Why Are So Many Young Priests Leaving Ministry?

[Michie]

Priestly fraternity and lay support are of vital importance. How can we do better?

When Toby — not his real name — approached the altar during his ordination Mass roughly a decade ago, he was understandably nervous — perhaps much more so than the average ordinand.

Despite growing up Catholic, loving his faith, and enjoying constant encouragement throughout his seminary experience, Toby had nevertheless been harboring serious doubts about whether he could truly say “Yes” to priesthood. But he says expectations from family, supporters and the seminary itself created a situation where he felt it impossible to step back from ordination.

Though he immediately felt deeply insecure in the priesthood, Toby, on the advice of an older priest, decided to take his best swing at parish ministry.

“By Christmas, I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown,” Toby recalled.

“I was trying to do something wholeheartedly and properly and conscientiously, and my heart wasn’t there. Especially, saying Mass became very painful. It was this experience of this chasm between what I was doing and where I was [mentally].”

Toby requested laicization just a few years after his ordination day. He told the Register he had always harbored a strong attraction to marriage; he’s happily married today.

Continued below.

Why Are So Many Young Priests Leaving Ministry?

Priestly fraternity and lay support are of vital importance. How can we do better?

www.ncregister.com

 

[PloverWing]

[ Posting in fellowship, out of curiosity and care. I'm taking as given that we're talking about a celibate male priesthood. ]

The points raised in this article about loneliness seem like they shouldn't be new. Life in a community of monks or nuns has companionship and community, a kind of family. But a parish priest isn't surrounded by a community of peers in the same way. He has his congregation, but there's always going to be a certain distance there, because of the authority he holds. So it seems like the life of a parish priest is always a life of solitude -- caring for others without support for one's self -- and carrying the risk of loneliness and exhaustion.

Has it always been this way, or were there support systems in past centuries that we don't have now? Did people used to serve as priests in the villages where they grew up, so they had friends and family in the village? Or do most parishes have multiple priests, so they can support each other? In the past, how did priests find connection and friends and community, and what is different now?

 

[RileyG]

Priestly fraternity and lay support are of vital importance. How can we do better?

When Toby — not his real name — approached the altar during his ordination Mass roughly a decade ago, he was understandably nervous — perhaps much more so than the average ordinand.

Despite growing up Catholic, loving his faith, and enjoying constant encouragement throughout his seminary experience, Toby had nevertheless been harboring serious doubts about whether he could truly say “Yes” to priesthood. But he says expectations from family, supporters and the seminary itself created a situation where he felt it impossible to step back from ordination.

Though he immediately felt deeply insecure in the priesthood, Toby, on the advice of an older priest, decided to take his best swing at parish ministry.

“By Christmas, I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown,” Toby recalled.

“I was trying to do something wholeheartedly and properly and conscientiously, and my heart wasn’t there. Especially, saying Mass became very painful. It was this experience of this chasm between what I was doing and where I was [mentally].”

Toby requested laicization just a few years after his ordination day. He told the Register he had always harbored a strong attraction to marriage; he’s happily married today.

Continued below.

Why Are So Many Young Priests Leaving Ministry?

Priestly fraternity and lay support are of vital importance. How can we do better?

www.ncregister.com

May God bless us with many more young priests and holy ones!

 

[RileyG]

[ Posting in fellowship, out of curiosity and care. I'm taking as given that we're talking about a celibate male priesthood. ]

The points raised in this article about loneliness seem like they shouldn't be new. Life in a community of monks or nuns has companionship and community, a kind of family. But a parish priest isn't surrounded by a community of peers in the same way. He has his congregation, but there's always going to be a certain distance there, because of the authority he holds. So it seems like the life of a parish priest is always a life of solitude -- caring for others without support for one's self -- and carrying the risk of loneliness and exhaustion.

Has it always been this way, or were there support systems in past centuries that we don't have now? Did people used to serve as priests in the villages where they grew up, so they had friends and family in the village? Or do most parishes have multiple priests, so they can support each other? In the past, how did priests find connection and friends and community, and what is different now?

That’s a great question! I’m not sure the answer, but maybe in decades past there were more priests available so they had more companionship. I’m not really sure.

 

[Michie]

[ Posting in fellowship, out of curiosity and care. I'm taking as given that we're talking about a celibate male priesthood. ]

The points raised in this article about loneliness seem like they shouldn't be new. Life in a community of monks or nuns has companionship and community, a kind of family. But a parish priest isn't surrounded by a community of peers in the same way. He has his congregation, but there's always going to be a certain distance there, because of the authority he holds. So it seems like the life of a parish priest is always a life of solitude -- caring for others without support for one's self -- and carrying the risk of loneliness and exhaustion.

Has it always been this way, or were there support systems in past centuries that we don't have now? Did people used to serve as priests in the villages where they grew up, so they had friends and family in the village? Or do most parishes have multiple priests, so they can support each other? In the past, how did priests find connection and friends and community, and what is different now?

