Dream of Jesus Counseling and Teaching

I dreamed I was in a large church building. I didn't know the people there well, and was new. It felt as if I was accepted as part of this group of believers, and they expected me to to participate through service.

I was going around different parts of the building, helping out in various ways and hoping they would feel I was useful and productive. No one really talked with me directly, and it felt like even though I was there taking part, I wasn't really one of them and they didn't view me as someone who belonged, just someone to receive service from.

It was announced that Jesus was there and would be staying for a while. He wouldn't be preaching or performing miracles. He was only going to be counseling and teaching people privately, one on one. He had space He was using in an office or classroom that looked like it had been turned into a small, cozy library. The lighting was dim with a warm glow, sufficient for seeing but not overstimulating (which is something I really need in my real life because light causes overstimulation for me which eventually leads to stress headaches). There wasn't much furniture in there, and it was low to the ground, but it was comfortable.

Everyone had to sign up for a time for teaching or counseling and could only have small sessions with Him. As I was working around the building, I noticed a man came out of the room, and left the door open. I could see Jesus in there, and He was just calmly and peacefully waiting for someone else to come in. He seemed to be meditating.

I went in the room because I needed to put something away in there. I spoke to him briefly to be polite and hoped he wouldn't be bothered by me entering. He didn't seem disturbed at all and it seemed like He had a welcoming attitude. I didn't want to leave the room. I wanted to stay in there and wanted Him to talk to me. I asked if we could talk a little even though I didn't have a session scheduled. He said yes. I felt moved that He was willing to lay aside his mediation and give me time. He picked up a book, and He meant to teach from it but I wasn't sure if the teaching was for me or others.

I sat and waited for him to speak. He didn't. I realized He wanted me to ask Him questions or talk with Him about things I struggle with. I didn't want to. I began to feel numb and my mind was going blank about details of my life.

I didn't want to explain the difficult things or get deep into the emotional topics. It felt like too much, and I'm tired of talking about it and explaining things (both in my dream and in real life). I just kept hoping He would say something. I worried I was wasting His time and that others would think that. I was also worried they would disapprove of me spending time with Jesus and working through issues instead of serving. He only stayed quiet and waited. He had a patient and kind demeanor. He never opened the book He was holding or mentioned it.

After a while, I felt like it was pointless to continue sitting there with no conversation. I got up and walked out. I walked away thinking and hoping that He would be willing to listen when I felt ready, maybe a little at a time. I felt lonely when I left and didn't want to be out of His presence. I worried that I wouldn't be able to go in and talk with Him again. He was still sitting and He was watching me though the door. I walked away because I was supposed to be busy doing things.

Thinking about this room more, it was in the center of the building with no windows and only one door, one way in and out. The door was always open. Jesus never left the room. The vibe I got was that He was always waiting.