The ‘root causes’ of sexual abuse in the Church

[Michie]

The eldest son committed suicide. He had "manic-depression" (I think they call it borderline personality disorder these days). One of his brother told me that when he was down "He was really down!" I think that was most of the time.

There were two brothers I didn't get to know very well. He was one of them and the other moved away to a country town where he still lives as far as I know. He married a local lady, they have their own family etc.

I had a fair bit to do with the remaining four brothers.

His wife died some years ago, although she outlived her husband by over 20 years.

If the pastor had still been alive he'd have turned 100 this year so I think the chances are that he would have been gone by now anyway.

We both left his church at around the same time. I got married in September 1991 and moved to the southside (in Brisbane you're either a north sider or south sider!). He died of cancer in January 1992, about four months later. But he was too sick to do much in the last few months.

I was a bit undiplomatic in one of our exchanges. We were in his office and he said to me "You sometimes seem to get a sense of things. Do you think I'll get over this?" (Cancer).

I hesitated for a minute or two, and then replied "Well, er, uh ... I've ... uh ... had a sense for a while we'll both leave this church at around the same time".

He gave me this sardonic look and said "Boy! You sure know how to cheer somebody up!"

Ha! Well he sounds like a wonderful guy. Sad to hear the son that committed suicide though. My sister was almost successful in that last December. Mental issues are a very tough illness to deal with. I guess I was curious about his wife because she was married to a man that seemed so gifted by God. Almost like a prophetic type. I wondered if she was the same or had gifts that complimented his. I think your old pastor and friend sounded very unique. I’m sort of surprised he did not pay you a visit before departing. My mother had a visit like that from her grandmother before she even knew that she passed. She got a call the following morning.

Do you think you and this pastor connected because you are more sensitive than most when it comes to the spiritual world?

 

[Bob Crowley]

I didn't talk to his wife anywhere near as much as I spoke with him, but she had spiritual sensitivity. She was certainly a peaceful person.

But I don't think she had his particular gifts. We're all different.

He didn't pay me a visible visit but the night the died I had this real sense of peace descend on me for about half an hour. I'd had it with other people from time to time (when they've just died) but this was easily the most pronounced and long lasting. I think he did visit in that sense.

I don't know exactly why we connected but I know God wanted me to meet him. Early on when I was still a new Christian, "Someone" appeared in a vision and said "I want you to stick close to Mr. Missenden (that was his name). He'll discourage you but you'll learn a lot from him." Then the someone just disappeared.

Although he did discourage me (something he did unintentionally to a number of people) I did indeed learn a lot from him. I haven't had anywhere near the same sort of personal interaction with any Catholic priest. He was easily the most influential religious person in my life.

 

[Michie]

I didn't talk to his wife anywhere near as much as I spoke with him, but she had spiritual sensitivity. She was certainly a peaceful person.

But I don't think she had his particular gifts. We're all different.

He didn't pay me a visible visit but the night the died I had this real sense of peace descend on me for about half an hour. I'd had it with other people from time to time (when they've just died) but this was easily the most pronounced and long lasting. I think he did visit in that sense.

I don't know exactly why we connected but I know God wanted me to meet him. Early on when I was still a new Christian, "Someone" appeared in a vision and said "I want you to stick close to Mr. Missenden (that was his name). He'll discourage you but you'll learn a lot from him." Then the someone just disappeared.

Although he did discourage me (something he did unintentionally to a number of people) I did indeed learn a lot from him. I haven't had anywhere near the same sort of personal interaction with any Catholic priest. He was easily the most influential religious person in my life.

You both sound like you were birds of the same feather.