Too protective as a parent?

[DZoolander]

So today went out with some family members to celebrate my son's birthday. We got into a discussion about this new movie coming out called "The Meg". Basically it's a shark flick kind of like Jaws - but trying to up the ante by making the killer shark a megalodon.

My sister in law also has a 7 year old (boy - I have a 7 year old girl) - and they're going out to go see it. My daughter wants to see it - and I told her no. I'm not taking her to go see a shark movie where the shark eats a bunch of people. I remember seeing Jaws 2 when I was a kid probably a little older than my daughter is - and there's a scene where Jaws comes out and pulls a helicopter down that's trying to rescue some kids and eats the pilot out from the cockpit.

That freaked me out as a kid - and I still remember getting freaked out by it. So no. I'm not taking a 7 year old to go see a shark eats people movie...lol

No judgment on my sister in law - but it's not what I'm doing.

The conversation then moved on to other movies. Like, for example, "It". She said they watched that together. Now I'm 48, so I'm no longer squeamish about movies, but I watched about the first 5 minutes of "It" a few months back. Got up to the first scene where the Clown Pennywise character bites of some little kids arm and then drags the bleeding kid into a sewer drain and thought "Nope, not for me".

Not that it scared me - just not for me. No way I would show that to my kid. lol

Do you think I'm just overprotective - or does that sound about right?

 

[mama2one]

we use common sense media

if a lot of parent's comments say there is inappropriate language, bullying, violence, etc in a movie then our child won't see it

and a scary movie....no

 

[DZoolander]

Will check it out.

My daughter thinks she's more advanced than she actually is, and wants to see all of these things. Personally, I'm happy with the level of innocence she still has. Heck, she'll watch documentaries with us about mythology, sometimes true crimes, etc...and that freaks her out. Like my wife said they watched some documentary about something called a Mothman (have no idea what it is...lol) and my daughter every night is worried that this Mothman (whatever it is) is going to be breaking into the house.

Yeah - so no - no Megalodon eats a ton of screaming people for her. lol Nor will there be any kids with their arms getting bitten off before being devoured by a clown movies seen in my home any time soon.

 

[mama2one]

at school this past yr, some of the kids were telling our child about movies they've seen

for about a month, she was asking me if Chucky and ghosts were real and if everyone would die on Fri 13th

I wish other parents would be more careful about what they let their kids watch!

 

[DZoolander]

I knew this other lady that would watch Game of Thrones with her 6 year old.

Now Game of Thrones is a series that is actually up my alley. I think it's probably the best show on TV. But ya know, I wait until my kids are asleep before I watch it.

 

[Sabertooth]

My wife and I just don't do gore (as entertainment) as adults. We certainly don't invite our kids to do so. It isn't a matter of maturity. It is traumatizing and/or desensitizing for people of any age.*

I had to steel myself just to treat some childhood lacerations when they occurred. I have heard that even ER doctors get grossed out by some of these movies (probably due to their context).

*I wouldn't be surprised if it contributes to childhood PTSD.

 

[DZoolander]

Yep.

Going back to the Game of Thrones show. Lots of people I know say it's the sex stuff that makes them not want their kids to see it. While I can sympathize to that to some degree (I mean it's certainly not a selling point to showing it to my kids...lol) - it's the GORE that makes me not want my kids to see it. There are a few episodes of the show that I simply won't watch again, because I saw it the first time, it bugged me, and that was that.

 

[DZoolander]

And I'm not a squeamish person. I can deal with cuts, blood, injuries, etc. But sometimes the violence can be so wanton and grotesque that I just don't want to see it again.

 

[Sabertooth]

Even with my distaste for gore, I seem to be able to handle the autopsies of procedural shows. I guess it goes back to context.

 

[PloverWing]

The goal, for scary movies and TV, is to watch shows that are scary in a fun way (like roller coasters) and that aren't scary in a deep-down I'm-really-afraid way. That line is different for different people, at different points in their lives. As parents, we get the job of guessing where that line is for each of our kids when a movie comes out.

All three of our kids, at some point in their young childhood, saw something on TV that was upsetting to them, to the point that they had trouble falling asleep afterwards. (For one, it was a Doctor Who episode. For another, it was a Pooh video where Piglet loses his mittens. Different boundaries for different people.) That was useful to us, as a way of explaining to our kids why we wouldn't let them watch some things. We could explain that, while your thinking brain knows that what's on TV is pretend, your emotions sometimes still react as though it's real. Remember that time when you couldn't sleep after you saw <old TV show>? We think that <new TV show> is going to be bad-scary like that one for you, instead of fun-scary, so we don't want you to watch it until you're older.

The line between bad-scary and fun-scary changes as they age. My child who was distressed by Piglet's mittens is now a teenager, and we've watched Game of Thrones together, and he's fine. But maybe an explanation of bad-scary and fun-scary will help your 7-year-old, or at least let her know you're not just being a mean parent.

