Do Y'all Want Kids Too?

I’m not opposed. Sometimes I feel I should have more. I love being a mother and I’m good at it. We could have several and I wouldn’t complain.

~bella

I'm still open to having biological kids, but the older I get the greater the age gap would need to be. Although there are women my age who can still get pregnant, it's rare. Finding a woman I like well enough to marry is a greater concern.

On the up-side, two incomes + no kids has its perks. We could live a great life together either way.


Speaking of being an uncle, my siblings all have children. There isn't much pressure for me to follow suit.

DragonFox91 said:

Seems like I'll age out of natural at this point.

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Age out? You're a man, you don't age out of having kids. You could have kids when you're 70, for Pete's sake! Unlikely, but not unheard of. Think of the women your age who are in your predicament. They actually could age out of having biological children. I have several friends who are my age and are extremely worried they'll never get a chance. Thankfully I'm not personally concerned with this aspect of life, but there are lots of women who are.

Male testosterone levels are lower than they were years ago. Many men under 40 are experiencing ED and related issues well before the time their grandfathers would.

Studies show that testosterone levels in men have been on the decline for decades.

Two major studies have confirmed the phenomenon, one in U.S. men and another in Danish men. In the U.S. study, the total testosterone levels measured in men’s blood dropped approximately 22% between 1987 and 2004.

Of course testosterone levels drop as men get older, but what makes the study shocking is that men today actually have less testosterone than men used to have at the same age."

.....

A study on a large sample of American men found that the average testosterone level has been dropping by as much as 1 percent per year. Testosterone levels lower naturally with age, but this study found that a 65-year-old man in 1987 had about 17 percent more testosterone than a 65- year-old man in 2004. This wasn't just limited to Americans either; a Danish study found similar results. Anecdotally, sex counselor Ian Kerner told CNN that he's noticed "an increasing number of young guys are complaining of sexual concerns, such as diminished libido and erectile problems, more commonly seen in older men."

~bella

If I had to guess why testosterone levels are lower, on average, I'd put my money on obesity. Over 1/3 of Americans are obese, some studies suggest close to 40%, and many more Americans are overweight.


Obesity: Unhealthy and unmanly - Harvard Health

Obesity lowers testosterone levels. For example, a 2007 study of 1,667 men ages 40 and above found that each one-point increase in BMI was associated with a 2% decrease in testosterone. In addition, a 2008 study of 1,862 men ages 30 and above found that waist circumference was an even stronger predictor of low testosterone levels than BMI. A four-inch increase in waist size increased a man's odds of having a low testosterone level by 75%; for comparison, 10 years of aging increased the odds by only 36%. All in all, waist circumference was the strongest single predictor of developing symptoms of testosterone deficiency. And if you doubt these two American studies, just consider Australian research that found almost one in every seven obese men could benefit from testosterone replacement, a rate more than four times higher than in nonobese men.

DragonFox91 said:

Daydreaming at work...(Bad!)

I know a lot of you guys & gals dream of a partner & marriage, but do y'all want kids too? I used to not, I guess I just couldn't picture myself w/ them, but as I get older, and more mature I suppose, I get more open to it. Not sure about babies & young kids, but older, like elementary & up, I think about. I'm told babies & young kids are easier & I got it backwards, but that's not always the case. Some kids are easier then others. A lot is influenced by the parenting too, how they raise the child, & the parents' attitude. If I'm to have a woman, & she'd like children too, I'd like to adopt at least one of our kids. I think about that too. Adoption is on my heart.

So what do you think? I figured since there's so many threads on dating & marriage and what not in this Singles section, a thread on children is a must.

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After turning 40, I decided I'd go child-free for the rest of my life. We even had to end a dating situation with a woman over 40 that wanted kids.

Though, I'd prefer to date a woman without kids, I've been running into women over 40 that have no kids, that desire them...or people having kids later in life. I'd much prefer to date a single parent that had kids at least high school aged or even in college.

Some of my pals have had big litters.

DragonFox91 said:

I think it's b/c men don't do activities that stimulate testosterone.
It's not that they're obese, it's that I think exercise stimulates testosterone production, & since they're not exercising, they're not making as much as they probably can.

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I think this is definitely a major cause of the loss of testosterone. But another thing I can think of is birth control. All the estrogen, estradiol and progesterone that women take goes back into the water supply, doesn't get filtered out (because hormones are relatively tiny molecules) and the men drink the water and it lowers their testosterone. (Insert "gay frogs" joke here).

Right, but at 70 am I really going to be marrying a girl who hasn't aged out? The clock is ticking because I'll age out of being able to marry a girl who hasn't aged out. Good news is, I should be good for another decade, I think.

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That's why I said it was unlikely, but not unheard of. A 70 y/o woman conceiving and bearing a child to term naturally is unheard of. Realistically, I think you have till you're about 60 to have a child. At 60, you could still marry a 40 y/o relatively easily. Not that this is a great scenario, mind you. But it's at least possible, unlike if you were a woman. Count your blessings.

DragonFox91 said:

There's no way. It'd have to get filtered out. Could it be chemicals they put in meat or something? I hear a lot of that vegan meat has a bunch of estrogen in it (not sure how much of that is propaganda tho), but maybe they put a lot of chemicals in natural meat & stuff too?

