Is this a Christian forum or a Castro Street bar?

I take responsibility for starting this phenomenon, but...

...all of my threads were clean (even in a clinical sense) and spoke to actual, real-world scenarios that single and searching Christians can and do actually encounter. None were distasteful to any person or group of people, and if you don't care for them, you can choose not to participate. So you don't care for the transsexual lifestyle? Guess what; it exists anyway, and most of us will meet at least one within our lifetimes. In no remote way could my thread have been taken as an endorsement or a mockery.

I blame the current situation on certain individuals (cough)Macrina(cough) who chose to, rather than contribute to these discusssions, gratuitously mock them (i.e. the "would you date a gay space alien" thread).

You know, if the forums were always like this, I'm pretty sure I'd either kill myself or stop coming. As long as the ridiculous number of good and absurd polls doesn't stay this high, I don't think it's that big of a deal.

indra_fanatic said:

I take responsibility for starting this phenomenon, but...

...all of my threads were clean (even in a clinical sense) and spoke to actual, real-world scenarios that single and searching Christians can and do actually encounter. None were distasteful to any person or group of people, and if you don't care for them, you can choose not to participate. So you don't care for the transsexual lifestyle? Guess what; it exists anyway, and most of us will meet at least one within our lifetimes. In no remote way could my thread have been taken as an endorsement or a mockery.

I blame the current situation on certain individuals (cough)Macrina(cough) who chose to, rather than contribute to these discusssions, gratuitously mock them (i.e. the "would you date a gay space alien" thread).

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Okay, at least we're pointing fingers, now. That's constructive.

You know, I think hypothetical ethical questions are fairly absurd by definition. Macrina and LOVEthroughINTELLECT started their threads because of the sheer volume of such questions. They thought it was overdone, and, frankly, I agreed with them. Would you marry someone who 'x'? Would you marry someone who 'y'? Would you marry someone who 'z'?

Now, you know I don't have any problems with you, indra_fanatic. x, y, and z are all unusual, and would cause us to feel awkward ways. But couldn't it all be summed up in a single thread, "There are some extreme situations in which some of you may find yourselves (eg- x, y, and z). Would any of these give you pause?" This is a single thread about hypothetical ethical situations. If you feel attacked by the joke versions of the threads you started, don't. They aren't about you, and they never were.

JeremiahJ said:

You know, if the forums were always like this, I'm pretty sure I'd either kill myself or stop coming. As long as the ridiculous number of good and absurd polls doesn't stay this high, I don't think it's that big of a deal.

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I sure hope you wouldn't kill yourself. I don't think that's a legitimate response to what you read in an online Singles forum.

indra_fanatic said:

I take responsibility for starting this phenomenon, but...

...all of my threads were clean (even in a clinical sense) and spoke to actual, real-world scenarios that single and searching Christians can and do actually encounter. None were distasteful to any person or group of people, and if you don't care for them, you can choose not to participate. So you don't care for the transsexual lifestyle? Guess what; it exists anyway, and most of us will meet at least one within our lifetimes. In no remote way could my thread have been taken as an endorsement or a mockery.

I blame the current situation on certain individuals (cough)Macrina(cough) who chose to, rather than contribute to these discusssions, gratuitously mock them (i.e. the "would you date a gay space alien" thread).

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I agree completely.

Oh come on-- lets not spend the rest of the day pointing fingers..

We all have different opinions and ways about doing thing in fun and such.

Hope everyone has a Blessed Day!

Irascible said:

I personally was referring to no one thread in particular but rather the sheer volume of discussion centered on perversion.

OK. You were making a blanket statement.

There is a place for sincere discussion of heavy and relevant topics. Many threads have gone beyond relevant. Some have no sincerity. And certainly they don't belong in a Christian forum.

And who appointed you to make this determination?

We as Christians are judged by appearances, and rightly so. If we can't maintain higher standards than the world then we shame the name of Christ. If an unbeliever had perused the forum over the last few days, he'd be hard pressed to find so much discussion, both sincere and flippant, centered on perversion in a bar.

Well, while you are running around in your black suit, white shirt and narrow black tie, representing me properly so that the world can judge me accurately, I'll just continue on here in Chelsea, Manhattan in New York City, arguably the gayest neighborhood in the world. I'll just continue talking to transvestites, there are usually a few outside my door on their way to the drag show at the bar down the street. And I'll continue to talk to the gay prostitutes at my gym, in between their appointment calls received on the their cellphones, while they work out. I'll continue to talk to the French guy who used to be a prostitute but now produces "high qualitiy" gay inappropriate content. I believe God can save him too.

Now, maybe all this is a little too distasteful for your Christian sensibilities, but you know what? I think these are the kinds of people Jesus talked to and that's a good enough example for me to follow.

The last time I read such a response was from a guy on a job related forum who, like the unoriginal drone that he was, relayed quite a few Catholic priest / pedophilia jokes. To hear such rationalization on a Christian forum is sad. As kisstheson points out, would Jesus have so flippantly discussed horrendously perverse and destructive lifestyles?

You know, I don't know how He would talk to the people I talk to in my neighborhood. I'll let the Holy Spirit guide me in how I talk to them. Thanks for trying to clean me up though.

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Maybe you should clean off your monitor after reading something written by someone like me.

indra_fanatic said:

...all of my threads were clean (even in a clinical sense) and spoke to actual, real-world scenarios that single and searching Christians can and do actually encounter.

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I have known people who were struggling with a past full of some of the issues that you brought up and who were afraid for their future with respect to dating and marrying fellow Christians and starting families. Their struggles are real, and we all probably need to be prepared to support them and help them.

