how old is too old?

darktipper · Jan 28, 2012

Too old= in 20s...........
So I am too old :bow:

I am FREE! I can't be tamed! :idea:

avi8tor · Jan 28, 2012

I like to date older. Sometimes even women in their 30s and I'm just 25. Older girls don't have as much drama and we seem to connect better overall. I guess I'm just mature for my age since what I do for a living requires so much responsibility for someone my age.

AndrewZinc · Jan 28, 2012

I've been reading about John Knox, who started Scottish Presbyterianism in 1560, and after his first wife died, he married a 17-year old. He was 54!

I suppose this was more acceptable back then.

I've never had a girlfriend but would probably go up to 10 years younger (16 being the age of consent here) and 1/2 older. There was 10 years between my grandparents.

It is interesting that in the majority of posts, male members would go 10 years younger while females would go 10 years older. Just as well it matches!

redblue22 · Jan 28, 2012

I really don't know. I mean, I feel like I have to pick from those who are actually interested in me. And for some reason younger attractive women are the only ones who do take interest in me.

Humble Pie · Jan 28, 2012

I would question his motives given the almost 20 yr age difference. To me, that is tooooo old.

Sonfest Rocker · Jan 28, 2012

I dated someone who was 16 years older than me that was a mistake. I would go 5 years older and maybe 2-3 years younger.

Toro · Jan 28, 2012

avi8tor said:
I like to date older. Sometimes even women in their 30s and I'm just 25. Older girls don't have as much drama and we seem to connect better overall. I guess I'm just mature for my age since what I do for a living requires so much responsibility for someone my age.

Careful with that line of thinking, I thought the same at your age.

I dated 3 women in my 20's that were in their 30's and ALL 3 of them had more drama than girls I dated at 18.

One of the women insisted that I was making her choose between her daughter and me which wasn't the case, she was a new mother so I tried to understand, but after dating for 10 months without a single date because she didn't want to leave her daughter to go see a movie or anything with me, yet had no problem leaving her daughter to get drunk with friends.... I had to walk from that.

Another woman I was with for about 4 years, she didn't seem to care what bothered me (flashing random men and other similar things), did what she wanted and I told her I would walk, I did and she became my stalker for awhile.

The last woman I dated I had been dating for 6 years, MORE DRAMA THAN ANYTHING IN MY LIFE COMBINED.

I have never dated a woman in her 20s because during mine I was convinced that to find a woman that was less into games and more into things with meaning I should aim older.

Didn't work out that way in my exp. and I have been spending the last year or so single enjoying the peace and recovering from my crazy drama filled 20s that I was so intent on avoiding.

I guess the overall message, age brackets are meaningless.. games are played by all, "judge" the individual and figure out their "angle".

Humble Pie · Jan 28, 2012

AndrewZinc said:
I've been reading about John Knox, who started Scottish Presbyterianism in 1560, and after his first wife died, he married a 17-year old. He was 54!

Sorry John Knox but that's just being a pervert.
I'd like to add that sometimes men do find older women attractive. A man 10 years my junior went to lengths to tell me how happy we'd be despite the age difference. I never saw him again!:o

darktipper · Jan 28, 2012

if there is like a 20 yr old age gap.............. call the police lol

Niels · Jan 28, 2012

Two guys I know, who were a few years ahead of me in youth group when I was a teenager, just recently met their wives. One was (and still is) a talented athlete, musician, student, and a missionary to boot. He even ran Christian sports camps for kids. Quite a few women wanted to date him, but he didn't date very often, and he didn't meet his a wife until he was around my age. She's about 10 years younger than him, and she just gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Seeing them together, it's obvious that they're right for each other. The other guy is a true gentle giant, and there was nothing about him to suggest that he would remain single into his late thirties. Active, healthy, strong Christian etc., yet chronically single. His wife is 15 years younger than him, but I hear they're great together.

Although I feel kind of bad that it took them so long to find love, I feel blessed to know them. Even when they were younger, they were mature, fun to hang out with, and genuinely good guys. Not perfect, of course, but the reasons for their singleness had nothing to do with immaturity, social ineptitude, or whatever insults some like throw at older singles. These are quality guys, and it gives me hope that the reasons for my singleness have less to do with being deeply flawed than simply not meeting the right one yet.

avi8tor · Jan 28, 2012

Toro said:
Careful with that line of thinking, I thought the same at your age.

I dated 3 women in my 20's that were in their 30's and ALL 3 of them had more drama than girls I dated at 18.

You have to see my perception though...coming from most recently living in Southern California where girls in their 20s think they are living in an episode of "the hills" with their iPhones glued to there hands "like oh mah gosh you wouldn't believe what happened to me last night..."

So if you want a normal girl who appreciates a career man then you have to date a little older...

Toro · Jan 29, 2012

avi8tor said:
You have to see my perception though...coming from most recently living in Southern California where girls in their 20s think they are living in an episode of "the hills" with their iPhones glued to there hands "like oh mah gosh you wouldn't believe what happened to me last night..."

So if you want a normal girl who appreciates a career man then you have to date a little older...

I hear ya, I was actually out in socal (SD) during one of my "older women encounters" I loved it out there (the weather and lack of humidity), but I guess you always end up back in the place of your roots after trying to "find yourself".

Just givin some free friendly advice, older women are just as likely to play those same games they just have experience at playing it so they hide it better.

I'm not saying you are on a "wrong" track by any means just the same line of thinking I had at your age and passing on a little of what I learned.

Daughter of Ararat · Jan 29, 2012

If you have to ask if it is too old, it probably is too much age gap. I try to stick within a few years of my age. I don't place an exact limit on it though, but within a few years.

Paulwat · Thursday at 6:52 AM

Mu take is that I think if there is an age gap of more than 12 years in a relationship then it's too big of an age gap.

DragonFox91 · Thursday at 6:13 PM

10 years up or down.

Anything more then that, you're gonna run into problems.

JAM2b · Friday at 10:19 AM

Sometimes when older people seek someone very young, they want to do that so that can have someone they hope will be easily controlled or manipulated. This is not always the case, but it is something to be aware of amd proceed cautiously until you know them well.

The older you get, the less age gaps seem to matter because life experiences make a huge difference in how you relate to people, understand and assert boundaries, and view life in general.

When I was young I didn't feel comfortable with more than a two year difference. Since my early 30's, I have had a general guideline that I don't want to be with anyone with more than 10-12 year difference. Given the right circumstances and respect, I could have some wiggle room for that.

how old is too old?

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