How can I beat sexual temptation

Tyler52 · Jul 28, 2023

I’m struggling with sexual temptation. I’m engaged but have 9months to go. I don’t know how to fight it. I wan t it so bad that it makes me mad. If anyone has any advice then please tell me. Please pray for me.

trophy33 · Jul 29, 2023

If its so extreme that it makes you "mad", then its probably because of some underlying problem, like addiction to porn and similar, or because of hormonal disbalance in your body.

Eat healthy diet, sleep well, exercise, try some fasting, if it will not help, you can try to consult some specialist.

Tyler52 · Jul 29, 2023

myst33 said:
If its so extreme that it makes you "mad", then its probably because of some underlying problem, like addiction to inappropriate content and similar, or because of hormonal disbalance in your body.

Eat healthy diet, sleep well, exercise, try some fasting, if it will not help, you can try to consult some specialist.

Thank you

trophy33 · Jul 29, 2023

Regarding healthy diet, be aware that many things even marketed as "healthy" are not natural to our bodies and can disrupt your hormonal balance.

Also, if you are under a lot of stress, sexuality may be some form of an escape from it. Its just an example that it can have many various causes, but the solution to various problems is always "one" - live healthily, both mentally and physically.

Tyler52 · Jul 29, 2023

myst33 said:
Regarding healthy diet, be aware that many things even marketed as "healthy" are not natural to our bodies and can disrupt your hormonal balance.

Also, if you are under a lot of stress, sexuality may be some form of an escape from it. Its just an example that it can have many various causes, but the solution to various problems is always "one" - live healthily, both mentally and physically.

So, what does that look like

oikonomia · Jul 29, 2023

Tyler52 said:
I’m struggling with sexual temptation. I’m engaged but have 9months to go. I don’t know how to fight it. I wan t it so bad that it makes me mad. If anyone has any advice then please tell me. Please pray for me.

This is a big subject not remedied in a few posts.
But if you are engaged you ought to realize the without self-control married life will be difficult.

If you want a happy and healthy marriage start to look to the Lord Jesus for self control now.

Start your day with a time in the Bible and prayer. Make confession and read with a praying spirit His rich word.
Start the day with God.
Give the top of the day to Christ.

We are tempted because we are undernourished and hungry.
Instead of struggling with sins we must learn to enjoy the Lord's refreshing and sweet presence.

I would not see you "struggling" but let the Lord fight for you.
I would not see you struggling but learning to flee into the Spirit of Christ.
Let Him handle tempatation.

If YOU sruggle it will only make you proud and ready to fall the next time.
A prayer: "Lord Jesus, I refuse to struggle with this temptation. Lord Jesus YOU'RE in me. Lord YOU handle it."

I don't know if you are a Christian. But waiting until the moment of the heat of temptation to struggle is not effective.
The best advice I can offer is to build up a habit, to START your day with the Lord Jesus.

Save yourself a few wasted decades. Learn to start the day with the Lord Jesus, each day.
If you can only start with three minutes, then do three minutes.
When you realize the enjoyment of giving the top of the day to God you may wish to extend the time longer.

Marriage, dear seeking one, requires self control in the Holy Spirit.

Carl Emerson · Jul 29, 2023

Sounds like you might have a lust problem...

trophy33 · Jul 29, 2023

Tyler52 said:
So, what does that look like

Fitness is a journey that will require your own time investment into studying, experimenting and listening to people who are experts in their fields.

But simplified to few principles - live as our ancestors lived. Eat what they ate, sleep as they slept. You may start with simple ketogenic diets, whole foods, circadian rhythm... and also with some fasting from time to time. Keep inflammation low. Keep notes about what food or lifestyle makes your problems worse and what makes it better.

Fill your mind with other things instead of women. Do not idolize them, nor their bodies. Deal with possible childhood traumas you may have. Examine yourself and find what are the causes of your problems.

Also, do not feed your sexual desires, do not add oil to the fire. Do not make them your habit. The more you will build your life around it, the more it will have power over you.

