mehertns, I have prayed to the point of tears for you and your mother today. I don't know why your simple plea for help has touched me so much. Maybe it is because of you or maybe it's because of your mother, I don't know, but I know you are in pain.
God doesn't always do things the way we want them, but he hears you. I will pray for you, but please pray to him yourself. Not just a "Hey, how ya doing" prayer, but a soul pouring, mind exposing conversation with the one who made us...the one who will bring us all home to him that seek him.
Pray for your mother, pray for yourself. Remember that He has enough time for your problems, however insignificant they may seem at the present, as well as your joys.
I know this is not really a thread asking for guidance, but if you are interested in learning about the bible and how accurate it is, a short book that helped me out not so long ago was More than a Carpenter, by Josh McDowell. This may not be the time for you to read it, but it only costs about $5 dollars at most book stores, and may be something that can bring you closer to God. If you don't get it now, just store this info for another time. But I think it will help.
With Love,
RCF