Is this a lack of faith? Or what?

[Gustaf]

I've been feeling pretty spiritually cold for a while now. I don't feel like praying, and while I believe in the existence of God, I've been having a hard time believing Him as a complete reality in my heart lately. I mean, I'm in church or with a group of fellow believers reading the Word, and thoughts like "this text could be a human invention" start popping into my mind, that sort of thing—distrusting that it's the Word of God or questioning some aspects. I can't quite put my finger on why this started happening. Some fellow believers tell me that it was probably my mood that changed, and that was causing me to lose my faith, and it's something that feeds off itself. But from my own perspective, I don't see it in that order; I couldn't say for sure.
While talking to a brother about this topic, he gave me a book on apologetics, and while I was reading it, it did me a lot of good. But I never achieved a consistent faith. For example, for two or three days in a row, it was like impulses or "pushes" that lasted a few hours, and if I wanted to try to recover them, I knew I had to go back to studying the apologetics book. What I also recognize is that I have a hard time humbling myself. There's a kind of hidden "anger" toward God (I don't know if it's anger or simply my pride in wanting to take things into my own hands).
But what I mean is, I can't manage to genuinely humble myself enough to make room for Jesus to take control of my life.
I know that when I can believe in God as an absolute reality (as I once did), this state of mind will vanish, and I'll live without fear and with joy again...
But I don't know how to do it. Or I don't know how to get off the pedestal where perhaps I am (I can't be sure at all) and it's preventing me from feeding on redeeming Grace...
I read you and may God bless each and every one of you.

 

[2PhiloVoid]

I've been feeling pretty spiritually cold for a while now. I don't feel like praying, and while I believe in the existence of God, I've been having a hard time believing Him as a complete reality in my heart lately. I mean, I'm in church or with a group of fellow believers reading the Word, and thoughts like "this text could be a human invention" start popping into my mind, that sort of thing—distrusting that it's the Word of God or questioning some aspects. I can't quite put my finger on why this started happening. Some fellow believers tell me that it was probably my mood that changed, and that was causing me to lose my faith, and it's something that feeds off itself. But from my own perspective, I don't see it in that order; I couldn't say for sure.
While talking to a brother about this topic, he gave me a book on apologetics, and while I was reading it, it did me a lot of good. But I never achieved a consistent faith. For example, for two or three days in a row, it was like impulses or "pushes" that lasted a few hours, and if I wanted to try to recover them, I knew I had to go back to studying the apologetics book. What I also recognize is that I have a hard time humbling myself. There's a kind of hidden "anger" toward God (I don't know if it's anger or simply my pride in wanting to take things into my own hands).
But what I mean is, I can't manage to genuinely humble myself enough to make room for Jesus to take control of my life.
I know that when I can believe in God as an absolute reality (as I once did), this state of mind will vanish, and I'll live without fear and with joy again...
But I don't know how to do it. Or I don't know how to get off the pedestal where perhaps I am (I can't be sure at all) and it's preventing me from feeding on redeeming Grace...
I read you and may God bless each and every one of you.

At this point, I'd only classify your current feelings as relational angst and a moderate amount of questioning. That's normal. We all go through that in one way or another. Faith isn't achieving some level of absolute belief from whence we never fail, so maybe cut yourself a little slack and just realize you're human. And continue to get with your church group and study, pray and fellowship.

 

[Gustaf]

At this point, I'd only classify your current feelings as relational angst and a moderate amount of questioning. That's normal. We all go through that in one way or another. Faith isn't achieving some level of absolute belief from whence we never fail, so maybe cut yourself a little slack and just realize you're human. And continue to get with your church group and study, pray and fellowship.

I know, I understand your thinking, and I'm not against it, but I experience it as if it were something tragic. In this sense: when I converted, God pulled me out of a very deep and dark hole, and I'm very afraid of falling asleep and getting used to being asleep. I'm afraid of adopting a "common" way of life without joy, without faith, without believing and enjoying God's promises, and that worries me.
I would like to be a child of God, to live without fear or ties, to enjoy Him, but in this situation of doubt, I don't know what the best spiritual remedy is.
I know I have to return to prayer...

 

[2PhiloVoid]

I know, I understand your thinking, and I'm not against it, but I experience it as if it were something tragic. In this sense: when I converted, God pulled me out of a very deep and dark hole, and I'm very afraid of falling asleep and getting used to being asleep. I'm afraid of adopting a "common" way of life without joy, without faith, without believing and enjoying God's promises, and that worries me.
I would like to be a child of God, to live without fear or ties, to enjoy Him, but in this situation of doubt, I don't know what the best spiritual remedy is.
I know I have to return to prayer...

