How Do You Feel When Being Chastened?

"Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous" (in Hebrews 12:11)

I can be grieved. I can feel very awkward, because I know I can not get myself to be how He wants and do what He wants. And I do not control Him.

ChristServant said:

1My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor detest His correction; 12For whom the LORD loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.

It does work on most.

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Revelation 3:19

As many as I might love, I rebuke and discipline; therefore be zealous and repent.

Leads us to repent (turn away from sin) .... so that is a good.

We are blessed to be chastened, for He prepare us for heavenly glory.

ChristServant said:

1My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor detest His correction; 12For whom the LORD loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.

It does work on most.

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I think I've been chastened enough not to dread it as much as be determined to learn from it. It is uncomfortable but leads to good things. Also, it can be confusing to recognize authentic chastisement from other trials. I'm learning not to guess what is going on as much as trust the process.

ChristServant said:

1My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor detest His correction; 12For whom the LORD loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.

It does work on most.

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I wanted to add I'm so glad you posted this verse. We all have to take our licks at times. This aspect of our walk with Christ seems overlooked a lot. It is just a part of being human with a sinful nature and having a holy loving God. Amen.

HappyHope said:

I think I've been chastened enough not to dread it as much as be determined to learn from it. It is uncomfortable but leads to good things. Also, it can be confusing to recognize authentic chastisement from other trials. I'm learning not to guess what is going on as much as trust the process.

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Don’t be confused !
Just consider this when you are suffering what is right or for righteousness’sake, that means you are suffering for Christ.
Consider you suffering for what is wrong, you are on the wrong side and repent and get back to the Lord’s loving side.
When you don’t know whether you are suffering for what is right and wrong, just ask the Lord to lead you aright.
When you are suffering, consider also this that He give you His yoke; Have you received it ?; when you have, you know that He is suffering with you and that you are not alone bearing this burden.

SANTOSO said:

Don’t be confused !
Just consider this when you are suffering what is right or for righteousness’sake, that means you are suffering for Christ.
Consider you suffering for what is wrong, you are on the wrong side and repent and get back to the Lord’s loving side.
When you don’t know whether you are suffering for what is right and wrong, just ask the Lord to lead you aright.
When you are suffering, consider also this that He give you His yoke; Have you received it ?; when you have, you know that He is suffering with you and that you are not alone bearing this burden.

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Yep, trust the process whatever is going down. I will say it can easy at times to recognize some chastising because there are usually warnings. Those conscious pings along the lines of "check yourself" "you know better" "you don't want to go that way" maybe some "really?" up in there too-- often with Scripture surfacing that brings conviction.

At the same time, you gotta be careful when someone comes at you. I was once accused by a church "friend" of being chastened for the sins of a relative on another continent. I loved that church lady but she was off. I had already warned my overseas relative about their path. I was suffering but had no control over that situation.

Overall, I try not too look too closing at reasons now. That stuff will drive you crazy. I love what you said about suffering for righteousness's sake. It is all a growth process with its awkwardness and its blessings.

HappyHope said:

Yep, trust the process whatever is going down. I will say it can easy at times to recognize some chastising because there are usually warnings. Those conscious pings along the lines of "check yourself" "you know better" "you don't want to go that way" maybe some "really?" up in there too-- often with Scripture surfacing that brings conviction.

At the same time, you gotta be careful when someone comes at you. I was once accused by a church "friend" of being chastened for the sins of a relative on another continent. I loved that church lady but she was off. I had already warned my overseas relative about their path. I was suffering but had no control over that situation.

Overall, I try not too look too closing at reasons now. That stuff will drive you crazy. I love what you said about suffering for righteousness's sake. It is all a growth process with its awkwardness and its blessings.

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Don’t trust the process. Trust Jesus. Well, you are not alone. The Lord send you a Helper, the Holy Spirit to comfort you with His love.
When you are accused doing what is right, just hide yourself with Christ in God. Let Him be your vindicator . Because He said whoever loves Me, I will rescue. Because I know His name, He will protect me.

