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After many weeks of trying to pray, trying to call upon the name of the Lord, I simpy give up. He is not hearing my prayers or answering, there is no presence of God, no feeling no anything, just cold emotionlessness. I have no doubt God is real due to his work in the life of others but for me...

I want to be saved very badly but have took part in the "blasphemy challenge" in the past to win a free atheist dvd but now I a have started to see that God is real and the truth of creation and am terrified, how can I get saved is there any way if I committed the sin Jesus calls unpardonable...