A must-have in your potential bf/gf

This is kind of a spin-off to the "Who are you attracted to" thread. It got me thinking and I was wondering two questions:

1) What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

2) Is there a must-have your potential bf/gf has to have and if so, what is it? (Edit: You can't say Christian b/c this is CF...I'm kind of new here but I'm assuming most posters are Christians and will require their bf/gf to be a Christian so anything else?)

I'll start:
1) Height/build
2) Yes. Height

Despite the fact that they have to be a Christian, with some people, the difference in answers may vary but with me, height is a big issue. I'm 5' 10.5" so I'll never date a guy who is shorter than me. Not an option. Humor and personality are a close runner-up but height takes the cake.

Sounds fun...

1. Physically, I always notice eyes first. I'm always attracted to beautiful eyes more than anything else. Emotionally, I notice how easy or hard it is to make them laugh. I need a girl who's serious and such, but I want a girl who can also laugh, and if I can make them laugh it makes the conversation a lot easier and honestly, just more fun.

2. They need to be Christian. That's the only thing I'm really unflexible about.

1) What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
The first thing I notice about guys are their eyes. You can tell a lot from most people just by looking at their eyes (unless they are really guarded, but then you can tell that they are guarded).
If a guy is wearing sunglasses that make it hard to see his eyes (which annoys me), I probably notice his hair or lack of hair.

2) Is there a must-have your potential bf/gf has to have and if so, what is it?
This makes me think of eharmony's must-haves.
I suppose my must-haves would be a (Christian) man who is not super conservative and is okay with not having children.

1.) Smile
2.) Yes
a.) Must be a Christian
b.) Doesn't have children but must wants to have children

first thing i notice is eyes and/or smile.


sorry i know this is against the rules (and you may actually be surprised at how many Christians don't have this as a qualification in a potential SO) but he's gotta be Christian. Hes also gotta be a logical thinker, i know faith has a role for emotion to play but i want my man to lead us with his head and not deceptive feelings.

Also if he's a musician, bonus points.

SportsJunkie25 said:

......
Despite the fact that they have to be a Christian, with some people, the difference in answers may vary but with me, height is a big issue. I'm 5' 10.5" so I'll never date a guy who is shorter than me. Not an option. Humor and personality are a close runner-up but height takes the cake.

Click to expand...

Wow...a 5'6" guy just said hi.

Kevlite and Historia,

I just edited the OP. Besides being a Christian, do you have any other must-haves? If you had to choose, what would it be?

Puffca, your #2 is a good one. That has me thinking - would I prefer someone who was taller than me with kids or someone who was shorter than me without kids? That's a tough one IMHO. I'm really big on not dating people w/ kids so we'll just hope I'll never have to choose between something like that.

puffca said:

Wow...a 5'6" guy just said hi.

Click to expand...

Well hello "5'6" guy"

I used to be 5'11 3/4" (unless they measured wrong all of those years)...I'm shrinking.

SportsJunkie25 said:

Well hello "5'6" guy"

I used to be 5'11 3/4" (unless they measured wrong all of those years)...I'm shrinking.

Click to expand...

You still have a ways to go in order to qualify yourself for a date with me.
Please shrink faster.








j/k

SportsJunkie25 said:

Kevlite and Historia,

I just edited the OP. Besides being a Christian, do you have any other must-haves? If you had to choose, what would it be?

Puffca, your #2 is a good one. That has me thinking - would I prefer someone who was taller than me with kids or someone who was shorter than me without kids? That's a tough one IMHO. I'm really big on not dating people w/ kids so we'll just hope I'll never have to choose between something like that.

Click to expand...

umm... There's nothing other then Christian that I would require out of my partner. I'll meet women with bigger senses of humor, prettier, more intellectual, etc, and all that really is to me is variety in women. I don't need a specific quality to stand out, as long as the girl has some qualities in general (which really, all women do). In other words, I could be just as happy with someone who isn't very intellectual but very funny, as I could with someone who's really smart but doesn't have a great sense of humor.