We have 2 priests and a deacon. There are priestly retreats throughout the year for fellowship amongst the priests. I know I formed a closer relationship with my priest through my work in the Church. I feel like seminaries don’t really prepare seminarians as they should for just the daily stress and workload heaped upon parish priests. Many in laity scarcely think of these things and do not give the support and encouragement needed. I feel like there is sort of an invisible barrier for both the priests and laity about not forming too strong of an attachment because the following summer the priests could be transferred to another parish. So people sort of walk a fine line when it comes to that. I think there are some practices in the Catholic Church that seem unhealthy and do not encourage meaningful relationships. And the priests are the ones that suffer for it. So this article does not surprise me. When I first enquired into the Church, a priest had been sent away for treatment for depression and alcoholism… the assistant priest was very depressed as well. Sort of crestfallen… I talked to him a a couple of hours on the phone to question him about my concerns before attending my first Mass which happened to fall on Ash Wednesday… he told me later on that I was the boost he needed at that point in his vocation to keep going. He became the official priest in the parish after that and we did a lot of volunteer work together along with the deacon. He is still a priest today in another area. This is just my opinion/uneducated guess but I do think the Church needs to work more in supporting more in the more human touch aspect of things as far as relationships and support. I was just helping in several areas and even I was getting burned out. I just think the Church needs to look at this aspect of things as well as the laity instead of leaving our clergy to struggle alone.

 

[Michie]

I don’t know if anyone read this link from the op:

New Survey on Priests: 8 Key Insights on Well-Being, Opinions and Pastoral Priorities

Interesting details include political affiliation, pastoral desires vs. parish life, synodality, loneliness and more.

www.ncregister.com

 

[FaithT]

[ Posting in fellowship, out of curiosity and care. I'm taking as given that we're talking about a celibate male priesthood. ]

The points raised in this article about loneliness seem like they shouldn't be new. Life in a community of monks or nuns has companionship and community, a kind of family. But a parish priest isn't surrounded by a community of peers in the same way. He has his congregation, but there's always going to be a certain distance there, because of the authority he holds. So it seems like the life of a parish priest is always a life of solitude -- caring for others without support for one's self -- and carrying the risk of loneliness and exhaustion.

Has it always been this way, or were there support systems in past centuries that we don't have now? Did people used to serve as priests in the villages where they grew up, so they had friends and family in the village? Or do most parishes have multiple priests, so they can support each other? In the past, how did priests find connection and friends and community, and what is different now?

Priestly fraternity and lay support are of vital importance. How can we do better?

When Toby — not his real name — approached the altar during his ordination Mass roughly a decade ago, he was understandably nervous — perhaps much more so than the average ordinand.

Despite growing up Catholic, loving his faith, and enjoying constant encouragement throughout his seminary experience, Toby had nevertheless been harboring serious doubts about whether he could truly say “Yes” to priesthood. But he says expectations from family, supporters and the seminary itself created a situation where he felt it impossible to step back from ordination.

Though he immediately felt deeply insecure in the priesthood, Toby, on the advice of an older priest, decided to take his best swing at parish ministry.

“By Christmas, I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown,” Toby recalled.

“I was trying to do something wholeheartedly and properly and conscientiously, and my heart wasn’t there. Especially, saying Mass became very painful. It was this experience of this chasm between what I was doing and where I was [mentally].”

Toby requested laicization just a few years after his ordination day. He told the Register he had always harbored a strong attraction to marriage; he’s happily married today.

Continued below.

Why Are So Many Young Priests Leaving Ministry?

Priestly fraternity and lay support are of vital importance. How can we do better?

www.ncregister.com

I hope my priests don’t feel this way but they aren’t just recently out of seminary. They are probably in their 60’s or 70’s. We did have a younger priest who’s probably in his mid 30’s now who‘d been transferred. He seemed to have adjusted well to priesthood but you never know what people are thinking and feeling.

 

[FaithT]

[ Posting in fellowship, out of curiosity and care. I'm taking as given that we're talking about a celibate male priesthood. ]

The points raised in this article about loneliness seem like they shouldn't be new. Life in a community of monks or nuns has companionship and community, a kind of family. But a parish priest isn't surrounded by a community of peers in the same way. He has his congregation, but there's always going to be a certain distance there, because of the authority he holds. So it seems like the life of a parish priest is always a life of solitude -- caring for others without support for one's self -- and carrying the risk of loneliness and exhaustion.

Has it always been this way, or were there support systems in past centuries that we don't have now? Did people used to serve as priests in the villages where they grew up, so they had friends and family in the village? Or do most parishes have multiple priests, so they can support each other? In the past, how did priests find connection and friends and community, and what is different now?

We currently have three priests and four deacons in my parish. And in past years, maybe now too, I don’t know, but they seemed to be friends with priests from other nearby parishes. There are three Catholic parishes in my suburb plus another one about a 20 minute drive away.

 

[FaithT]

May God bless us with many more young priests and holy ones!

Amen!

 

[RileyG]

We currently have three priests and four deacons in my parish. And in past years, maybe now too, I don’t know, but they seemed to be friends with priests from other nearby parishes. There are three Catholic parishes in my suburb plus another one about a 20 minute drive away.

My diocese has many young priests and many young seminarians. I think there is only one or two permanent deacons.

We have been immensely blessed!

 

[RileyG]

I hope my priests don’t feel this way but they aren’t just recently out of seminary. They are probably in their 60’s or 70’s. We did have a younger priest who’s probably in his mid 30’s now who‘d been transferred. He seemed to have adjusted well to priesthood but you never know what people are thinking and feeling.

We must pray for many more young men to join the priesthood! Also related, many young men and women to join the religious life!

Lord, hear our prayer!

I’m 30, and one of the priest at my parish is younger than me. He was ordained this past year. I think he’s maybe 27 or 28?