SANTOSO said:

Don’t trust the process. Trust Jesus. Well, you are not alone. The Lord send you a Helper, the Holy Spirit to comfort you with His love.
When you are accused doing what is right, just hide yourself with Christ in God. Let Him be your vindicator . Because He said whoever loves Me, I will rescue. Because I know His name, He will protect me.

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I get you. Here is a good verse for the overall topic of our fragile righteousness and the Lord's chastisement:

Psalm 103:13-14 ESV
As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.

I feel grieved and punished and overwhelmed- it hurts. But I work at having joy in it. It always feels like having mental health issues and like I gotta get outa this place. Now it’s not so bad it’s endurable. But I have thought some pretty terrible things and treated the Lord way bad worse than any person in my lifetime.
I just don’t understand sometimes,but it happens from disobedience in my case. I don’t exactly feel loved and I’m slow but I see Him working and it getting better overall.

Unqualified said:

I feel grieved and punished and overwhelmed- it hurts. But I work at having joy in it. It always feels like having mental health issues and like I gotta get outa this place. Now it’s not so bad it’s endurable. But I have thought some pretty terrible things and treated the Lord way bad worse than any person in my lifetime.
I just don’t understand sometimes,but it happens from disobedience in my case. I don’t exactly feel loved and I’m slow but I see Him working and it getting better overall.

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When you feel grieved and punished and overwhelmed, you are in spiritual dry place.
When you are filled with the fountain of living water, you will not be dry. That is why Jesus stand up and cried out : Let those are thirsty, come to me and drink.

When it always feels like having mental health issues, you have not set your mind on the things of the Spirit; when you have, you will have life and peace.

When you have thought some pretty terrible things and treated the Lord way bad worse than any person in your lifetime, just repent because the Lord is kind and forgiving and full of grace to those who call on Him.

When you don’t exactly feel loved, it is because you have not yet trusted in the steadfast love of the Lord.

As it is written:
Many are the sorrows of the wicked, but steadfast love SURROUNDS THE ONE WHO TRUSTS IN THE LORD. -Psalms 32:10

So begin with trusting in the steadfast love of the Lord everyday then that steadfast of the Lord will surround you all the days of your life.

Unqualified said:

I feel grieved and punished and overwhelmed- it hurts. But I work at having joy in it. It always feels like having mental health issues and like I gotta get outa this place. Now it’s not so bad it’s endurable. But I have thought some pretty terrible things and treated the Lord way bad worse than any person in my lifetime.
I just don’t understand sometimes,but it happens from disobedience in my case. I don’t exactly feel loved and I’m slow but I see Him working and it getting better overall.

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Ah, I dont know that you are being chastened. It sounds like something else. Please have confidence in your stand in Christ. Self-condemnation has a hard time holding to hope. The not feeling loved part concerns me. It sounds a bit like spiritual warfare though I'm no expert.

I'm glad you are looking for joy in your trial. If you have a pet sin eating at you, that might play a part. And maybe a bit more confidence in the Lord's goodness would ease your mind and bring peace.

There was one area of my life once I knew I crossed the line too many times. I kept brushing it off and making excuses. I'd been warned by the Holy Spirit more than once. I was a bit out of control there. I still had a lot of great things going on in my life and my walk with Christ but that dark knot I let loose habitually and didnt properly address it as I knew to do.

My last strike out had me drop to my knees. And I just waited because I knew something was coming. Not a presence but a punishment. I could feel it. Sure enough that evening I got very very sick. I vomited all night long after my stomach was completely empty. Thought I might die at the most feverish point. But nope. I was given more chances to check myself. Felt much better the next day. Whirlwind illness. Still I knew the whole time I was loved. No question.

The Lord was way too up in my business to think I wasnt part of his family. It was a loving swat so to speak. Or maybe this is just how the Lord deals with me? Maybe he has to get my attention through extreme means, lol.