But the details of this journey are on you, its a continuous process of working on yourself, not "one thing to do".

Edit: English

oikonomia · Jul 29, 2023

Carl Emerson said:
Sounds like you might have a lust problem...

You don't know the half of it.

Carl Emerson · Jul 29, 2023

oikonomia said:
You don't know the half of it.

Can you elaborate - do you know the OP ?

RileyG · Jul 29, 2023

Pray the psalms.

Tyler52 · Jul 29, 2023

oikonomia said:
This is a big subject not remedied in a few posts.
But if you are engaged you ought to realize the without self-control married life will be difficult.

If you want a happy and healthy marriage start to look to the Lord Jesus for self control now.

Start your day with a time in the Bible and prayer. Make confession and read with a praying spirit His rich word.
Start the day with God.
Give the top of the day to Christ.

We are tempted because we are undernourished and hungry.
Instead of struggling with sins we must learn to enjoy the Lord's refreshing and sweet presence.

I would not see you "struggling" but let the Lord fight for you.
I would not see you struggling but learning to flee into the Spirit of Christ.
Let Him handle tempatation.

If YOU sruggle it will only make you proud and ready to fall the next time.
A prayer: "Lord Jesus, I refuse to struggle with this temptation. Lord Jesus YOU'RE in me. Lord YOU handle it."

I don't know if you are a Christian. But waiting until the moment of the heat of temptation to struggle is not effective.
The best advice I can offer is to build up a habit, to START your day with the Lord Jesus.

Save yourself a few wasted decades. Learn to start the day with the Lord Jesus, each day.
If you can only start with three minutes, then do three minutes.
When you realize the enjoyment of giving the top of the day to God you may wish to extend the time longer.

Marriage, dear seeking one, requires self control in the Holy Spirit.

I am a Christian, thank you

Tyler52 · Jul 29, 2023

myst33 said:
Fitness is a journey that will require your own time investment into studying, experimenting and listening to people who are experts in their fields.

But simplified to few principles - live as our ancestors lived. Eat what they ate, sleep as they slept. You may start with simple ketogenic diets, whole foods, circadian rhythm... and also with some fasting from time to time. Keep inflammation low. Make notes what food or lifestyle makes your problems worse and what makes it better.

Fill your mind with other things instead of women. Do not idolize them, nor their bodies. Deal with possible childhood traumas you may have. Examine yourself and find what are the causes of your problems.

Also, do not feed your sexual desires, do not add oil to the fire. Do not make them your habit. The more you will build your life around it, the more it will have power over you.

But the details of this journey are on you, its a continuous process of working on yourself, not "one thing to do".

Gotcha, what do you mean by inflammation? And how do you think our ancestors slept? Also, what do you mean by circadian rhythm? Thank you for your advice.

oikonomia · Jul 29, 2023

Carl Emerson said:
Can you elaborate - do you know the OP ?

The OP sounded like a young person. I am over 70.
I also am happily married for about 46 years.
I came out of the loose and licentious 1960s, a child of that degraded age.

I have passed through many things of what I would say is typical human life in the US.

My boast is in Jesus Christ whose grace is made perfect in our weakness.
My boast is that weakness of one kind or another drives us into Christ.

Being made desperate by some "thorn" in the flesh of one kind or another
we learn who the Overcomer really is, the Lord Jesus. And our victory rests in Him completely.

Some people have one thorn others have another.
Most of us have something or somethings which so compel us to lose ourselves in Christ,
That the day comes when we even thank Him. Were it not for that "thorn" we might not have gained Christ.

Paul speaks of the messenger of Satan which caused him such desperation.

. . . there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan, that he might buffet me, in order that I might not be exceedingly lifted up. Concerning this I entreated the Lord three times that it might depart from me.

And He has said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness. Most gladly therefore I will rather boast in my weaknesses that the power of Christ might tabernacle over me.