I mean there's other things I guess I need to, like the girl to not be addicted to drugs, things like that. but personality wise, I'm not very picky. I like all types of women, they are all amazing

p.s. I'm 5'7" I have a good girl friend who's 5'11" and I always call her a giant, or amazon woman, hehe. She tells me she's going to stomp on me if I keep it up :o

puffca said:

You still have a ways to go in order to qualify yourself for a date with me.
Please shrink faster. ...

Click to expand...

HAHAHA! I'll try. I'll keep you posted.

kevlite2020 said:

..

p.s. I'm 5'7" I have a good girl friend who's 5'11" and I always call her a giant, or amazon woman, hehe. She tells me she's going to stomp on me if I keep it up :o

Click to expand...

Lol. That reminds me of some random guy who came up behind me (and whisper in my ear) and said, "Wow! You're a such beeeaaaautiful amazon!!" I was thinking to myself, uuummm...that doesn't sound like a compliment to me. I think he was confused as to why I didn't take to his liking.

I also had a guy yell at me, across the mall, and say, "Heeeeyyy!!! You're a nice tall, glass of water; can I get a sip!?"

SportsJunkie25 said:

HAHAHA! I'll try. I'll keep you posted.



Lol. That reminds me of some random guy who came up behind me (and whisper in my ear) and said, "Wow! You're a such beeeaaaautiful amazon!!" I was thinking to myself, uuummm...that doesn't sound like a compliment to me. I think he was confused as to why I didn't take to his liking.

I also had a guy yell at me, across the mall, and say, "Heeeeyyy!!! You're a nice tall, glass of water; can I get a sip!?"

Click to expand...

hahaha that's awesome. In my opinion, ya know things like height are controlled by God. You can't make yourself taller or shorter (other than those stretchy torture things), you just have to accept what God gave ya and be able to be comfortable about it and joke about it. I always give tall people crap and they always return it, it's all in good fun

kevlite2020 said:

hahaha that's awesome. In my opinion, ya know things like height are controlled by God. You can't make yourself taller or shorter (other than those stretchy torture things), you just have to accept what God gave ya and be able to be comfortable about it and joke about it. I always give tall people crap and they always return it, it's all in good fun

Click to expand...

Oh, don't get me wrong...I LOVE being tall. I like standing out. I like being different. I just thought it was a weird pick-up line.

And, I always joke w/ my shorter friends (if they make tall jokes) about squashing them. I guess all tall people say that.

1) Hmmm, should I be honest or diplomatic?

2) Must be faithful and honest. Anything else would be an added bonus, I think.

SportsJunkie25 said:

This is kind of a spin-off to the "Who are you attracted to" thread. It got me thinking and I was wondering two questions:

1) What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

2) Is there a must-have your potential bf/gf has to have and if so, what is it? (Edit: You can't say Christian b/c this is CF...I'm kind of new here but I'm assuming most posters are Christians and will require their bf/gf to be a Christian so anything else?)

Click to expand...

What I notice first: Face/height/build. Yep, simultaneously. I have some crazy eyeballs.





These are mandatory (in no particular order):

1. Possesses a warm heart/patience - though I guess that can coincide with being a Christian. Sometimes, that's not the case though.
2. High level of intelligence (as there can be varying forms of intelligence as there are degrees of intelligence, I am open to those varying forms)
3. Great sense of humor.
4. Enjoys physical affection in a relationship. I'm not talking about holding hands all the time, but rather, being playful. I can be very playful and I enjoy being reciprocated or at the very least, I want someone who's comfortable with me being playful. If he likes being flirted with, I'm all on that.
5. Is level-headed and balanced in his life. Likes to enjoy an evening at home, but also likes to go out and dive into new experiences, discovering his home state or other areas of the world. His diet is not too restrictive, but he's healthy and splurges on occasion. I've had relationships wherein a significant other was very unhealthy and so I began getting ungodly unhealthy, too. I vow never to be that way again. Also, I don't want an alcoholic nor any substance abuser, but I don't want someone who's going to "poo-poo" my bottles of wine. I've said before that I'm incredibly turned on by guys who've never had an ounce of alcohol and I hold to that, but I don't want to be with someone who sees my drinking on occasion as a weakness.
6. Thinks globally. All of my exes were very intelligent men who were knowledgeable about current events, not only in this area, but abroad. That's important to me.
7. Is honest and trustworthy with a high degree of integrity - again, probably goes back to the Christian thing.