If you doubt God's love, it may not be what you think. I have reason to believe the Lord doesnt spare the rod everytime no matter how many hives break out on popular theologians today at the implication the New Testament isn’t short on accountability. Trending theories on God do not change God. I’ll stop ranting now.

But your case doesnt seem to be punishment. I pray you get it sorted. One of my favorite things to do when I was a lonely single airman overseas and far from loved ones was to read Gods promises in the Bible and watch for them to come true. That is an empowering way to gain confidence in your Christian identity.
Too many people are self condemning. We can examine ourselves but we have no right to think the Lord doesnt love us anymore. Hang in there. I'm glad you feel things might be getting better. You are so loved! You dont have enough sin to undo what Christ did for you.

Roman's 15:13 ESV "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope."

Thank You @SANTOSO and @HappyHope . I shouldn’t have vented all my feelings. I do spiritual warfare constantly... and I drink often, it does feel ‘grievous’ at times... I am just not perfect but live in repentance. But I appreciate the words that give life from both of you and the encouragement. Sounds like God and the scriptures are all wrapped up in your good feelings but my life- I just need to be more faithful with certain things.

Unqualified said:

Thank You @SANTOSO and @HappyHope . I shouldn’t have vented all my feelings. I do spiritual warfare constantly... and I drink often, it does feel ‘grievous’ at times... I am just not perfect but live in repentance. But I appreciate the words that give life from both of you and the encouragement. Sounds like God and the scriptures are all wrapped up in your good feelings but my life- I just need to be more faithful with certain things.

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For the enemy has pursued my soul; he has crushed my life to the ground; he has made me sit in darkness like those long dead. -Psalms 143:3
Therefore my spirit faints within me; my heart within me is appalled. -Psalms 143:4

If you feel grievous at times, you find your spirit faints within you; pray like David in Psalms 143

God Bless You!

God bless you, too

Unqualified said:

Thank You @SANTOSO and @HappyHope . I shouldn’t have vented all my feelings. I do spiritual warfare constantly... and I drink often, it does feel ‘grievous’ at times... I am just not perfect but live in repentance. But I appreciate the words that give life from both of you and the encouragement. Sounds like God and the scriptures are all wrapped up in your good feelings but my life- I just need to be more faithful with certain things.

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I heard a radio sermon yesterday. The pastor questioned the order of how faithfulness develops. He made interesting statements about how obedience does not proceed the right level of motivational desire to be faithful as much as building up the right amount of desire to be faithful leads to obedience. There may be something to this. Not sure how convinced I am but I do know a certain amount of messiness tends to fuel a desire to improve. Saying a prayer for your situation!

HappyHope said:

I heard a radio sermon yesterday. The pastor questioned the order of how faithfulness develops. He made interesting statements about how obedience does not proceed the right level of motivational desire to be faithful as much as building up the right amount of desire to be faithful leads to obedience. There may be something to this. Not sure how convinced I am but I do know a certain amount of messiness tends to fuel a desire to improve. Saying a prayer for your situation!

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There is no need for certain amount of messiness, then that person tends to be obedience or faithful.

Do you remember when Jesus called Nathanael? What Jesus spoke of his life :
Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward him and said of him, "Behold, an Israelite indeed, in whom there is no deceit!"

There is no deceit in Nathanael’s life ; he is not in a certain amount of mess, yet he obeys Jesus and be faithful to Him.

Many people lived in a messed up life because they relied on their strength to walk in obedience and be faithful.

If they relied on God’s strength to walk in obedience and be faithful, let me ask you who work mightily in their life ; so who the praise and glory belongs to ? His Spirit who works mightily. Why? because of His steadfast love that He works mightily in them.

As we have heard:
For I said, "Steadfast love will be built up forever; in the heavens You will establish your faithfulness." -Psalms 89:2

Whose steadfast love will be built up forever, that is, our steadfast love that is built up forever ; by who ? by God who is steadfast love.

Who is going to heavens? We who love the Lord. Who establish our faithfulness? The Lord who love us.