There seems to be so much anger in your heart. I doubt it’s healthy for you.atheists don't have an identity of their own, but live as the negation of some thing else. Living as a parasite of sorts only to attack and live on someone else's life. They leach onto religion for their identity, even though they hate religion. Without religion they would have absolutely no power at all. So the thing they hate the most, is crucial for their survival and without it they would have no relevance at all.
I mean a simple google search shows hundreds of cases of scholarly works on the merits and morals of forgiveness:
Handbook of Moral Behavior and Development
I’m sure there’s a Christian support group that you can lean on while you work through this.
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