Experiencing what you're defining as a continuous and, as you've said, "consistent faith" isn't really common, and you're probably setting yourself up psychologically for disappointment by expecting it to be as such.

What you're feeling can also be signs of stress and/or depression, something many of us (probably a majority of people) experience to varying degrees. It's also common among single people. If this continues, you might want to find a good Christian psychologist to help you learn to cope.

 

[timothyu]

I mean, I'm in church or with a group of fellow believers reading the Word, and thoughts like "this text could be a human invention" start popping into my mind, that sort of thing—distrusting that it's the Word of God or questioning some aspects. I can't quite put my finger on why this started happening.

Sound like you are growing and are starting to take off the training wheels. Yes indeed some of the text is human invention. Scholars have shown where additions have been made to fit with the church narrative as time progressed. But that does not affect the teachings of Jesus, only the backstory so no problem if you seek Him and not the religion. What you may be on the verge of is realizing there is more to seeking God that the controlled narrative of an ancient church which was referred to as the blind leading the blind. The very fact you are seeking rather than being a nice little follower of the church does not mean you are slipping. Quite the opposite in fact.

I can't manage to genuinely humble myself enough to make room for Jesus to take control of my life.

Nowhere did He suggest that. That again is the religious authourity seeking to retain control. Jesus admonished the priests in His time for doing so and nothing has changed. Jesus came to give us His only Gospel, the Gospel of the Kingdom while the religion insists we follow others. He came to re-establish our relationship with the Father as a child, not a slave. In fact it is the institution that demands your service, forgetting the church is supposed to come to you and everyone, not the other way around.

God pulled me out of a very deep and dark hole, and I'm very afraid of falling asleep and getting used to being asleep.

Look at the world around you. It is asleep. Turn on the news. They are asleep and deeply absorbed in 'self'. Jesus told us the Father only wants us to be absorbed in servitude to the needs of all and in servitude to Him for doing so. No oppression here. No more self serving ways, the original sin. Its as simple as holding a door open for someone rather than just barrelling through on your own mission.

 

[Gustaf]

Sound like you are growing and are starting to take off the training wheels. Yes indeed some of the text is human invention. Scholars have shown where additions have been made to fit with the church narrative as time progressed. But that does not affect the teachings of Jesus, only the backstory so no problem if you seek Him and not the religion. What you may be on the verge of is realizing there is more to seeking God that the controlled narrative of an ancient church which was referred to as the blind leading the blind. The very fact you are seeking rather than being a nice little follower of the church does not mean you are slipping. Quite the opposite in fact.


Nowhere did He suggest that. That again is the religious authourity seeking to retain control. Jesus admonished the priests in His time for doing so and nothing has changed. Jesus came to give us His only Gospel, the Gospel of the Kingdom while the religion insists we follow others. He came to re-establish our relationship with the Father as a child, not a slave. In fact it is the institution that demands your service, forgetting the church is supposed to come to you and everyone, not the other way around.


Look at the world around you. It is asleep. Turn on the news. They are asleep and deeply absorbed in 'self'. Jesus told us the Father only wants us to be absorbed in servitude to the needs of all and in servitude to Him for doing so. No oppression here. No more self serving ways, the original sin. Its as simple as holding a door open for someone rather than just barrelling through on your own mission.

Your response is odd. I didn't mention religion, religious authorities, or institutions or services. What does any of that have to do with anything?

 

[timothyu]

What does any of that have to do with anything?

Your human mentors play a part in your life for good or bad. .

 

[com7fy8]

Trust God about this.

"casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." (1 Peter 5:7)

I've been having a hard time believing Him as a complete reality in my heart lately. I mean, I'm in church or with a group of fellow believers reading the Word, and thoughts like "this text could be a human invention" start popping into my mind, that sort of thing—distrusting that it's the Word of God

What can be human is how humans understand something in God's word.

"Test all things; hold fast what is good." (1 Thessalonians 5:21)

So, yes we should test things; but be efficient, not only making up issues and doubting.

While talking to a brother about this topic, he gave me a book on apologetics, and while I was reading it, it did me a lot of good. But I never achieved a consistent faith.

Our Apostle Paul says we need "faith working through love", in Galatians 5:6. Faith, then, has to do with not only believing ideas about God but trusting how Jesus wants us to love and generously forgive. And yes God is the One who brings us into all He means by this >

"Now may the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God and into the patience of Christ." (2 Thessalonians 3:5)

"Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us." (Romans 5:5)

What I also recognize is that I have a hard time humbling myself.

So, you know we need to be humble. Good.

Trust God to change us to how He wants us to be humble. This, I would say, includes how Jesus wants us to love > Jesus is so great and good and so humble . . . not conceited, not looking down on people . . . but humble to love any and all people. So, being humble includes how we are loving any and all people.

