Manly tears?

[Xeno.of.athens]

Is it a sign of emotional weakness or instability when a man cries? Is that what the scriptures teach?

 

[Maria Billingsley]

Is it a sign of emotional weakness or instability when a man cries? Is that what the scriptures teach?

I don't believe scripture teaches anything of the sort. Crying is the body's defense against emotional distress. The pain of a situation is temporarily suspended while the body releases stress. It is the opposite of weakness. It helps build back ones strength and character to endure. We can see in children how quickly they recover after a good cry. No shame in that. It is a God given gift. Blessings.

 

[Servus]

"Jesus wept." John 11:35

Shortest verse in the Bible.

 

[Xeno.of.athens]

I don't believe scripture teaches anything of the sort. Crying is the body's defense against emotional distress. The pain of a situation is temporarily suspended while the body releases stress. It is the opposite of weakness. It helps build back ones strength and character to endure. We can see in children how quickly they recover after a good cry. No shame in that. It is a God given gift. Blessings.

Why then, do you think, that boys are trained not to cry from about age 10 or a little more?

 

[Maria Billingsley]

Why then, do you think, that boys are trained not to cry from about age 10 or a little more?

Society has not evolved enough to understands Gods creation.
Blessings

 

[Servus]

Why then, do you think, that boys are trained not to cry from about age 10 or a little more?

Probably because throughout history young men have been soldiers. So it's been an age old tradition to teach boys to be resilient, because in a few years they'd probably be sent off to fight in some battle.

 

[Strong in Him]

Is it a sign of emotional weakness or instability when a man cries? Is that what the scriptures teach?

No, of course not.
Jesus wept.

 

[ViaCrucis]

Is it a sign of emotional weakness or instability when a man cries? Is that what the scriptures teach?

No, and no.

Further, we are weak. We being human beings. That is central to the Christian confession about our own frail and sinful humanity and our need for the Savior.

-CryptoLutheran

 

[trophy33]

Is it a sign of emotional weakness or instability when a man cries?

If you cry for yourself, yes.

Also, do not cry before your woman (most women will lose attraction to you) or before children (it will have a serious impact on their mental stability, they need to see you as a stable protective force).

 

[ViaCrucis]

If you cry for yourself, yes.

Also, do not cry before your woman (most women will lose attraction to you) or before children (it will have a serious impact on their mental stability, they need to see you as a stable protective force).

My dad never had any problem shedding tears. At no point did I ever see him as weak for crying, instead I saw him as someone who actually cared and loved.

So I hope you're joking and not being serious in your comments.

-CryptoLutheran

 

[trophy33]

My dad never had any problem shedding tears. At no point did I ever see him as weak for crying, instead I saw him as someone who actually cared and loved.

So I hope you're joking and not being serious in your comments.

-CryptoLutheran

I am serious.

It depends on the age of children, of course. And on the reason of crying.

If you do not want your children to develop various forms of anxiety, be emotionally stable, at least before them while they are small/sensitive.

 

[Neogaia777]

If you are a leader of anyone, or anything, then you might need the ability to control those tears at times, otherwise you could dishearten, or make weak, those whom you are leading, and might make them weak in situations that call for strength, etc, but there are probably also times also, that, even under those circumstances, it might be appropriate to show them that it's ok to show emotion, or is sometimes ok to cry. But careful discernment, and the ability to control it, is probably of great importance in this area, and very well may be where true strength lies, etc.

God Bless!

 

[Neogaia777]

You don't want to cry in front of, or in presence of those who could be your enemies, or it is a lot like throwing your pearls before swine.

So the ability to control it, or have a choice before choosing it, could be maybe very important maybe, for it is not always "safe" to cry. And also people could also greatly misunderstand the real reason for your shedding any tears also, and you don't want to decieve them also.

So, anyway, at times you might need the ability to be as hard as iron, and then maybe at other times also, as soft and as malleable as clay, and you will probably always need the ability to be or choose between either, for whatever the situation may require, or might be.

God Bless!

