So I've been with this girl for over a year and we set up from the beginning that we were willing to get married. We worked out that since she was a different denomination (orthodox) she would convert. I felt like I had a partner for life and I could tell her anything.
She told me early on that we wouldn't be kissing or officially dating as her parents wouldn't allow it. I was ok with it and ecstatic for our future together. Eventually her mom warmed up to me and okayed our dating and later kissing. Kissing her was by far the best experience of my entire life. Eventually though, she (my girlfriend) went to confession and her priest asked if we had kissed. He told her this was a grave sin and she must stop.
Not one to dwell on the past, I just accepted it and was ready to move on. After a few weeks though I started to get this sinking feeling at times when I used to kiss her. I googled around and found that it might be kind of like a physical addiction or inappropriate content addiction and it would eventually pass. When I kicked a serious inappropriate content habit a long time ago however, it only took a couple months for me to feel normal; but it's been about six months since I stopped kissing and nothing has improved.
I can't talk to her about it because she'd feel really bad and be stuck between a rock and a hard place. I don't even really want her to kiss me again, I just want this feeling to go away, it invades our relationship every time I'm with her. The only other time I've felt this way is when I was with my family and got lost in a mall at age six. Will this eventually go away on its own? Do I have to do anything? If it's just gonna last forever I'm okay with that because I love her, I just don't see anyone else on the internet talking about this and I don't know what is going on.
She told me early on that we wouldn't be kissing or officially dating as her parents wouldn't allow it. I was ok with it and ecstatic for our future together. Eventually her mom warmed up to me and okayed our dating and later kissing. Kissing her was by far the best experience of my entire life. Eventually though, she (my girlfriend) went to confession and her priest asked if we had kissed. He told her this was a grave sin and she must stop.
Not one to dwell on the past, I just accepted it and was ready to move on. After a few weeks though I started to get this sinking feeling at times when I used to kiss her. I googled around and found that it might be kind of like a physical addiction or inappropriate content addiction and it would eventually pass. When I kicked a serious inappropriate content habit a long time ago however, it only took a couple months for me to feel normal; but it's been about six months since I stopped kissing and nothing has improved.
I can't talk to her about it because she'd feel really bad and be stuck between a rock and a hard place. I don't even really want her to kiss me again, I just want this feeling to go away, it invades our relationship every time I'm with her. The only other time I've felt this way is when I was with my family and got lost in a mall at age six. Will this eventually go away on its own? Do I have to do anything? If it's just gonna last forever I'm okay with that because I love her, I just don't see anyone else on the internet talking about this and I don't know what is going on.
