Us Husbands need to know. so please be open about it. my wife and I disagree as to the extent Christian woman like want foreplay. In marriage, her Love language is fulfilled. this is contention in many marriages. how prudish are Chistian women. please respond to better clarify answers (if you can, this is my first post, not sure home this works)
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Ladies, how handsy do you like your husband?
- Thread starter thisguy777
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Whatever you and your wife are comfortable with, is what you should do. Doesn't really matter what others think.
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Foreplay is one thing , handsy( groping) is another. I suspect you may not know the difference which is why there is conflict.
Here is a basic rundown on the difference.
Foreplay is a mutually consensual act of sexual stimulation, while groping is nonconsensual touching, often with sexual intent. "Handsy" describes a person who frequently touches others in an unwanted or inappropriate way.
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you are correct. but, the question is about the extent of foreplay. how many women like what?
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PloverWing
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I'm hearing you say that you and your wife disagree about what your wife wants. I'm pretty sure that she's the expert in what she wants, so listen to her.
I'm uncomfortable with collecting statistics to use as a weapon in the bedroom. If it turns out that 99% of women like X (for some X), but your wife doesn't like X, then that's what's true -- she doesn't like X, regardless of what all those other women are doing. She shouldn't feel like she has to pretend to like X just to conform to what other women like.
I could tell you what I like in the bedroom (except that it's none of anyone's business), but that's irrelevant to what your wife likes.
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I am not questioning what she wants or doesn't want. the question is to what extent does the Christian female population like. I think its higher than what she thinks. because they don't want to look "sinful"
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PloverWing
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Okay, well, wild guess time.
I expect that many Christian women enjoy sex, including foreplay.
I expect that many women who were raised in a conservative Christian home or church have been messed up by the wildly mixed messages we heard growing up, and have a lot to unlearn before we can relax and enjoy.
Don't slap her on the bum unless you've confirmed beforehand that she's into BDSM.
I'm still uncomfortable with the wording of the multiple-choice answers. For the last option, instead of "my body is fair game for him", how about something like "we enjoy each other's bodies when we're together". Something that indicates that she's an active participant too, that sex isn't just something that's done to her.
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ChubbyCherub
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I worded it that way because I am a bit snarky and on the kinky side of bedroom time. that, and I'm not a prude.
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PloverWing
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Hmm. It's not really about being a "prude", and more about doing things that will bring you both joy. "Prude" is a word that can be used to coerce a partner into doing things they don't want to do. Kink is fine if you're both into it, genuinely into it. Kink without genuine consent is just hitting someone.
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How about uptight? there is far more kinky things than just "hitting", I don't like the pain kink (she likes to be spanked)
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Maybe this isn't the site for you. There's a website called the marriagebed where this kind of talk is more permissable.
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PloverWing
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