The dangers of talking to little kids

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 28, 2017

I am a loner. The extent of my dealings with people are through the internet, and the very few friends that I have.

I do not talk to any of my neighbors, except for maybe a very few that I have known for years, and some that are just extremely outgoing. But other than that I mind my own business and keep to myself.

But every once in a while I come across really friendly kids that like to talk to me. This does not happen often, but it does happen.

Right now in my apartment building there two kids that always talk to me: a boy and a girl. I know the boys parents a little bit, but I am not friends with them. And the girl's parents I don't know at all. Her father would not his head at me when he sees me every once in awhile but I ignore it; I notice it but I don't respond.

This girl will politely make comments to me, and I think she even asked me if I liked her dress.

The point that I am making this is very very dangerous for me. Would I ever hurt a child? Of course not. But the parents don't know that. The last thing I need is the parents to come at me with a baseball bat.

I never smile. I am not friendly. I don't do anything to bring this on.

What would be the appropriate way to handle a very friendly child, and to tell him or her that they shouldn't be talking to you without hurting their feelings?

I have got to protect myself. I know that it says we are supposed to love our neighbors as ourselves, but I can't be friendly to a child that doesn't know me. That's not very smart. Most child offenses, like 94% of them, are done by men.

Again, will I ever hurt a child? Of course not. But I have to look at it through the parents eyes.

If your child is talking to a stranger, would you be very upset about that, even if it was your neighbor that you barely know?

Again I ask how do I handle this without offending anyone?

wayfarersoul1978 · Apr 28, 2017

Since you do not know parents keep your distance. However, I do not see talking to them as bad thing. Never have them come to your apartment and keep your distance. Maybe you need to get out more. I am loner too, we can talk on here. If you like.

JingshenBianxi · Apr 28, 2017

IAMABELIEVER1979 said:
I am a loner. The extent of my dealings with people are through the internet, and the very few friends that I have.

I do not talk to any of my neighbors, except for maybe a very few that I have known for years, and some that are just extremely outgoing. But other than that I mind my own business and keep to myself.

But every once in a while I come across really friendly kids that like to talk to me. This does not happen often, but it does happen.

Right now in my apartment building there two kids that always talk to me: a boy and a girl. I know the boys parents a little bit, but I am not friends with them. And the girl's parents I don't know at all. Her father would not his head at me when he sees me every once in awhile but I ignore it; I notice it but I don't respond.

This girl will politely make comments to me, and I think she even asked me if I liked her dress.

The point that I am making this is very very dangerous for me. Would I ever hurt a child? Of course not. But the parents don't know that. The last thing I need is the parents to come at me with a baseball bat.

I never smile. I am not friendly. I don't do anything to bring this on.

What would be the appropriate way to handle a very friendly child, and to tell him or her that they shouldn't be talking to you without hurting their feelings?

I have got to protect myself. I know that it says we are supposed to love our neighbors as ourselves, but I can't be friendly to a child that doesn't know me. That's not very smart. Most child offenses, like 94% of them, are done by men.

Again, will I ever hurt a child? Of course not. But I have to look at it through the parents eyes.

If your child is talking to a stranger, would you be very upset about that, even if it was your neighbor that you barely know?

Again I ask how do I handle this without offending anyone?

Man up and talk to the parents. Get to know them.

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 28, 2017

wayfarersoul1978 said:
Since you do not know parents keep your distance. However, I do not see talking to them as bad thing. Never have them come to your apartment and keep your distance. Maybe you need to get out more. I am loner too, we can talk on here. If you like.

Thank you so much for your advice. I think I would have to agree about keeping my distance.

If you would like to talk that's fine.

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 28, 2017

JingshenBianxi said:
Man up and talk to the parents. Get to know them.

That would make me nervous.

wayfarersoul1978 · Apr 28, 2017

IAMABELIEVER1979 said:
That would make me nervous.

He could come of creepy. Just keep your distance, if know the parents and we're friends it be different,

Victory-N-Christ · Apr 28, 2017

I don't talk to kids unless I know their parents or if they're my family members.Don't set yourself up for potential trouble. Just nicely tell the kids to scram ...or ignore them completely. That's what I'd do.

Jesus' Girl · Apr 28, 2017

Shame the world is like this...
You can be polite but not rude. Talk if they talk to you, smile if they smile. But definitely don't talk first.

