Lust - You've been misled and it bothers me

[Yanky]

I watch Christians (mostly male) torture themselves over lust. I think it is fair to say that most Christians have been misled about what kind of lust that Jesus was talking about. Here it is in a nutshell.

The word almost always translated as “lust” in Matthew 5:28 is the Greek ἐπιθυμέω (epithumeō). In every other place in the New Testament it’s translated as “covet” or “desire” (sometimes even positively), and in the Septuagint (the Greek Old Testament that Jesus and the apostles quoted) it’s the exact word used for “You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife” (Exodus 20:17). So the context is clearly coveting → mentally violating the Seventh Commandment by fantasizing about adultery with a married woman.

Jesus was intensifying the Torah’s command against adultery, not issuing a blanket condemnation of sexual desire or attraction. The early Church Fathers (Augustine especially) later universalized it into “any sexual thought outside of procreative marital sex = mortal sin,” and that sex-negative overlay got baked into Western Christianity (and then influenced some Jewish and Muslim interpretations too). But Jesus didn't say that at all.

So yes: noticing an attractive single woman and feeling turned on? Perfectly normal, healthy, and morally neutral.

Mentally undressing your friend’s wife and cultivating the fantasy? That’s the “adultery in the heart” Jesus was talking about.

Other later church figures widened the topic to saying that all lust is bad. But that's not at all what Jesus said. I feel bad hearing Christian males feeling guilty for no good reason.

Can anyone relate to this?

 

[Maria Billingsley]

I watch Christians (mostly male) torture themselves over lust. I think it is fair to say that most Christians have been misled about what kind of lust that Jesus was talking about. Here it is in a nutshell.

The word almost always translated as “lust” in Matthew 5:28 is the Greek ἐπιθυμέω (epithumeō). In every other place in the New Testament it’s translated as “covet” or “desire” (sometimes even positively), and in the Septuagint (the Greek Old Testament that Jesus and the apostles quoted) it’s the exact word used for “You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife” (Exodus 20:17). So the context is clearly coveting → mentally violating the Seventh Commandment by fantasizing about adultery with a married woman.

Jesus was intensifying the Torah’s command against adultery, not issuing a blanket condemnation of sexual desire or attraction. The early Church Fathers (Augustine especially) later universalized it into “any sexual thought outside of procreative marital sex = mortal sin,” and that sex-negative overlay got baked into Western Christianity (and then influenced some Jewish and Muslim interpretations too). But Jesus didn't say that at all.

So yes: noticing an attractive single woman and feeling turned on? Perfectly normal, healthy, and morally neutral.

Mentally undressing your friend’s wife and cultivating the fantasy? That’s the “adultery in the heart” Jesus was talking about.

Other later church figures widened the topic to saying that all lust is bad. But that's not at all what Jesus said. I feel bad hearing Christian males feeling guilty for no good reason.

Can anyone relate to this?

Men shouldn't condemn themselves, women are equally as lustful towards men.
Thanks for sharing.

 

[Reluctant Theologian]

I watch Christians (mostly male) torture themselves over lust. I think it is fair to say that most Christians have been misled about what kind of lust that Jesus was talking about. Here it is in a nutshell.

The word almost always translated as “lust” in Matthew 5:28 is the Greek ἐπιθυμέω (epithumeō). In every other place in the New Testament it’s translated as “covet” or “desire” (sometimes even positively), and in the Septuagint (the Greek Old Testament that Jesus and the apostles quoted) it’s the exact word used for “You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife” (Exodus 20:17). So the context is clearly coveting → mentally violating the Seventh Commandment by fantasizing about adultery with a married woman.

Jesus was intensifying the Torah’s command against adultery, not issuing a blanket condemnation of sexual desire or attraction. The early Church Fathers (Augustine especially) later universalized it into “any sexual thought outside of procreative marital sex = mortal sin,” and that sex-negative overlay got baked into Western Christianity (and then influenced some Jewish and Muslim interpretations too). But Jesus didn't say that at all.

So yes: noticing an attractive single woman and feeling turned on? Perfectly normal, healthy, and morally neutral.

Mentally undressing your friend’s wife and cultivating the fantasy? That’s the “adultery in the heart” Jesus was talking about.

Other later church figures widened the topic to saying that all lust is bad. But that's not at all what Jesus said. I feel bad hearing Christian males feeling guilty for no good reason.

Can anyone relate to this?

Your statement is correct and has been presented similarly earlier on this forum as well by others - but not everyone agrees to it. Interpreting Yeshua's statement in Matthew 5:28 should be done in the context of what the definition of adultery was in those days according to Torah and given Yeshua is warning a thought/mind-set is preceding actual physical sin. Indeed an expansion on Exodus 20:17.

Coveting someone else's possessions may lead to actual theft, adultery, murder, etc. I agree to your analysis - it's perfectly logical given the overall message of the Sermon on the mount.

Noticing the beauty of a unmarried woman by a man is not inherently sinful - it's simply nature and what may lead to a marriage proposal. But please guard or avert your eyes in the case of a married woman - as otherwise you're setting yourself up for physical sin later on.