There's a kind of hidden "anger" toward God (I don't know if it's anger or simply my pride in wanting to take things into my own hands).

So, it is good you know that anger can be bad and we need to not have pride.

But what I mean is, I can't manage to genuinely humble myself enough to make room for Jesus to take control of my life.

It is good to submit to how Jesus guides us and shares with us.

"'Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.'" (Matthew 11:29)

There is learning involved, growing . . .

I know that when I can believe in God as an absolute reality (as I once did), this state of mind will vanish, and I'll live without fear and with joy again...
But I don't know how to do it.

"for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure." (Philippians 2:13)

Or I don't know how to get off the pedestal where perhaps I am (I can't be sure at all) and it's preventing me from feeding on redeeming Grace...

Every one of us needs to depend on God. He is not just in control, but He is creative for how to take care of us and how to love any person. So, it is good not to isolate yourself in your own effort. But God has us sharing with Him and sharing with and caring for one another. We minister as family; so God will not have people succeeding all by themselves; we do need to learn how to share with one another and minister to each other.

 

[Rose_bud]

I've been feeling pretty spiritually cold for a while now. I don't feel like praying, and while I believe in the existence of God, I've been having a hard time believing Him as a complete reality in my heart lately. I mean, I'm in church or with a group of fellow believers reading the Word, and thoughts like "this text could be a human invention" start popping into my mind, that sort of thing—distrusting that it's the Word of God or questioning some aspects. I can't quite put my finger on why this started happening. Some fellow believers tell me that it was probably my mood that changed, and that was causing me to lose my faith, and it's something that feeds off itself. But from my own perspective, I don't see it in that order; I couldn't say for sure.
While talking to a brother about this topic, he gave me a book on apologetics, and while I was reading it, it did me a lot of good. But I never achieved a consistent faith. For example, for two or three days in a row, it was like impulses or "pushes" that lasted a few hours, and if I wanted to try to recover them, I knew I had to go back to studying the apologetics book. What I also recognize is that I have a hard time humbling myself. There's a kind of hidden "anger" toward God (I don't know if it's anger or simply my pride in wanting to take things into my own hands).
But what I mean is, I can't manage to genuinely humble myself enough to make room for Jesus to take control of my life.
I know that when I can believe in God as an absolute reality (as I once did), this state of mind will vanish, and I'll live without fear and with joy again...
But I don't know how to do it. Or I don't know how to get off the pedestal where perhaps I am (I can't be sure at all) and it's preventing me from feeding on redeeming Grace...
I read you and may God bless each and every one of you.

Father I pray for Elegant and the dilemma your child is experiencing about who You are. I pray that You would once more reveal Yourself as only You can. I ask that you bring about a peace in heart and peace in mind and all questions find its end in You.

I also ask that any unresolved anger that is directed toward You be put in perspective. I know perspective also comes when we recognize You, for who You truly are. Only You can truly reveal You Lord. What does the clay know about the Potter? But You too took on the form of clay. Help Elegant Jesus.

Father I ask that you would help your child to rest in the knowledge that you have drawn near... And that you are stronger and mightier than any unction contrary to Your greatness to keep and hold Your child in the palm of Your hand. I ask that you would help Elegant with the fear that they have about returning to the deep darkness of the past. Help your child to see this as the boundary line, a line that you reached over to snatch your child from and that it is closed and shut. Elegant is walking in newness.

I ask for a new fervor and desire for the things of You. Grant Your child a desire to seek after You, with the confidence that You are never far. You are present always and that You will never leave or forsake.

 

[Yarddog]

I've been feeling pretty spiritually cold for a while now. I don't feel like praying, and while I believe in the existence of God, I've been having a hard time believing Him as a complete reality in my heart lately. I mean, I'm in church or with a group of fellow believers reading the Word, and thoughts like "this text could be a human invention" start popping into my mind, that sort of thing—distrusting that it's the Word of God or questioning some aspects. I can't quite put my finger on why this started happening. Some fellow believers tell me that it was probably my mood that changed, and that was causing me to lose my faith, and it's something that feeds off itself. But from my own perspective, I don't see it in that order; I couldn't say for sure.
While talking to a brother about this topic, he gave me a book on apologetics, and while I was reading it, it did me a lot of good. But I never achieved a consistent faith. For example, for two or three days in a row, it was like impulses or "pushes" that lasted a few hours, and if I wanted to try to recover them, I knew I had to go back to studying the apologetics book. What I also recognize is that I have a hard time humbling myself. There's a kind of hidden "anger" toward God (I don't know if it's anger or simply my pride in wanting to take things into my own hands).
But what I mean is, I can't manage to genuinely humble myself enough to make room for Jesus to take control of my life.
I know that when I can believe in God as an absolute reality (as I once did), this state of mind will vanish, and I'll live without fear and with joy again...
But I don't know how to do it. Or I don't know how to get off the pedestal where perhaps I am (I can't be sure at all) and it's preventing me from feeding on redeeming Grace...
I read you and may God bless each and every one of you.