ImAllLikeOkWaitWat · Apr 28, 2017

I'd ignore them or give short answers and stay focused on what it is I'm doing. I don't think its a problem to talk to them as long as you are walking to wherever you are going, I wouldn't stop and talk to them though, but I'll answer whatever question they have(and they do have a lot) while walking past them to where I'm trying to go. I guess it could be annoying if you were in a situation where you were in a line or something and some kid is yapping your ear off but usually they have their parents with them so its okay to talk to them if necessary.

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 29, 2017

Jesus' Girl said:
Shame the world is like this...
You can be polite but not rude. Talk if they talk to you, smile if they smile. But definitely don't talk first.

It is a shame. I love being a man, but I hate the fact that my gender is one that people have to look out for when they are around sometimes. But I do get why.

I mean a woman can talk to anyone just fine. I have to be careful because I am a man.

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 29, 2017

ImAllLikeOkWaitWhat said:
I'd ignore them or give short answers and stay focused on what it is I'm doing. I don't think its a problem to talk to them as long as you are walking to wherever you are going, I wouldn't stop and talk to them though, but I'll answer whatever question they have(and they do have a lot) while walking past them to where I'm trying to go. I guess it could be annoying if you were in a situation where you were in a line or something and some kid is yapping your ear off but usually they have their parents with them so its okay to talk to them if necessary.

That was very helpful. Thank you

EdyChristian28 · Apr 29, 2017

nothing is more cruel than a child.

that's why the bible refers to evil as immature.

You witness it and you find that it is. based in immaturity and greed.

Big Drew · Apr 29, 2017

I agree with the others...if you don't know, or barely know the parents it's best to keep your distance...OTOH, you don't want to be rude and hurt the child's feelings...so you can be polite, say hello on the sidewalk or in the hallway (whatever kind of building you live in.)
I would think as long as your speaking to them in a common area where others are around you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

As a parent...I live in a neighborhood, but I don't really socialize with my neighbors...nothing against them, it's just that I grew up on a farm and am used to having privacy...one of my neighbors practically lives outside...grills almost every day, sits in a lawn chair on his driveway when the weather is nice...one of my daughters likes to check the mail everyday so I've noticed her talking with the neighbor quite a few times...it doesn't concern me because he stays in his yard and she stays in ours...just friendly "neighborly" chatter...I would be concerned if he tried asking her over to his house or something like that...but it's out in the open with a lot of distance between them so it doesn't bother me.

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 29, 2017

Big Drew said:
I agree with the others...if you don't know, or barely know the parents it's best to keep your distance...OTOH, you don't want to be rude and hurt the child's feelings...so you can be polite, say hello on the sidewalk or in the hallway (whatever kind of building you live in.)
I would think as long as your speaking to them in a common area where others are around you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

As a parent...I live in a neighborhood, but I don't really socialize with my neighbors...nothing against them, it's just that I grew up on a farm and am used to having privacy...one of my neighbors practically lives outside...grills almost every day, sits in a lawn chair on his driveway when the weather is nice...one of my daughters likes to check the mail everyday so I've noticed her talking with the neighbor quite a few times...it doesn't concern me because he stays in his yard and she stays in ours...just friendly "neighborly" chatter...I would be concerned if he tried asking her over to his house or something like that...but it's out in the open with a lot of distance between them so it doesn't bother me.

Thank you very much. This helps as well.

JingshenBianxi · Apr 29, 2017

IAMABELIEVER1979 said:
That would make me nervous.

Every professional athlete experiences that nervous feeling before a game.
Every professional singer experiences that nervous feeling before a live performance.
Every public speaker experiences that nervous feeling before speaking publicly.

You understand where I'm going with this?

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 29, 2017

JingshenBianxi said:
Every professional athlete experiences that nervous feeling before a game.
Every professional singer experiences that nervous feeling before a live performance.
Every public speaker experiences that nervous feeling before speaking publicly.

You understand where I'm going with this?

Yes I do. But they still perform regardless how nervous they are.

Adstar · Apr 29, 2017

IAMABELIEVER1979 said:
I am a loner. The extent of my dealings with people are through the internet, and the very few friends that I have.

I do not talk to any of my neighbors, except for maybe a very few that I have known for years, and some that are just extremely outgoing. But other than that I mind my own business and keep to myself.

But every once in a while I come across really friendly kids that like to talk to me. This does not happen often, but it does happen.

