Am I doing the right thing?

[Scottish Rhiannon]

Hi guys and girls, I'm new here so here is a little bit about myself. I am a single parent of twin 7yr old girls, both of whom are Catholic like myself and attend church every Sunday .

My first post is regarding if I am doing the right thing or am I being harsh. I always make sure that the girls have jackets on before they leave the house, unless it's a very pleasant day because I don't drive. The girls are happy to wear their jackets when its cold, wet and certainly during the winter so that is ok. The problem I get is that they will not zip their jackets up so, after I have asked them to do that and I get no response, I go over to them and do it myself, even at the schoolgate but the girls think that is unfair.

So, what are your thoughts on this issue, what would you peeps do?

 

[HTacianas]

Hi guys and girls, I'm new here so here is a little bit about myself. I am a single parent of twin 7yr old girls, both of whom are Catholic like myself and attend church every Sunday .

My first post is regarding if I am doing the right thing or am I being harsh. I always make sure that the girls have jackets on before they leave the house, unless it's a very pleasant day because I don't drive. The girls are happy to wear their jackets when its cold, wet and certainly during the winter so that is ok. The problem I get is that they will not zip their jackets up so, after I have asked them to do that and I get no response, I go over to them and do it myself, even at the schoolgate but the girls think that is unfair.

So, what are your thoughts on this issue, what would you peeps do?

Hi and welcome to the forums.

Whenever I have had that kind of problem with my son I put him in the position of having to explain himself. Asking "did I ask you to zip your coat" and then "why did you not zip your coat when I asked you to" and then "when you ask me to do something for you do I refuse to do it " usually helps.

 

[Scottish Rhiannon]

Hi and welcome to the forums.

Whenever I have had that kind of problem with my son I put him in the position of having to explain himself. Asking "did I ask you to zip your coat" and then "why did you not zip your coat when I asked you to" and then "when you ask me to do something for you do I refuse to do it " usually helps.

Can I ask how old your son is just so I can gauge if that suggestion will work with my twin daughters?

 

[HTacianas]

Can I ask how old your son is just so I can gauge if that suggestion will work with my twin daughters?

My son is fifteen now. But I treated him that way all his life.

 

[eleos1954]

Hi guys and girls, I'm new here so here is a little bit about myself. I am a single parent of twin 7yr old girls, both of whom are Catholic like myself and attend church every Sunday .

My first post is regarding if I am doing the right thing or am I being harsh. I always make sure that the girls have jackets on before they leave the house, unless it's a very pleasant day because I don't drive. The girls are happy to wear their jackets when its cold, wet and certainly during the winter so that is ok. The problem I get is that they will not zip their jackets up so, after I have asked them to do that and I get no response, I go over to them and do it myself, even at the schoolgate but the girls think that is unfair.

So, what are your thoughts on this issue, what would you peeps do?

I'd just say to them ... it's kind of chilly and you ought to zip up your coat ... because you might catch a cold and get sick ... you don't want to be sick do you? Leave it at that .... if they do get cold enough ... they know how to zip their coats up ;o)

Kids ... seem to have a higher tolerance whether cold or hot or they are just flat not concerned about it. Personally I wouldn't press them on it.

Welcome to the forum and enjoy your stay here.

God Bless.

 

[Scottish Rhiannon]

I'd just say to them ... it's kind of chilly and you ought to zip up your coat ... because you might catch a cold and get sick ... you don't want to be sick do you? Leave it at that .... if they do get cold enough ... they know how to zip their coats up ;o)

Kids ... seem to have a higher tolerance whether cold or hot or they are just flat not concerned about it. Personally I wouldn't press them on it.

Welcome to the forum and enjoy your stay here.

God Bless.

That is ok if it is just cold but what about when its chucking down with rain and their school uniform is getting wet? The last thing I want is for them to be sitting in a class for a few hours with soaking wet uniforms hence why I ask them to zip their jackets, I even ask their teachers to enforceml the same rule?

 

[GodLovesCats]

Are the girls identical or fraternal twins?

I would ask them why they don't care about zipping up their coats.

 

[Ttalkkugjil]

Solve the entire problem. Buy them ponchos - no zippers required.

 

[eleos1954]

That is ok if it is just cold but what about when its chucking down with rain and their school uniform is getting wet? The last thing I want is for them to be sitting in a class for a few hours with soaking wet uniforms hence why I ask them to zip their jackets, I even ask their teachers to enforceml the same rule?

well then ... they would have that/those consequence(s) ... but doing it for them? Nothing wrong with asking them to zip their jackets for this reason or that ... doing it for them is another thing.
Really it's a small choice for them ... are you going to make their choices for them for their entire life (being controlling)? Enforce a rule? root word force ... that's what they are rebelling against. The "force" (although minor) is you zipping up their jackets. Do the teachers zip up their jackets for them if they do not comply?

Certainly there are some very important rules that yeah must be obeyed and yes enforced if everything else without force has been tried and failed, but is this one really all that important? I just think children need to learn to make good decisions for themselves, (especially early on when the consequences will be minor) ... and sometimes that is learned from making not good decisions and experiencing the negative consequences .... just like adults do.

Here's link with some info that may (or may not) be useful to you. Has several different parenting styles.

Overprotective parenting style

God Bless.

 

[sunshine100]

Hi guys and girls, I'm new here so here is a little bit about myself. I am a single parent of twin 7yr old girls, both of whom are Catholic like myself and attend church every Sunday .

My first post is regarding if I am doing the right thing or am I being harsh. I always make sure that the girls have jackets on before they leave the house, unless it's a very pleasant day because I don't drive. The girls are happy to wear their jackets when its cold, wet and certainly during the winter so that is ok. The problem I get is that they will not zip their jackets up so, after I have asked them to do that and I get no response, I go over to them and do it myself, even at the schoolgate but the girls think that is unfair.

So, what are your thoughts on this issue, what would you peeps do?

Hello and welcome,I don't see anything wrong with this,you are just looking out for your kids,and doing what every parent would do for their kids.