 

[Hammster]

So today went out with some family members to celebrate my son's birthday. We got into a discussion about this new movie coming out called "The Meg". Basically it's a shark flick kind of like Jaws - but trying to up the ante by making the killer shark a megalodon.

My sister in law also has a 7 year old (boy - I have a 7 year old girl) - and they're going out to go see it. My daughter wants to see it - and I told her no. I'm not taking her to go see a shark movie where the shark eats a bunch of people. I remember seeing Jaws 2 when I was a kid probably a little older than my daughter is - and there's a scene where Jaws comes out and pulls a helicopter down that's trying to rescue some kids and eats the pilot out from the cockpit.

That freaked me out as a kid - and I still remember getting freaked out by it. So no. I'm not taking a 7 year old to go see a shark eats people movie...lol

No judgment on my sister in law - but it's not what I'm doing.

The conversation then moved on to other movies. Like, for example, "It". She said they watched that together. Now I'm 48, so I'm no longer squeamish about movies, but I watched about the first 5 minutes of "It" a few months back. Got up to the first scene where the Clown Pennywise character bites of some little kids arm and then drags the bleeding kid into a sewer drain and thought "Nope, not for me".

Not that it scared me - just not for me. No way I would show that to my kid. lol

Do you think I'm just overprotective - or does that sound about right?

I think you are doing just fine.

 

[Bumble Bee]

So today went out with some family members to celebrate my son's birthday. We got into a discussion about this new movie coming out called "The Meg". Basically it's a shark flick kind of like Jaws - but trying to up the ante by making the killer shark a megalodon.

My sister in law also has a 7 year old (boy - I have a 7 year old girl) - and they're going out to go see it. My daughter wants to see it - and I told her no. I'm not taking her to go see a shark movie where the shark eats a bunch of people. I remember seeing Jaws 2 when I was a kid probably a little older than my daughter is - and there's a scene where Jaws comes out and pulls a helicopter down that's trying to rescue some kids and eats the pilot out from the cockpit.

That freaked me out as a kid - and I still remember getting freaked out by it. So no. I'm not taking a 7 year old to go see a shark eats people movie...lol

No judgment on my sister in law - but it's not what I'm doing.

The conversation then moved on to other movies. Like, for example, "It". She said they watched that together. Now I'm 48, so I'm no longer squeamish about movies, but I watched about the first 5 minutes of "It" a few months back. Got up to the first scene where the Clown Pennywise character bites of some little kids arm and then drags the bleeding kid into a sewer drain and thought "Nope, not for me".

Not that it scared me - just not for me. No way I would show that to my kid. lol

Do you think I'm just overprotective - or does that sound about right?

I feel much the same as you. I do not like the idea of my son watching anything gory, violent, or crude, because I want him to grow up learning and absorbing good morals. I don’t want him to become desensitized to the types of behaviors shown in those movies.

 

[Bumble Bee]

I won’t even allow him to watch cutesy vampire shows. There’s just something not right about a child watching a show with a vampire sleeping in a coffin and decorating with skeletons. No vampirina, monster high, or any of that for my kids!

 

[Paidiske]

Funny story about parenting and Game of Thrones...

So when Game of Thrones first came out, my husband watched it and I wasn't interested. So I was vaguely aware that it was medieval-ish fantasy but not of the tone of it, iykwim.

When Zoë was really little - I'm talking about not walking yet - I used to put on a kids' DVD for her, to amuse her long enough for me to be able to shower in peace etc. And one day I couldn't find the DVD I wanted, but Game of Thrones was in the machine; I pressed play, watched part of the title sequence and I thought, "Oh, that's pretty harmless, I'll let her watch five minutes of that." And went off to shower.

Came back to a scene in a brothel that was - um - definitely not child-friendly!

(Disclaimer: sleep deprivation may have had some part in that decision making process!)

On a more serious note, I find it very hard to predict what will and won't freak her out. We watched Aladdin with her and she became very distressed at one point where Jasmine is stuck in an hour glass (from which she is rescued). I mean, heaving sobs, big-meltdown distressed. I would have thought Aladdin would have been pretty reasonable, really!

 

[JIMINZ]

I have found, Spiritual discernment concerning our children if of the utmost importance.

What I hear you saying and the way you have said it, I believe your discernment is in good working order.

Think about this, Satan has managed to invade our very homes where we are to be safe, he has done it through movies, and TV.

Think about your house and how safe it is, then think about the movies where someone has bee horribly butchered in ever single room in the house, from the basement to the attic.

Then there are the places we go, amusement parks, beaches you name it and we find the same thing, dark streets, alleyways, in you car in the woods, you get the picture (no pun intended).

If you think about it, I am sure we can all come up with something we saw which even now bothers us, is that just us, or was it Satan implanting fear, because fear hath torment.

