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Lost4words · Feb 28, 2019

Maybe, take time out of the relationship so that you can pray and seek answers to your questions.

Just let your boyfriend know what is going on in your head and heart. If he truly loves you he will understand and wait.

Dont be too eager to end it. Also, remember that the devil loves to intervene where Christians are close to God. And, especially when he sees the two of you being excellent Christians!

God bless you both

HoneyBee · Feb 28, 2019

First, I would advise that you just take a moment to breathe and slow down. You seem very eager to make a decision, and yet I think it might be unwise to make a quick decision like that.

I agree with Lost4words. You should maybe take a little break to pray more about this and seek more clarity before making a decision. God won't abandon you for taking your time, I can assure you of that. But yeah, just keep praying about it and maybe talk to a pastor or someone like that if you feel called to do so.

Albion · Feb 28, 2019

I don't see any reason to think that your bf has anything to do with the feelings you described--or that God is calling you to do anything one way or the other concerning your relationship with the bf.

But you are nevertheless ill at ease.

It is possible that you might help yourself by working on that problem area without stipulating to yourself that it involves your boyfriend (or any boyfriend, for that matter).

Aldebaran · Feb 28, 2019

rosevs said:
I have had a boyfriend for almost a year and a half now. Not quite, but almost. He is my best friend. We do just about everything together.
I am seventeen, and he just turned eighteen. He is immature, but he is a God-fearing Christian. Both of us have been Christian for about a year now... so I suppose we are both still figuring things out. That is why I am so thankful for this forum.

Anyways. I think I am being called to break up with him. BUT I have no clue if this is just me being stupid or if it actually God calling me. I cannot go to the Bible for answers. I would understand if my boyfriend was causing us to stumble, was not Christian, etc., but he is Christian! And every time we have "stumbled" we both repent together and move on and try to not to it again. So that is not the issue.

It is just a sheer feeling. That is all. Before I felt that way, I was happy with him. I mean, we both thought we were the ones for each other. We are both Christian, we talk about God, pray together, go to church together, and I know he cares for me, and he respects the physical boundaries we need to have. But I am growing unhappy because I am afraid that I am not in God's will (or what is making God happy). I am so afraid, and so attached to my boyfriend because he is my best friend.

I do not know what is happening or what to do. I am so lost and scared, and I am afraid God will turn his back on me if I do not hurry up and realize what he is saying. Everything feels so fuzzy. I already feel heartbroken inside and nothing has even happened. Please help.

When you have this feeling, are you identify what the feeling is? I mean, what does this feeling tell you is wrong with keeping this guy as your boyfriend if you're not doing anything wrong?

rosevs · Feb 28, 2019

Aldebaran said:
When you have this feeling, are you identify what the feeling is? I mean, what does this feeling tell you is wrong with keeping this guy as your boyfriend if you're not doing anything wrong?

See I do not know. I don't know. All I know is I feel as if God is telling me to end things. That is it. I am so confused because I have nothing to go by.

Albion · Feb 28, 2019

Unless you have some reason to think the relationship is sinful (and you say that this is not the case), I would dismiss that possibility. But as I said before, you still have those feelings.

My suggestion, therefore, was to get help or at least to approach the doubts without saying to yourself, needlessly, that either God or the boyfriend are part of it. That way whatever actually is the problem might become clearer and you will have a better chance of solving it.

Aldebaran · Feb 28, 2019

rosevs said:
See I do not know. I don't know. All I know is I feel as if God is telling me to end things. That is it. I am so confused because I have nothing to go by.

Well, one thing I could suggest is to tell your bf about this. Since he's a Christian as well, I'm sure he will be understanding. Then suggest that you "take a break" from your bf/gf relationship for a little while. Maybe a month or so. See how you both feel about it. You can then see if you felt that you have done the right thing. If so, make it permanent. Perhaps God wants it to only be temporary to give you perspective.

Artra · Feb 28, 2019

rosevs said:
I have had a boyfriend for almost a year and a half now. Not quite, but almost. He is my best friend. We do just about everything together.
I am seventeen, and he just turned eighteen. He is immature, but he is a God-fearing Christian. Both of us have been Christian for about a year now... so I suppose we are both still figuring things out. That is why I am so thankful for this forum.

Anyways. I think I am being called to break up with him. BUT I have no clue if this is just me being stupid or if it actually God calling me. I cannot go to the Bible for answers. I would understand if my boyfriend was causing us to stumble, was not Christian, etc., but he is Christian! And every time we have "stumbled" we both repent together and move on and try to not to it again. So that is not the issue.

It is just a sheer feeling. That is all. Before I felt that way, I was happy with him. I mean, we both thought we were the ones for each other. We are both Christian, we talk about God, pray together, go to church together, and I know he cares for me, and he respects the physical boundaries we need to have. But I am growing unhappy because I am afraid that I am not in God's will (or what is making God happy). I am so afraid, and so attached to my boyfriend because he is my best friend.