Thank you for sharing your story. I think that most people go through the same thing during their lives.

You cannot force God to act. God does as he will it.

Do you talk to God about this. If not, I'd suggest that you do. It's just thinking because God hears you.

 

[Gustaf]

Brothers, good evening, everyone. I'm still very spiritually dry. It's affecting my relationships with others. I don't know what I should do, how to believe again, how to start over... I don't know how to do it. I've strayed far from God... I feel like an orphan.
What specific things should I put into practice to begin to ignite what has been extinguished?
Thank you.

 

[Lukaris]

I try to live my life in a basic way by the Lord’s commandments. I am thankful that I am able bodied, can work, pray, blessed with basic health & can give a few dollars to charity. I do warehouse work so I am no CEO but I am also single and do not have family to take care of so I respect those who have family to raise.

Basically, I put a few dollars aside for charity and pray as the Lord tells us in Matthew 6:1-13. If take His prayer seriously, I know I have ongoing sin and be thankful I have Him to forgive me. Even though I am hardly an evangelist, I can still pray for evangelism as the Lord says in Matthew 9:36-38. People often talk back and forth about salvation and I will pray for the salvation of my neighbor as well as my own and keep it at that ( I think of scripture like 1 Timothy 2:1-6, Colossians 1:10-23 or all of Colossians 1:1-29 for that matter).

The Lord says if we love Him, we will keep His commandments ( John 14:15-18, Matthew 19:16-19, Matthew 22:36-40, Matthew 7:12 per Matthew 7:1-12 etc.). It may not seem like I am saying much but I think if we see that we are all in this together as Christians that we are rank in file in taking on bad things that bedevil this world around us ( Ephesians 6:10-19). We should not get too carried away by this also ( 1 Peter 5:8 etc).

 

[Jerry N.]

I've been feeling pretty spiritually cold for a while now. I don't feel like praying, and while I believe in the existence of God, I've been having a hard time believing Him as a complete reality in my heart lately. I mean, I'm in church or with a group of fellow believers reading the Word, and thoughts like "this text could be a human invention" start popping into my mind, that sort of thing—distrusting that it's the Word of God or questioning some aspects. I can't quite put my finger on why this started happening. Some fellow believers tell me that it was probably my mood that changed, and that was causing me to lose my faith, and it's something that feeds off itself. But from my own perspective, I don't see it in that order; I couldn't say for sure.
While talking to a brother about this topic, he gave me a book on apologetics, and while I was reading it, it did me a lot of good. But I never achieved a consistent faith. For example, for two or three days in a row, it was like impulses or "pushes" that lasted a few hours, and if I wanted to try to recover them, I knew I had to go back to studying the apologetics book. What I also recognize is that I have a hard time humbling myself. There's a kind of hidden "anger" toward God (I don't know if it's anger or simply my pride in wanting to take things into my own hands).
But what I mean is, I can't manage to genuinely humble myself enough to make room for Jesus to take control of my life.
I know that when I can believe in God as an absolute reality (as I once did), this state of mind will vanish, and I'll live without fear and with joy again...
But I don't know how to do it. Or I don't know how to get off the pedestal where perhaps I am (I can't be sure at all) and it's preventing me from feeding on redeeming Grace...
I read you and may God bless each and every one of you.

I have some idea of how you are feeling. From the comments, I can see you have been given much good advice. You are not the only Christian who has ever felt that way.

As an analogy, my wife and I have been married for many years. The hot flames of early marriage died down many years ago. However, they have been replaced by something quieter but much stronger. It becomes most evident when one of us gets injured or sick. For me, it is the same with my feelings for God. I don’t get as excited as I used to, and I don’t feel the intense devotion I once did. However, I feel that my faith is stronger than before. It is more like walking with God as a quiet friend. Pray and remember God in all things. If you see a pretty flower or something wonderful, praise Him. Keep Him close, and He will stay close to you. I hope nothing bad happens to you, but you will be surprised how you rush back to Him when things get bad if you love and fear Him.

 

[timothyu]

What specific things should I put into practice to begin to ignite what has been extinguished?
Thank you.

Simply be polite, helpful and unselfish . It is the will of God and all He asks of us when we love all as self. He takes care of the rest, His will be done