Therefore I am well pleased in weaknesses, in insults, in necessities, in persecutions and distresses, on behalf of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am powerful. (2 Cor. 12:7b-10)

The point is that what caused him so much anguish drove him into the powerful and all-sufficient grace of Christ to overcome.
And overcome he did, through Christ. Christ was the indwelling victorious One whom Paul learned to tap into.

So effective was the supply of grace to support and empower him, that he said he learned that when he is weak then he is powerful.
Ie. Jesus is proved powerful in him as the superabounding grace.
for when I am weak, then I am powerful. (2 Cor. 12:7b-10)

It matters little what kind of "thorn" we have - of one kind or another.
His power is made strong in our weakness. So we learn Christ and gain Christ.
For the Christ we gain, the Christ that is WROUGHT into our personality is the only valuable thing
we can carry out of this world into the next world.

oikonomia · Jul 29, 2023

RileyG said:
Pray the psalms.

AMEN to that. In fact pray the word of God.
The living word can save our souls.

Therefore putting away all filthiness and the abundance of malice,
receive in meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. (James 1:21)

This evening I did some praying over Romans 5:13-19.
Musing prayerfully over the word can save our souls.

As newborn babes, long for the guileless milk of the word in order that by it you may grow unto salvation,
If you have tasted that the Lord is good. ( 1 Pet. 2:2,3)

Jeremiah 15:16 - Your words were found and I ate them,
And Your word became to me
the gladness and joy of my heart,
for I am called by Your name, O Jehovah, God of hosts.

bèlla · Jul 29, 2023

Whatever we feed will grow. You have to pinpoint the things that stimulate. Thoughts, behaviors, images, songs, movies, situations, people and so on. Desiring your companion is natural. But it's difficult to abstain if engaging in other areas or exposing yourself to things that exacerbate want. It becomes an inferno.

You'll need a combination of prayer, fasting, discipline, support and accountability. Going it alone will be hard. You need others around you who've overcome the same. They'll pray for you and offer the accountability you lack.

You need well established boundaries on the things you consume. If you put a carrot in your face you'll want it. You'll have to deny yourself and the urge and replace it wholesome pursuits. It's akin to shutting down access to your person. The more windows and doors you have open the more you'll wrestle with temptation.

Don't be afraid to share your struggles with your fiancee. Ask for her prayers and support. If certain attire makes you stumble tell the truth and ask her to wear something else.

Above all give the matter to God. It won't go away overnight. But if you keep praying, confessing, and filling your mind with holy things the stronghold will break. Pick up an audio bible or find one on YouTube and play it in the background. Especially when you sleep. It will bathe the environment in the word. You'll feel the difference pretty soon.

If you have things in your possession that support your challenges get rid of them. Cancel all accounts and delete all sites and pictures too. You need a clean slate. Keep shutting the doors and windows and you'll find the freedom you seek in time.

~bella

trophy33 · Jul 29, 2023

Tyler52 said:
Gotcha, what do you mean by inflammation? And how do you think our ancestors slept? Also, what do you mean by circadian rhythm? Thank you for your advice.

Inflammation - meaning chronic inflammation in body (frequently caused by bad diet)
Sleep - according to light, light and food are the main signals for our body to either sleep or be active, it relates to the term circadian rhythm
Circadian rhythm - our body has its inner clock (or, better said, many systems in our body have their inner clocks) and if you disrupt them (for example sleeping irregularly or in a wrong time, eating wrong food or in a wrong time etc), many problems and disbalances of the modern era arise.

Regarding circadian rhythm, look for the scientist/author Satchin Panda.

For diet and similar, you can check some medical doctors talking about keto diets (Ken Berry, Paul Saladino, Eric Westman, Anthony Chaffee). Also Robert Lustig and Sally Norton have important insights.

If keto diet is not for you, you may check more "standard" views about diet of Dr. Brad Stanfield or the channel "Nutrition made simple".