 

[Strong in Him]

Also, do not cry before your woman (most women will lose attraction to you) or before children (it will have a serious impact on their mental stability, they need to see you as a stable protective force).

Sorry, but no.

Not crying in front of children might impact their mental stability - they may grow up believing that crying is weak or shameful.
Keeping their emotions, and sadness, bottled up in side may lead to physical illness - ulcers, heart attacks, or behavioural issues - violent outbursts, turning to drink to cope with their inner pain. The incidences of suicide are far greater in men than in women - it is the most common form of male death.
And I wouldn't feel at all badly towards a man who shed a few tears - it makes them human, shows that they care and is actually quite brave. I know a Minister who used to start funeral services by saying, "a word to the men; 'big boys don't cry' is rubbish. You cry if you need to; no one is judging."

 

[Neogaia777]

.

Sorry, but no.

Not crying in front of children might impact their mental stability - they may grow up believing that crying is weak or shameful.
Keeping their emotions, and sadness, bottled up in side may lead to physical illness - ulcers, heart attacks, or behavioural issues - violent outbursts, turning to drink to cope with their inner pain. The incidences of suicide are far greater in men than in women - it is the most common form of male death.
And I wouldn't feel at all badly towards a man who shed a few tears - it makes them human, shows that they care and is actually quite brave. I know a Minister who used to start funeral services by saying, "a word to the men; 'big boys don't cry' is rubbish. You cry if you need to; no one is judging."

Nevertheless, depending on the situation, crying or shedding tears all of the time, is not always "wise".

And if you are shedding them like "all of the time", then my guess is that you are either trying to manipulate someone, or some group of people, or it is a very great sign of some much more serious deeply unresolved issues still, still way down deep on the inside.

God Bless.

 

[trophy33]

they may grow up believing that crying is weak or shameful.

Crying is a sign of internal weakness. We do not cry when we feel strong or victorious. Is it not obvious?

It may be shameful when you cry in situations you must not cry, for example when your family needs a strong and stable man - which is some men's role. Its shameful not to fulfill our elementary roles.

Keeping their emotions, and sadness, bottled up in side may lead to physical illness - ulcers, heart attacks, or behavioural issues - violent outbursts, turning to drink to cope with their inner pain.

This sounds like some modern American view. Anyway, what I am talking about here is public crying (in front of others) and crying because of ourselves or because of our fears.

 

[Neogaia777]

I consider my own tears "pearls", so if you ever do get to see them, then you should consider yourself very, very special, because for the most part, I mostly keep those to myself most of the time.

God Bless!

 

[Neogaia777]

I consider my own tears "pearls", so if you ever do get to see them, then you should consider yourself very, very special, because for the most part, I mostly keep those to myself most of the time.

God Bless!

And also in my opinion also, those who cannot control their tears, or don't get to choose when or where/when not to cry, etc, are also the very same people who also seem to have a great deal of trouble in controlling themselves in a lot of other ways/areas most of the time.

God Bless.

 

[trophy33]

And also in my opinion also, those who cannot control their tears, or don't get to choose when or where/when not to cry, etc, are also the very same people who also seem to have a great deal of trouble in controlling themselves in a lot of other ways/areas most of the time.

God Bless.

True.

Most men who cry a lot I know are not very successful in other areas. And are generally weak and in a defeat mode frequently. Having mental problems is not uncommon with them, either.

 

[Neogaia777]

True. Either somebody is emotional or not. Its practically non-existent to be emotional in just one direction.

I think a lot of people basically just lack experience basically. In controlling their emotions or emotional states of mind I mean.

I used to be a very, very sensitive person, and used to cry a lot, or all of the time, but that was only until I got into some life situations where I really should have been crying, but I had no tears left, or the crying stopped, and I finally learned what those tears are really supposed to be for, and how precious, or how valuable they really were, etc, and after that, I didn't cry nearly as much, and don't a whole lot a lot of the time any more now, etc.

Not saying that I never do, as I'm not some kind of monster or something, etc, I am just only saying that they are "a whole heck of a lot different now", and that most of that is due to only having "a lot more life experience now", etc.

God Bless!