30 but not 30...

[Nienna_Lady_of_Tears]

I am physically 30, but I am nothing like the typical 30 year old, at least not where I live.

I am married, which in this area for a woman is expected by 22, if not earlier. I got married when I was almost 27. We have no kids. Most women my age here have two or three children by my age. A couple even have four. I have nothing in common with thirty year old women in my area. Their lives tend to revolve around children, and if not children, then their work. I don't even have a job. I wish I did, but I don't.

I feel that there are certain "milestones" to meet before you hit 30, and I haven't met any of them. Things like having a career (not just a job) and a degree. I have neither. Things like a down payment for your first house. I'm still renting, and barely affording a roof in the poorest sector of town. And this is an area with a low cost of living. Things like knowing how to drive.

My family hindered my independence at every turn, to the point where I had to become homeless in order to take charge of my own life. But I fear it's too late.

 

[FutureAndAHope]

Hi,

I asked the LORD for a verse of scripture for you and this is what he gave me.

Mal 3:14-17 You said, 'It is futile to serve God,' and 'What did we get out of it when we carried out his requirements and went about like mourners in the presence of the LORD of the Heavenly Armies?' and 'Now we call the arrogant one blessed. Those who do evil prosper and those who challenge God escape the consequences.'" Then those who feared the LORD talked with each other. The LORD listened and took note, and a scroll of remembrance was written in his presence about those who fear the LORD and honor His name. "They'll be mine," says the LORD of the Heavenly Armies, "in the day when I prepare my treasured possession. I'll spare them, just as a man spares his own son who serves him.

What we can gain from this scripture is a biblical principal. We may go through times in life as a Christian where every thing seems against us. To the point that we ask the question like you have, "why is my life not blessed". This is a question I have asked myself in life before, when I was in tough employment, doing hard labour, or unmarried and unable to find a partner. But if we persist in fearing God he will eventually bless us. My life now is in the blessed stage, I went through years of trouble and termoil, but I tried to fear God the best I could. In the end this paid off for me, I went to university, got a Degree, got and awesome job as a Website Designer. God told me a person I would marry, and we got married, all worked out good. Life is good, and I am aware God wants to bless all of us. He will "spare you as one who spares his own son".

 

[Timyone]

umm I am 30 and not married, and not stressed by it! I go off at my brothers for trying to get me to fit their married with kids stereotypes!! You don't have to have kids if you get married either really, see how the vibe goes hey!

I seem to do other milestones, like degrees, and I did a half ironman yesterday with out really training, but I don't know if milestones and all that really matter that much, its more about the people hey

 

[mj0214]

I didn't get married until I was 28 and we have yet to have any children. It is frustrating when people constantly ask where my children are. At my nephew's birthday party, a woman asked me which child was mine and I told her I didn't have any and she responded "Why are you here?" Society expects certain things out of us and the fact of the matter is that we are all on different time frames. You create your own milestones

 

[Nerd Girl Supreme]

It's never "too late" with God. Repeat that to yourself every morning!!

Some of my favorite verses say "nothing shall be impossible with God" and "is there anything too difficult for the Lord?" I cling to those verses when I start thinking it's too late in my life for this or that.

I was a late bloomer, too. Didn't marry until I was 34 and we just bought our first house last year, so I was an apartment girl till I was 34 as well. There's no shame in any of that. Society may have its own standards of what's expected and normal, but that's just an average, there are LOTS of people who function outside of those boundaries

I mean, I had my son when I was just 23, and people are STILL asking me when I'm going to have more (cause most women my age are still poppin' em out). And I'm thinking "Shoot, I'm done with that phase of my life, I'm already planning for my early retirement!" Is it out of the norm? Sure. Do I care? NOPE.

Be YOU... be the best "you" that you can be... and be proud of it. You answer to God for where you are in your life, you don't answer to anyone else.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

I'm 31 and my fiance is 27. We aren't having kids though. I am disabled and live at home.

 

[Purge187]

I can sympathize.

I turn 34 in a month and have been looking for a mate for three years now, without success. I don't want kids, which obviously makes my options limited. I ask God that I may receive those kinds of "here-and-now" blessings before the curtain goes down, but if you watch the news for even five minutes, it looks like it's gonna fall fairly soon. I don't expect God to stop the world from rotating on its axis for me, but it still can be very frustrating. It doesn't help to see former schoolmates who don't even believe in God to be doing so well in life. (Yes, I admit to being jealous sometimes.) But I thank God everyday for the many blessings I do have--faith, family, health, America, a job--which I think may be one of the keys to future blessings.

Pray for each other, friends!

 

[Nerd Girl Supreme]

Purge - hang in there. My husband was 43 when we met, and he'd never been married before Being faithful, patient, and obedient during your single years is the very best thing you can do to remain ready for the moment your wife-to-be DOES arrive on the scene

 

[Annie Mouse]

Don't feel badly about where you're at. God's timetable isn't the same for everyone. Then again, He doesn't even have the same calling on everyone's life. Just do the best with where you're at.

I'm well into my thirties, and I've never even had a boyfriend. I've met some people where I currently live who started having babies when they were 14. By the time they were my age, they got started on having grandbabies. It's a whole different lifestyle, one I, as a never been kissed virgin, have never really been a part of.

 

[Two Scoops]

You cannot live life based on how others around you are living. That's an important lesson that Christ taught us. Christ came to give us life abundantly. We should put on His mind. If we compare ourselves with others we will always come up short and live in fear. That is not God's will but satan's lie.

2 Corinthians 10:12

New King James Version (NKJV)

12 For we dare not class ourselves or compare ourselves with those who commend themselves. But they, measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.

Matthew 6:20-21

New King James Version (NKJV)

20 but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.




Corinthians 2:15-16

New King James Version (NKJV)
15 But he who is spiritual judges all things, yet he himself is rightly judged by no one. 16 For “who has known the mind of the Lord that he may instruct Him? But we have the mind of Christ.

 

[Purge187]

A personal favorite is Psalms 37:8, which says, "Stop your anger! Turn from your rage! Do not envy others -- it only leads to harm."

 

[nestoj]

A colleague of mine got his degree at 40, quit his job as a procurement sector chief and headed into IT consulting. He's a happy man. It's never too late.

 

[nestoj]

Double post

 

[ninzae]

A colleague of mine got his degree at 40, quit his job as a procurement sector chief and headed into IT consulting. He's a happy man. It's never too late.

I agree.. Never too late especially if its about finding happiness.

From where I am now, most people finish their degrees mid 30s because they are so fond of "gap years" (not a year but many) spent in traveling all around the world and just figuring out what exactly they want to do. : )