To be honest, it bothers me to swim even in a pool by my self, Guess Why.

 

[HannahT]

So today went out with some family members to celebrate my son's birthday. We got into a discussion about this new movie coming out called "The Meg". Basically it's a shark flick kind of like Jaws - but trying to up the ante by making the killer shark a megalodon.

My sister in law also has a 7 year old (boy - I have a 7 year old girl) - and they're going out to go see it. My daughter wants to see it - and I told her no. I'm not taking her to go see a shark movie where the shark eats a bunch of people. I remember seeing Jaws 2 when I was a kid probably a little older than my daughter is - and there's a scene where Jaws comes out and pulls a helicopter down that's trying to rescue some kids and eats the pilot out from the cockpit.

That freaked me out as a kid - and I still remember getting freaked out by it. So no. I'm not taking a 7 year old to go see a shark eats people movie...lol

No judgment on my sister in law - but it's not what I'm doing.

The conversation then moved on to other movies. Like, for example, "It". She said they watched that together. Now I'm 48, so I'm no longer squeamish about movies, but I watched about the first 5 minutes of "It" a few months back. Got up to the first scene where the Clown Pennywise character bites of some little kids arm and then drags the bleeding kid into a sewer drain and thought "Nope, not for me".

Not that it scared me - just not for me. No way I would show that to my kid. lol

Do you think I'm just overprotective - or does that sound about right?

You know your child, and you know your experiences. I see smart parenting - not overprotective IMO.

Kids can be odd about movies - just like adults can!

My oldest is now 24, and when she was little? Wizard of Oz and Charlotte's Web scared her to death. Yet, when I brought them to a drive in when Dad was out of town? The Disney film they loved, and I put them down in the back of the van for bed while I watched the 6th sense. They were young, and went out like a light no matter where we were! So I had my MOMMIE time! The end of the movie came, and she pops up from the back of the van...and tells me, "He was DEAD the whole time Mommie?" Sigh. She loved that movie. lol!

Jaws scared my brother to death. He refused to take a bath or go into a pool that whole summer. He was forced into the bathtub of course, but either me or my mother had to stand outside the bathroom in case he came UP via the drain!

The devil's triangle scared me 1/2 to death! That was on television one night, and my mother giggled years later that nothing ever scared me she felt...until that night!

 

[Babe Ruth]

DZ, As a parent, when I'm doubting whether my kid can/could handle something (entertainment related). I follow my gut, and skip that movie or show.
My opinion, the worse that could happen is they have to wait a little, & watch it in the future. I'd never feel bad for asking my kids to delay watching people die gruesome deaths at the hands of serial killers, sharks, demented clowns, etc..
Peace.

 

[HannahT]

DZ, As a parent, when I'm doubting whether my kid can/could handle something (entertainment related). I follow my gut, and skip that movie or show.
My opinion, the worse that could happen is they have to wait a little, & watch it in the future. I'd never feel bad for asking my kids to delay watching people die gruesome deaths at the hands of serial killers, sharks, demented clowns, etc..
Peace.

I agree. I think I was a teenager when Exorcist came out. It made the news as people were fleeing the theaters, and refusing to go back in to finish watching the film.

So, of course being a silly teenager....I wanted to GO! Mother told me I was dreaming if I thought she would allow that. It was a bummer at the time, but I lived thought it.

 

[mina]

You have to do what you think is right for your child as a parent . It doesn't matter what others are doing. We were anti screens for a while and now we only watch Daniel tiger or some cartoon based on a book. I have no regrets. And I'm not going to let my kid watch things that are questionable or not age appropriate . It might be cute or fun to let them watch things; but I'd rather teach kids to be smart about what they fill their mind with.

 

[NothingIsImpossible]

I feel whatever the parent decides is up to them. They tend to know how their kids may handle something. If I had a 7yo daughter I don't think I'd let her see the meg. It may be PG-13, but if you look at the details it says:
"Rated PG-13 for action/peril, bloody images and some language"

Which means the Megs gonna be chewing up people, maybe not super gory. But bloody enough that I wouldn't let my kid watch. And honestly Megladons are MASSIVE. It could traumatize a kid for a long time about going into the water. Even if you tell them Megs are long gone.

The MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe) is a good example of what to and not to take kids to. I'd take my kid to see Antman. But NOT Avengers Infinity War, its to rough for a little kid I think. Plus the themes will be way over their head.

To any parents wondering what EXACTLY is in a movie (like literal words telling you). When you go to IMDB you can click the "Parents Guides: Content Advisory" and it will bring you to a page of a break down of every scene that is in the movie that gave it its rating. This way you can see if there are any scenes you should worry about. For example heres Mission Impossible Fallouts advisory:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt4912910/parentalguide?ref_=tt_stry_pg