I do not know what is happening or what to do. I am so lost and scared, and I am afraid God will turn his back on me if I do not hurry up and realize what he is saying. Everything feels so fuzzy. I already feel heartbroken inside and nothing has even happened. Please help.

Always keep this in mind: as his girlfriend and best friend, you currently have a special influence on his Spirit, and how you act on this call will impact his own journey. However you go forward, keep his best interests as a high priority and never forget self-forgetfulness. God bless.

Edit: I also just want to say don't be too hard on yourself for feeling this way. You still care about him to ask for guidance here, and you are taking the feeling seriously, so you're on the right path. It will be okay no matter what happens.

david tyler · Feb 28, 2019

,ITS ALL GOOD,WORK ON IT AS YOU DO EVERYTHING AMEN

Sketcher · Feb 28, 2019

It takes more than a feeling to determine the will of God. Why would he tell you to break up?

rosevs · Feb 28, 2019

Sketcher said:
It takes more than a feeling to determine the will of God. Why would he tell you to break up?

I can’t say. I am very attached to my boyfriend. He’s really my one and only TRUE friend. I’d have a very, very hard time letting him go if I had to. I don’t know if God is trying to tell me to back off and stop relying on my boyfriend too much and rather rely on God. But I don’t know if that goes as far as breaking up.

Aldebaran · Mar 2, 2019

rosevs said:
I can’t say. I am very attached to my boyfriend. He’s really my one and only TRUE friend. I’d have a very, very hard time letting him go if I had to. I don’t know if God is trying to tell me to back off and stop relying on my boyfriend too much and rather rely on God. But I don’t know if that goes as far as breaking up.

Try "separating" as boyfriend/girlfriend for awhile and just be friends during that time and see how it works out.

Andrew77 · Mar 2, 2019

rosevs said:
I have had a boyfriend for almost a year and a half now. Not quite, but almost. He is my best friend. We do just about everything together.
I am seventeen, and he just turned eighteen. He is immature, but he is a God-fearing Christian. Both of us have been Christian for about a year now... so I suppose we are both still figuring things out. That is why I am so thankful for this forum.

Anyways. I think I am being called to break up with him. BUT I have no clue if this is just me being stupid or if it actually God calling me. I cannot go to the Bible for answers. I would understand if my boyfriend was causing us to stumble, was not Christian, etc., but he is Christian! And every time we have "stumbled" we both repent together and move on and try to not to it again. So that is not the issue.

It is just a sheer feeling. That is all. Before I felt that way, I was happy with him. I mean, we both thought we were the ones for each other. We are both Christian, we talk about God, pray together, go to church together, and I know he cares for me, and he respects the physical boundaries we need to have. But I am growing unhappy because I am afraid that I am not in God's will (or what is making God happy). I am so afraid, and so attached to my boyfriend because he is my best friend.

I do not know what is happening or what to do. I am so lost and scared, and I am afraid God will turn his back on me if I do not hurry up and realize what he is saying. Everything feels so fuzzy. I already feel heartbroken inside and nothing has even happened. Please help.

Sounds to me like this is an unhealthy relationship.

Him being Christian, doesn't mean it's a healthy relationship. If it was healthy, we wouldn't be talking about this right now.

So I think you should do exactly what you believe you should do. I would break up with him, and for the time being, focus on serving the Lord. Determine for yourself, if G-d is going to take care of you, his daughter. Do you believe that? Then you can trust him on this.

Yeah, it's sucks because you are wrapped up in this guy, and it's not going to be fun unwrapping yourself from this relationship.

But just from what you have written here, I think this is the right course of action.

Kenyon Ledford · Mar 2, 2019

Searching_for_God said:
First, I would advise that you just take a moment to breathe and slow down. You seem very eager to make a decision, and yet I think it might be unwise to make a quick decision like that.

I agree with Lost4words. You should maybe take a little break to pray more about this and seek more clarity before making a decision. God won't abandon you for taking your time, I can assure you of that. But yeah, just keep praying about it and maybe talk to a pastor or someone like that if you feel called to do so.

Yep.

Also, maybe Satan is trying to break up a good Christian partnership

this is not my name · Mar 3, 2019

get your heart right, and seek His will.

this is not my name · Mar 3, 2019

if you think God is calling you to do this, don't look to get out of it. don't do that. I did, and seriously regretted it. but if you are not sure, fast and pray.
seek His will.
I thought God was telling me to get out of a relationship, but resisted and resisted and resisted, turns out that God was right, and I knew He was right, and He proved Himself to be right. I found that the girl was an idol to me.

Endeavourer · Mar 3, 2019

What do you think of the information in this link?
Choosing the Right One to Marry - Letter #2 (Marriage Builders®,...

S.O.J.I.A. · Mar 3, 2019

define "stumbled"..

Dave-W · Mar 22, 2019

Kenyon Ledford said:
maybe Satan is trying to break up a good Christian partnership

I had the exact same thought.

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