It seems to me that the problem is that--like so much of the past--the church institution is slow to adjust to political, social and cultural changes and either backs into reality or has its begrudging self dragged into reality. The church is almost never a leader in the social processes that shape the world. The church does not make things happen in the world. Things happen to the world and the church either resists and displays pride, self-righteousness, etc. or makes knee jerk reactions and looks like a bunch of fools. That is what is a negative witness for Christ, in my humble opinion. Things like "making fun of" people who are different--if that is what people are really doing--are only symptoms of the larger problem described in this paragraph.

We wouldn't have the alleged (and I stress alleged; I am not taking sides or commenting on the nature of the discussions that have been scrutizined in this thread) problems that this thread brings up if Christians would take the lead in recognizing, understanding and adjusting to reality with respect to natural and social processes rather than always playing catch up with the rest of the world.

You probably subconsciously, if not consciously, recognize the need for Christians to adjust to mainstream society, and, therefore, you created those threads. There is nothing wrong with that, and you shouldn't have to apologize for it. However, it may have been too much at one time.

Meanwhile, I encourage and challenge everybody to not only adjust, but to start taking the lead so that we don't have to adjust so much.

All kidding aside, I wish to make two points:

1) It was never my intention to ridicule or attack anyone.
2) I really will bow to the mods discretion on this, and I am perfectly serious -- if you feel that my sense of humor is inappropriate, then let's have it arbitrated rather than argue about it. I will go along with whatever is deemed by the mods to be appropriate forum conduct.

LOVEthroughINTELLECT said:

I have known people who were struggling with a past full of some of the issues that you brought up and who were afraid for their future with respect to dating and marrying fellow Christians and starting families. Their struggles are real, and we all probably need to be prepared to support them and help them.

You probably subconsciously, if not consciously, recognize the need for Christians to adjust to mainstream society, and, therefore, you created those threads. There is nothing wrong with that, and you shouldn't have to apologize for it. However, it may have been too much at one time.

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Love, my intention wasn't so much that as I wanted simply for people to think about these issues. I wanted to see where some other believers my age group and social position stand. I did not really intend for there to be right or wrong answers, simply a forum for opinions and leanings. Thank you for your support, though.

You are right, though, that all sorts of lifestyles and pasts circulate around in mainstream society that we are increasingly needing to offer some kind of response to. Whether or not we choose to date anyone in these scenarios, we are obliged to treat them with love, respect and dignity.

Brian

Argent said:

Maybe you should clean off your monitor after reading something written by someone like me.

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Well, while you are running around in your black suit, white shirt and narrow black tie, representing me properly so that the world can judge me accurately, I'll just continue on here in Chelsea, Manhattan in New York City, arguably the gayest neighborhood in the world. I'll just continue talking to transvestites, there are usually a few outside my door on their way to the drag show at the bar down the street. And I'll continue to talk to the gay prostitutes at my gym, in between their appointment calls received on the their cellphones, while they work out. I'll continue to talk to the French guy who used to be a prostitute but now produces "high qualitiy" gay inappropriate content. I believe God can save him too.

Now, maybe all this is a little too distasteful for your Christian sensibilities, but you know what? I think these are the kinds of people Jesus talked to and that's a good enough example for me to follow.


If this was the message proclaimed on "that thread" I would not have protested. I didn't see a hint of Christ's compassion for such people. No. I don't agree with the gay lifestyle, or ponographer's etc. but I don't call gays "****." or poke fun at others that are different than me.

No. No one used the word "***" but the title of the thread implied a mocking tone of the subject.

Those people who you claim you would associate with may be visiting this forum. What would they think if they saw some of the threads around here?

Nope. I don't wear a black suit and a narrow tie. I'm a hippie from the 70's. I like jeans and tee shirts myself.

I agree totally! Jesus can save and loves everyone.

Christian forums
But this one is for singles only!

I was noticing there were a few 'out-there' threads appearing all at once... maybe we should set up an area specifically for those sort of questions so that the rest of us don't have to see them... I'm just thinking that there are 12 year olds who are allowed to read these threads...

*** Mod Hat On ***

I would like to ask all participants not to make it personal. The op raises a question and asks for feedback and opinions of others.

It is not surprising that views differ ... but I would like everyone to keep the rules in mind - esp. but not only rule 1 and 2

*** Mod Hat Off ***

If I may ... I would like to say something.

But first I apologize for not being present ... I hardly check into this forum. So I was not aware of those threads

Looking at the titles of some of the threads discussed here ... the "would you marry a ..."

one man came to my mind. He was not asked, he was told to marry a prostitute

[BIBLE]Hosea 1:2-3[/BIBLE]

But that's not all I wanted to say

A lot depends of what we do with a thread like this? It can be turned in to a fun thread only or it could be turned into a well, study thread.

What if we do fall in love with a person who was a protistute (for example).

What do we do if we find ourselves attracted to someone we know that God does not want us to be with ... He might want us to witness, He might want us to wait until the person changes.

Some of the questions asked in these threads are questions that some believers have to answer, react to, live out - regardless of how they react.

What if we married someone not knowing about her / his past and one day we find out. It might be the person changed and stopped ... and did not say anything out of fear of rejection.

The real question and it is a serious one behind these question is: what if I am really facing this possibility?

Irascible said:

It's not where we've been but where we're going that counts.

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Irascible said:

Now throw in a bunch of other rather absurd but innocent threads, parody threads, copycat threads and a choking number of polls and it was my considered opinion that it wasn't quite right in here.

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Yeah, things are looking a little different in here lately.

eatenbylocusts said:

Yeah, things are looking a little different in here lately.

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This forum misses your substantive posts.