found, if you are able to find a way to talk about this.

And if all else fails, use this:

Prayer of Spiritual Communion

My Jesus, I believe that you are truly present in the Holy Eucharist. I love you above all things, and I desire to receive you into my soul.
Since I cannot at this moment receive you Sacramentally, come at least spiritually into my heart.
I embrace you as if you were already there and unite myself wholly to you.
Never permit me to be separated from you. Amen.

I wish you well.

 

[Minty]

Thank you, CA... it helps enormously. I didn't know any of that and now I'm glad I asked.

The congregation is small, if there are 30 people there on any Sunday I'd be surprised... one week it got as low as 16, including the priest! Everyone there has been there for years and they know not only each other but also the "way it works" (if that makes sense). I like the church (I was baptised there as a baby) but my attendance has never been regular. I think that is partly because I have never felt particularly welcome... the people are nice enough, I just don't feel that "closeness" that most feel when they think of church. I wish I had someone else to go with me, alas I don't. I get so anxious and agitated when faced with having to do new things alone... I swear I have some sort of anxiety disorder (I've read about avoidant personality disorder and it was like reading about myself!)

Anyway, I'm rambling

I love that prayer and am going to write that out so that I can memorise it

 

[Catherineanne]

Thank you, CA... it helps enormously. I didn't know any of that and now I'm glad I asked.

The congregation is small, if there are 30 people there on any Sunday I'd be surprised... one week it got as low as 16, including the priest! Everyone there has been there for years and they know not only each other but also the "way it works" (if that makes sense). I like the church (I was baptised there as a baby) but my attendance has never been regular. I think that is partly because I have never felt particularly welcome... the people are nice enough, I just don't feel that "closeness" that most feel when they think of church. I wish I had someone else to go with me, alas I don't. I get so anxious and agitated when faced with having to do new things alone... I swear I have some sort of anxiety disorder (I've read about avoidant personality disorder and it was like reading about myself!)

Anyway, I'm rambling

I love that prayer and am going to write that out so that I can memorise it

I have an anxiety disorder as well; cptsd. The first time I spoke with my priest I was laughing and crying and wanting to run away, all at the same time. He was so lovely; very kind indeed. He is superb.

Another prayer that is useful is the chaplet of the blessed sacrament; it is shorter and easier than the rosary (which I also love);

Jesus in the blessed sacrament on the altar, have mercy on us.

I use that a lot, in groups of 33. 33 before Mass to calm me down. 33 after Mass to thank God for helping me. That kind of thing. It helps a lot. Use your fingers to count; nobody will notice.

I do find that the lack of closeness is often coming from me, not from the others in church. You know what Brits are like; we may look impassive from the outside, but we are a cuddly lot underneath. If you are friendly then the chances are this will be reflected back. If you keep yourself at a distance nobody will impose on you. It is very much up to us to set the tone on this one, I am afraid.

Perhaps if you can't face speaking to your minister you could write a letter and explain the problem? It can't do any harm, and it may help more than you imagine; I am sure s/he would love to help you to find a way to communicate. You could also ask whether the church is ever open for private devotions; just time to sit quietly on your own. My priest understood my need for this, and gave me a key to the church; he is very special indeed.

Chat any time, or PM if you like; I am here for you.

 

[SnowyMacie]

Most churches probably offer an alternative.

 

[MsTopaz]

You don't have to have an anxiety disorder to experience Communion as anxiety-provoking - I always feel uncomfortable until I have mastered all the logistical details in a new church.

I would email the priest and clarify things that way if doing it face-to-face sounds too overwhelming. I've used email before to communicate with clergy and it worked out well.

 

[Izdaari Eristikon]

I've debated asking this as the answer is obvious really, but I would like some opinions so I'm going to ask anyway


If a person had intolerances to gluten (bread) and alcohol (wine) how would you handle partaking of Communion?

I ask because I am intolerant to alcohol and often have to avoid gluten if I've had a bad reaction to something else (I have digestive problems and anything can set me off). Just the one sip of wine leaves me dizzy and so hot I feel like I'm on fire internally, which used to spoil the rest of the service as all I could think of was getting outside in the fresh air. It doesn't help that I'm so painfully shy that I don't even feel like I can talk to the priest and explain (I'm not a regular churchgoer and also am not very close to the priest either). I've thought of asking for a blessing instead, yet that also raises problems as I cannot kneel down (I'm very overweight and have joint problems).

I would find another church, yet again, my lack of confidence stops me (anyway, that's another thread lol).

What would you do? Stay in your seat? Partake anyway and deal with it as best you could? Not go at all?

Any advice is appreciated and thank you in advance

Not an issue at my church. Gluten-free wafers and unfermented grape juice are provided for those who need (or just prefer) them. As we use our own in-house baked unleavened bread (which is quite tasty, btw), you would never mistake it for the gf wafers.

 

[Catherineanne]

The Holy Eucharist is very important indeed. It is the central focus of our faith; where we encounter the Real Presence of the Lord himself; Emmanuel, God with us.

Those who have eyes to see, let them see.