A close friend suddenly announced ...

[LilyLamb]

... to her family that she wants a divorce.  She does not think it was God's will for her to get married to her husband six years ago.  She and her husband are Christians and were saved before they got married.

She wants to sell the house, go to a different church and change her life so that she is no longer living to please other people.  She has been battling depression for some time and told her DDs (they are from a former marriage) that she has not been happy with this marriage ... she was battling depression and attempted suicide last year shortly after being placed on an antidepressant ... but then they changed her meds and she got into counseling (someone recommended through her church) and we thought she was doing better.

She has fallen in with some new "friends" and is now saying that she thinks she is lesbian.  Her counselor told her DDs not to worry about her ... that her mom knows what she's doing and everything will be okay.

She is not responding to my emails or phone messages - we've been through a lot together in the past and we were pretty close until I moved out of state and we've been unable to visit like we use to.

Has anyone else been through anything like this?  Any advice or words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

I'm not so concerned about her saying that she's a lesbian - we all have sin to deal with (some are alcoholics, some drug addicts, some addicted to porn etc) ..... I just pray that she doesn't "act" upon that thought and get steered down the wrong path ....

 

 

[ZiSunka]

This is a symptom of her depression. She thinks that if she radically changes her life, the depression will go away. It is also completely self-centered. She doesn't care how she hurts her husband and children, as long as she gets to live for herself.

She needs to go to a counsellor with Christian values. I had a close friend who had some troubles and got into counselling with a non-Christian psychologist, and one day he said that there was this one man he had felt attracted to years ago, and she told him he was probably gay, and that denying that was the cause of his pain. He believed it and she encouraged him to try out some gay relationships. He did that for fifteen years, then figured out that he wasn't happier, he was sadder. Some counsellors really mess up people's lives, and since they don't have to deal with the aftermath, they don't care.

So, a new psychologist and a new psychiatrist .

 

[ZiSunka]

By the way, there's a great book, "Someone I Love Is Gay," that I found to be an excellent help in dealing with a friend who came out to me.

 

[LilyLamb]

thanks for the advice Lamb's Love

 

[Blessed-one]

i don't have much of an advice.. only, keep praying and trying to reach her, you never know when the Lord may be using you to get your friend back to the right path.

 

[Auntie]

Originally posted by LilyLamb
... She does not think it was God's will for her to get married to her husband six years ago

I tend to agree with lambslove, that your friend is not really seeking God's will for her life. The peace she so desires is not in a man or a woman, it is in God. The happiness she is seeking, she will never find it in the world or in a relationship with another human being.

Sometimes we think that the solution to all our problems is "out there somewhere", but usually the solutions are within our own heart.