Regarding neuroscience, biochemistry and other similar topics, you can check Dr. Andrew Huberman.

SeventhFisherofMen · Jul 29, 2023

Tyler52 said:
I’m struggling with sexual temptation. I’m engaged but have 9months to go. I don’t know how to fight it. I wan t it so bad that it makes me mad. If anyone has any advice then please tell me. Please pray for me.

What helps me to overcome is to view myself swimming in the ocean completely submerged, and swimming past kelp which represents the lust whatever it may be, and getting past it. Once i'm past it i'm home free in clean water with sun rays shining into the water.

I keep telling myself "just get past it"

When you look at life and everything it has without the lust in the way suddenly all of the common problems in life seem so small, almost pathetic.

For example; the way some people dress like at the beach or advertisements or the way some people are flirty or make their whole identity about the next fling or relationship suddenly seems so small with lust out of the way. Suddenly i can think clearer and being solo with Christ doesn't feel so bad.

Also know there is a consequence to sin so just take it one day at a time one week at a time and one month at a time. You'll get there. If it is still an issue consider praying about possibly getting married legally before hand with a pastor and submitting your stuff to court and then still having the actual wedding on the planned date just now you are legally in God's eyes and the courts eyes married. That's what i did when i got married you go to court schedule a day pay a fee and then get a pastor I even found one on Craigslist to do the wedding got a friend to be the witness and everything. It can be done.

Tyler52 · Jul 30, 2023

SeventhFisherofMen said:
What helps me to overcome is to view myself swimming in the ocean completely submerged, and swimming past kelp which represents the lust whatever it may be, and getting past it. Once i'm past it i'm home free in clean water with sun rays shining into the water.

I keep telling myself "just get past it"

When you look at life and everything it has without the lust in the way suddenly all of the common problems in life seem so small, almost pathetic.

For example; the way some people dress like at the beach or advertisements or the way some people are flirty or make their whole identity about the next fling or relationship suddenly seems so small with lust out of the way. Suddenly i can think clearer and being solo with Christ doesn't feel so bad.

Also know there is a consequence to sin so just take it one day at a time one week at a time and one month at a time. You'll get there. If it is still an issue consider praying about possibly getting married legally before hand with a pastor and submitting your stuff to court and then still having the actual wedding on the planned date just now you are legally in God's eyes and the courts eyes married. That's what i did when i got married you go to court schedule a day pay a fee and then get a pastor I even found one on Craigslist to do the wedding got a friend to be the witness and everything. It can be done.

Thank you, but getting a civil union first isn’t what she wants. I do want to get married, but don’t want to do that to her and feel bad about considering it. She also said that God told her to wait until next May, which is why we have the wedding scheduled then.

Tyler52 · Jul 30, 2023

myst33 said:
Inflammation - meaning chronic inflammation in body (frequently caused by bad diet)
Sleep - according to light, light and food are the main signals for our body to either sleep or be active, it relates to the term circadian rhythm
Circadian rhythm - our body has its inner clock (or, better said, many systems in our body have their inner clocks) and if you disrupt them (for example sleeping irregularly or in a wrong time, eating wrong food or in a wrong time etc), many problems and disbalances of the modern era arise.

Regarding circadian rhythm, look for the scientist/author Satchin Panda.

For diet and similar, you can check some medical doctors talking about keto diets (Ken Berry, Paul Saladino, Eric Westman, Anthony Chaffee). Also Robert Lustig and Sally Norton have important insights.

If keto diet is not for you, you may check more "standard" views about diet of Dr. Brad Stanfield or the channel "Nutrition made simple".

Regarding neuroscience, biochemistry and other similar topics, you can check Dr. Andrew Huberman.

Thank you

How can I beat sexual temptation

Baptist

Well-Known Member

Baptist

Well-Known Member

Baptist

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

Veteran

Baptist

Baptist

Well-Known Member

Well-Known Member

❤️

Well-Known Member

You cannot fool Jesus

Baptist

Baptist

Similar threads