SportsJunkie25 said:

Puffca, your #2 is a good one. That has me thinking - would I prefer someone who was taller than me with kids or someone who was shorter than me without kids? That's a tough one IMHO. I'm really big on not dating people w/ kids so we'll just hope I'll never have to choose between something like that.

Click to expand...

The child thing wouldn't bother me, so long as the relationship with the child's mother is a healthy one. He also would need to be a good father, as well. I wouldn't get myself into a situation where there is a high potential for unnecessary drama.





Ps. I'm tall, too. It's funny you mention being 5'11", but shrinking. In middle school, I was measured in at 5'11"; in high school, 5'10"/5'9.5". Now, I'm 30 and 5'9."

Thomas1984 said:

1) Hmmm, should I be honest or diplomatic?

2) Must be faithful and honest. Anything else would be an added bonus, I think.

Click to expand...

LOL! Honest. Let's hear it haha. I could just imagine...

white dove said:

What I notice first: Face/height/build. Yep, simultaneously. I have some crazy eyeballs.

Click to expand...

My sequence is height...then build...then face but not all at the same time. You have skills!

white dove said:

These are mandatory (in no particular order):

1. Possesses a warm heart/patience - though I guess that can coincide with being a Christian. Sometimes, that's not the case though.
2. High level of intelligence (as there can be varying forms of intelligence as there are degrees of intelligence, I am open to those varying forms)
3. Great sense of humor.
4. Enjoys physical affection in a relationship. I'm not talking about holding hands all the time, but rather, being playful. I can be very playful and I enjoy being reciprocated or at the very least, I want someone who's comfortable with me being playful. If he likes being flirted with, I'm all on that.
5. Is level-headed and balanced in his life. Likes to enjoy an evening at home, but also likes to go out and dive into new experiences, discovering his home state or other areas of the world. His diet is not too restrictive, but he's healthy and splurges on occasion. I've had relationships wherein a significant other was very unhealthy and so I began getting ungodly unhealthy, too. I vow never to be that way again. Also, I don't want an alcoholic nor any substance abuser, but I don't want someone who's going to "poo-poo" my bottles of wine. I've said before that I'm incredibly turned on by guys who've never had an ounce of alcohol and I hold to that, but I don't want to be with someone who sees my drinking on occasion as a weakness.
6. Thinks globally. All of my exes were very intelligent men who were knowledgeable about current events, not only in this area, but abroad. That's important to me.
7. Is honest and trustworthy with a high degree of integrity - again, probably goes back to the Christian thing.

Click to expand...

Which is is most important to you? Decision time!

1. Eyes/smile. If they have gorgeous eyes and a kind smile that has the ability to make me melt then I think that is simply awesome in someone
2. They must be kind to others, gentle, loyal and caring oh...and have nice eyes and smile (see #1)

1) What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

I noticed how they carry themselves, how they talk, and their smile


2) Is there a must-have your potential bf/gf has to have and if so, what is it?

They must be open and willing to accept love and well as give love, and want a serious, loving relationship where we would be there for each other through thick and thin, and actually be able to communicate about how we feel. I don't care what they look like, what kind of job they have, etc., but I do care that they have a good heart, are kind, and are just genuninely a good person. Without a good, loving heart, the person does not have potential to be my boyfriend, even if they are a Christian.

She must meet my sky-high expectations. And if not, she's on her way back to Singlesville.