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100% yes way. You'd be shocked at the amount of industrial chemicals and small molecules that make their way into drinking water. The filtering processes they use just aren't enough to get it all out. I'd say most of it is removed, but there's still a lot left behind. You'd have to distill the water to actually remove everything, but that would be prohibitively expensive.

Meat shouldn't have any chemicals in it further than what the animal was fed. I know in the States they pump the animals full of antibiotics and hormones, but Canada is a lot more wary of doing that. Hormones to increase milk production aren't permitted to be given to dairy cattle, for example.

Isaiah 2:22 said:

Meat shouldn't have any chemicals in it further than what the animal was fed. I know in the States they pump the animals full of antibiotics and hormones, but Canada is a lot more wary of doing that. Hormones to increase milk production aren't permitted to be given to dairy cattle, for example.

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I'd give cows 2CCs of Estrumate if I hadn't seen them "come on" - but even that was a synthetic prostaglandin. Oxytocin was used, usually if I had a difficult calving and needed to use the calving jack. But if their diet was on point, it was a rare occurrence anyway. I had a bottle of oxytocin sitting in the fridge for over a year once.

The only antibiotic I know of that didn't require a withdrawal period was Naxcel - the rest had ridiculously long withdraw periods. And by the time I packed in the job, ALL of the gen 3 antibiotics had been banned (the ones that worked, annoyingly.)

I can only speak for the UK, but we're tested constantly on just about everything. I used to have Food Standards turn up randomly, to rifle through my medicine cupboard and read my diary. On one visit, I had ONE vial with 33ml unaccounted for and he questioned me about it.

It was ALL in the name of avoiding even TRACE amounts of hormone or antibiotic ending up in the end product. I can vouch for it, I was there. And was forced to do the paper work.

ReesePiece23 said:

I'd give cows 2CCs of Estrumate if I hadn't seen them "come on" - but even that was a synthetic prostaglandin. Oxytocin was used, usually if I had a difficult calving and needed to use the calving jack. But if their diet was on point, it was a rare occurrence anyway. I had a bottle of oxytocin sitting in the fridge for over a year once.

The only antibiotic I know of that didn't require a withdrawal period was Naxcel - the rest had ridiculously long withdraw periods. And by the time I packed in the job, ALL of the gen 3 antibiotics had been banned (the ones that worked, annoyingly.)

I can only speak for the UK, but we're tested constantly on just about everything. I used to have Food Standards turn up randomly, to rifle through my medicine cupboard and read my diary. On one visit, I had ONE vial with 33ml unaccounted for and he questioned me about it.

It was ALL in the name of avoiding even TRACE amounts of hormone or antibiotic ending up in the end product. I can vouch for it, I was there. And was forced to do the paper work.

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This was super informative. Gave me flashbacks to my farm animal anatomy and physiology course at uni. I think Canada and the UK are similar in terms of stringency with this sort of thing. Though the UK is probably even more strict. Do you have supply management/a quota system for milk as well?

DragonFox91 said:

Well right, but is the chemicals they're putting into it (& therefore men eating) affecting testosterone levels?

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For the meat? Or water? If the former, no. The sorts of things they feed animals are unlikely to affect the meat in such a way as to change testosterone levels in men. If the latter, absolutely yes. Runoff from agriculture/horticulture is a big problem, especially in the Great Lakes region. Have you heard of algal bloom? The runoff that causes it makes its way into drinking water as well.

Interesting about Canada. I had a friend who was big into stuff like that. I bet you guys still import some meat tho, no? (not just from US but in general)

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Yes. We import a lot of beef from the States. Pork and poultry is mostly exported, though. As is lamb. But milk and eggs cannot be imported from foreign countries as they are supply managed (amid much whining from American farmers).

Isaiah 2:22 said:

This was super informative. Gave me flashbacks to my farm animal anatomy and physiology course at uni. I think Canada and the UK are similar in terms of stringency with this sort of thing. Though the UK is probably even more strict. Do you have supply management/a quota system for milk as well?

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I was fortunate enough to work on a very simple system - my contract was with Arla who didn't ask for anything specific (just no antibiotics in the tank). Had I'd been contracted to a supermarket it would have meant year round calving and 'x amount' per week. I operated an autumn block, so I'd peak in the winter and drop off in the spring. Which suited me. By summer, I was able to go to the west end for lunch everyday.

But we were fiercely strict, on antibiotics especially. I had an antibiotic testing kit sitting around just in case I ever made a mistake. The danger was with dry cows coming back into milk. If your lists weren't spot on (i.e. which cow had what dry cow therapy and when) then the risk of a milk failure went from somewhat dangerous to almost certain.

DragonFox91 said:

I don't understand half of that, Reese

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Never let anyone tell you that a farmer is stupid. Veterinary students at university level would come to us farmers for advice.

It's all still up there, I'll never forget how to set up a farm and manage it. It's like learning to ride a bike.

ReesePiece23 said:

I was fortunate enough to work on a very simple system - my contract was with Arla who didn't ask for anything specific (just no antibiotics in the tank). Had I'd been contracted to a supermarket it would have meant year round calving and 'x amount' per week. I operated an autumn block, so I'd peak in the winter and drop off in the spring. Which suited me. By summer, I was able to go to the west end for lunch everyday.

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Year-round calving? *shudders* I've never even worked in the dairy industry, but the very thought makes me break out in a cold sweat. lol