I have been battling several issues during my whole life, mainly abusive relationships, destructive behavior, eating disorder(s), loneliness, depression, anxiety - what have you. As a result, I found myself more or less tangled up in a web of lies and fake stories I tell/told myself and others, in order to seem better, seem well, seem healthy, and to feel, or at least seem, less lonely. The realization that I want and NEED to change, that I need to seek forgiveness to be able to start over and live in a righteous way, struck me more or less instantaneously just a couple of weeks ago.
The other day, I asked for God's help, begged him to show himself and rid me of doubt and lead the way on my journey onward. The same night I had an amazing experience while I was sleeping, which I still cannot explain. A light came "smashing" against me, as if I was in a car accident, but instead of reacting in the most natural way and try to protect myself, put my hands up and cover my face, I embraced it. The light came towards me with incredible speed and I embraced the explosion in a millisecond. Then I woke up.
I have since then felt comforted, calmer, but also massively confused. Could it have been God? Is there a reasonable, or at least understandable, explanation?
I would appreciate hearing more experienced believers' thoughts on this, and I am also curious to hear about other people's similar experiences.
Love,
L
The other day, I asked for God's help, begged him to show himself and rid me of doubt and lead the way on my journey onward. The same night I had an amazing experience while I was sleeping, which I still cannot explain. A light came "smashing" against me, as if I was in a car accident, but instead of reacting in the most natural way and try to protect myself, put my hands up and cover my face, I embraced it. The light came towards me with incredible speed and I embraced the explosion in a millisecond. Then I woke up.
I have since then felt comforted, calmer, but also massively confused. Could it have been God? Is there a reasonable, or at least understandable, explanation?
I would appreciate hearing more experienced believers' thoughts on this, and I am also curious to hear about other people's similar experiences.
Love,
L