Right now in my apartment building there two kids that always talk to me: a boy and a girl. I know the boys parents a little bit, but I am not friends with them. And the girl's parents I don't know at all. Her father would not his head at me when he sees me every once in awhile but I ignore it; I notice it but I don't respond.

This girl will politely make comments to me, and I think she even asked me if I liked her dress.

The point that I am making this is very very dangerous for me. Would I ever hurt a child? Of course not. But the parents don't know that. The last thing I need is the parents to come at me with a baseball bat.

I never smile. I am not friendly. I don't do anything to bring this on.

What would be the appropriate way to handle a very friendly child, and to tell him or her that they shouldn't be talking to you without hurting their feelings?

I have got to protect myself. I know that it says we are supposed to love our neighbors as ourselves, but I can't be friendly to a child that doesn't know me. That's not very smart. Most child offenses, like 94% of them, are done by men.

Again, will I ever hurt a child? Of course not. But I have to look at it through the parents eyes.

If your child is talking to a stranger, would you be very upset about that, even if it was your neighbor that you barely know?

Again I ask how do I handle this without offending anyone?

Look at it from a different perspective.

As long as these kids are talking to you then they are safe... Right ?

So if you shun them and don'ttalk to them maybe they will wander on and find another adult stranger to talk to.. Maybe an adult stranger they should never go anywhere near or ever talk to..

Maybe the best way to deal with it is right a letter to their parents and explain the situation, whatis happening.. Slip the letter under their door and wait to see how they respond.. If they have concerns they will tell their kids not to talk to you. But if they are ok with you then they will respond by telling you everything is cool..

Your letter can be the same type of letter you have posted here to us..

Anway i hope you become more at ease with aknowledging neighbours and talking with others.. I am a bit of a loner myself so i kind of know what it is like..

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 29, 2017

Adstar said:
Look at it from a different perspective.

As long as these kids are talking to you then they are safe... Right ?

So if you shun them and don'ttalk to them maybe they will wander on and find another adult stranger to talk to.. Maybe an adult stranger they should never go anywhere near or ever talk to..

Maybe the best way to deal with it is right a letter to their parents and explain the situation, whatis happening.. Slip the letter under their door and wait to see how they respond.. If they have concerns they will tell their kids not to talk to you. But if they are ok with you then they will respond by telling you everything is cool..

Your letter can be the same type of letter you have posted here to us..

Anway i hope you become more at ease with aknowledging neighbours and talking with others.. I am a bit of a loner myself so i kind of know what it is like..

That is an interesting way of looking at it. It's something to think about.

Andrew4jesus · Apr 29, 2017

IAMABELIEVER1979 said:
It is a shame. I love being a man, but I hate the fact that my gender is one that people have to look out for when they are around sometimes. But I do get why.

I mean a woman can talk to anyone just fine. I have to be careful because I am a man.

It's a sad fact of life that in our mixed up society people do wicked things to children.
I think I know how you feel to a certain extent. I have children myself (albeit grown up now).
As a parent our protective instincts are very strong and sometimes accusations and fearmongering can get the better of people with such strong protective feelings. My own mother took a beating from my father whilst shielding me from him. She would have died for me I'm sure, as would most parents for their children.
It is a strange situation to feel. If the child was alone and they were young I would let the parents know they have wandered off. As it appears your making regular contact ( well the child is lol) I would let the parents know their little sparrows are talking to you. They can then decide how to deal with their children talking to people they meet in their area.
The next stranger that child talks to might not be the kind soul that you are. Let the parents know the kind of man you are.

IAMABELIEVER1979 · Apr 29, 2017

Andrew4jesus said:
It's a sad fact of life that in our mixed up society people do wicked things to children.
I think I know how you feel to a certain extent. I have children myself (albeit grown up now).
As a parent our protective instincts are very strong and sometimes accusations and fearmongering can get the better of people with such strong protective feelings. My own mother took a beating from my father whilst shielding me from him. She would have died for me I'm sure, as would most parents for their children.
It is a strange situation to feel. If the child was alone and they were young I would let the parents know they have wandered off. As it appears your making regular contact ( well the child is lol) I would let the parents know their little sparrows are talking to you. They can then decide how to deal with their children talking to people they meet in their area.
The next stranger that child talks to might not be the kind soul that you are. Let the parents know the kind of man you are.

Thank you very much. I can do that.

The dangers of talking to little kids

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