I greatly appreciate your words and prayer. Thank you. But sometime you need more than a just have faith pep talk and "hang in there " , "don't give up" it'll be better one day in the future. Prolonged saddness (20 + years) can break a person. When there's more pain than joy, life becomes miserable.
I've heard countless sermons on how to get a response from God. Like the secret method to get prayers anwsered or you just have to praise more or pray more or give more offering, have more faith, have more patience, be stronger, go on a fast, be more grateful, do this-do that, never doubt, be perfect every second of every day never failing and then MAYBE it'll happen. But no promises.
When people came to Jesus to get healed, they weren't asking for strength or patience to deal with their affliction. They were asking for the peace that comes with having a problem removed from their lives. Nobody said help me be stronger or more patient in my sickness. They needed a tangible physical change in their situation. Not come sick-leave sick or come sick-learn to live with the sickness. It was please heal my sickness and not help me mentally cope with being sick. They came sick and left with health. I need a change in situation. A starving man needs a plate of food, not a "you'll have food someday... just be patient and learn to live with being hungry.
I've hurt for so long(years). I don't want one more second of sadness. I want to be free of sadness not learn to live with it. I already have years of experience living with it.
I want smiles and laughter for me and my family. Please Heavenly Father, in Jesus name