asquirrel
Member
- Jun 6, 2014
- 21
- 4
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Single
Look up the Rat Park experiment. Long story short? Addictions of any kind, drugs, alcohol, porn, whatever. They all stem from a need to cope with a life that isn't good enough for one reason or another. Maybe you're alone. Maybe your expectations for life don't line up with what is possible/achievable. Maybe you're putting up with a job that treats you badly. Maybe you want to grow and can't.
The answer to how you go about kicking the addiction is to, first, identify what is wrong and why. You may need to have some very uncomfortable conversations if you can't identify this internally. But find brothers and sisters who can listen to you and help you find root causes. If you have absolutely no one, consider running a large language model through ollama. If you can write a 500 word essay (or more) on what you think happened and why, it might see trends you cannot. Pattern recognition is what LLMs are built to do. But, again, I consider this a last resort option, only if you have no one else you trust to have those conversations with.
Once you know the root cause, you can find the solution. Are you alone and trying to cope? Find people to spend time with and build a community. "But there are no third places!" then make one. Find a new life running a restaurant, or arcade, or coffee shop. Create a maker space. Run a group for some activity. If what you need doesn't exist, at least try creating it.
If the problem is a lack of the right kind of attention from your partner, talk to them about what they need from you. They're probably at their limit too, so start by being what they need first.
You haven't given up, you're just out of ideas. Now you have more.
The answer to how you go about kicking the addiction is to, first, identify what is wrong and why. You may need to have some very uncomfortable conversations if you can't identify this internally. But find brothers and sisters who can listen to you and help you find root causes. If you have absolutely no one, consider running a large language model through ollama. If you can write a 500 word essay (or more) on what you think happened and why, it might see trends you cannot. Pattern recognition is what LLMs are built to do. But, again, I consider this a last resort option, only if you have no one else you trust to have those conversations with.
Once you know the root cause, you can find the solution. Are you alone and trying to cope? Find people to spend time with and build a community. "But there are no third places!" then make one. Find a new life running a restaurant, or arcade, or coffee shop. Create a maker space. Run a group for some activity. If what you need doesn't exist, at least try creating it.
If the problem is a lack of the right kind of attention from your partner, talk to them about what they need from you. They're probably at their limit too, so start by being what they need first.
You haven't given up, you're just out of ideas. Now you have more.
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