12-year-old boy suspended for staring at girl

[Nithavela]

This sounds like a minor issue on all fronts. The boys were only suspended for one day other some rudeness and SHOULD be back at school learning stuff. They are loosing far more valuable learning time over this bruhaha.

 

[iluvatar5150]

I was bullied mercilessly at that age. When my son was performing years ahead of his peers I waited until Middle School to skip him. If I couldn't take those years away entirely, I'd take away at least one year. My son is now grown and swears he will home school his kids when they reach that age.

I was bullied quite a bit and skipped two grades. While I understand the appeal of homeschooling through those years, I'm skeptical that many parents are equipped to handle subject material that starts to get more advanced, and I'd never skip a kid unless there was some seriously compelling reason to do so, like the kid was a genuine prodigy. Putting him into college early isn't helpful - it's better to make the work in high school more difficult so that he's better prepared when he gets to college.

 

[DaisyDay]

The female student said the boys cornered her in a classroom closet.

Link

The boys may very well have been "just playing" but the girl apparently didn't see it that way. Perhaps they didn't realize she would feel intimidated being cornered by two boys; they may not have seen it as cornering even. Now either they'll take into consideration the other person's perspective or they'll be bitter and angry and entitled.

A one day suspension really isn't that big of a deal especially at age 12.

 

[Gadarene]

Link

The boys may very well have been "just playing" but the girl apparently didn't see it that way. Perhaps they didn't realize she would feel intimidated being cornered by two boys; they may not have seen it as cornering even. Now either they'll take into consideration the other person's perspective or they'll be bitter and angry and entitled.

A one day suspension really isn't that big of a deal especially at age 12.

I suspect they have learned a lesson about entitlement. Just not any entitlement on their part.

 

[havevisions]

I'm not defending anyone, but if you read carefully the boy's letter of apology, he did say that he would not try to intimidate anyone again. Isn't that an admission of guilt?
Also, perhaps the school is trying to send the message that any kind of purposeful intimidation is wrong.
You can't blame them for that.
Again, I'd like to know more details of exactly what happened, as far as his motivation for his "staring".

 

[Gadarene]

I'm not defending anyone, but if you read carefully the boy's letter of apology, he did say that he would not try to intimidate anyone again. Isn't that an admission of guilt?
Also, perhaps the school is trying to send the message that any kind of purposeful intimidation is wrong.
You can't blame them for that.
Again, I'd like to know more details of exactly what happened, as far as his motivation for his "staring".

Maybe he wrote that because it's expected of him

 

[Nithavela]

I bet that he was told to write that, and went along with it.

Doesn't mean that he didn't do it, but I wouldn't see it as an admission of guilt. Children are succeptible a try to say what they think adults want to hear, you can't take their words the same way you take an adult's.

 

[Gadarene]

I bet that he was told to write that, and went along with it.

Doesn't mean that he didn't do it, but I wouldn't see it as an admission of guilt. Children are succeptible a try to say what they think adults want to hear, you can't take their words the same way you take an adult's.

This could also explain how someone apparently happily taking part in the same game allegedly felt intimidated

 

[Nithavela]

This could also explain how someone apparently happily taking part in the same game allegedly felt intimidated

I think that the public needs to stay out of this matter and let the people who actually know the boys and girl and the circumstances sort this out.

Gotta say though, 12 year old girls generally don't play in games with boys of their age.

 

[smaneck]

I was bullied quite a bit and skipped two grades. While I understand the appeal of homeschooling through those years, I'm skeptical that many parents are equipped to handle subject material that starts to get more advanced, and I'd never skip a kid unless there was some seriously compelling reason to do so, like the kid was a genuine prodigy. Putting him into college early isn't helpful - it's better to make the work in high school more difficult so that he's better prepared when he gets to college.

I have the same reservations about homeschooling myself in general. I could not have homeschooled my son because his math skills were better than my own by the time he was eight. Yes, my son was prodigy. He understood prime numbers, multiples and factors before he started kindergarten and doing square root problems when he was six. He was always several grades ahead of his peers but I deliberately waited to skip him until he reached Middle School. If you are going to take away a year of a kid's life, take away one of those years. Even then the teachers resisted saying he wasn't emotionally or socially mature. I told them, "You don't get mature socially or emotionally by being tormented." Fortunately he was in the gifted program which legally is Special Ed. When a school receives federal monies for Special Ed they are required to teach the child at their challenge level. What is the challenge level of a thirteen year old with an ACT of 32 and an SAT of 1390?
In any case, he went to a private prep school for high school and it was the best thing I could have done for him. The school slogan was "where it is cool to be smart." He finally started to make friends and he ended up taking 12 AP courses.

 

[TerranceL]

I think that the public needs to stay out of this matter and let the people who actually know the boys and girl and the circumstances sort this out.

Gotta say though, 12 year old girls generally don't play in games with boys of their age.

I knew a few girls who played with the boys around that age. One of them liked to sucker punch then run away.

 

[Trogdor the Burninator]

Once upon a time the children in this case would have gotten sent to the principals office, maybe gotten the cane once or twice, maybe been given a detention and been returned to class. Now in the age of kids rights and helicopter parenting, kids are suspended, miss out on school and it all ends up in a court case.

Ahhh progress.

 

[rambot]

I see a lot of folks who are TOTALLY out of touch with school environments.
Fact is that the school environment we attended is no longer the school environment that kids attend to.

If intimidation is a suspendable offence, the school is WELL within their right to do so. IF this girl was feeling intimidated, then yes, that should have happened. It's kinda tough for schools who have to deal with bullying and then, in an attempt to DEAL with bullying get decried by people on internet forums as whatever posters here are moaning about.

 

[Hetta]

Once upon a time the children in this case would have gotten sent to the principals office, maybe gotten the cane once or twice, maybe been given a detention and been returned to class. Now in the age of kids rights and helicopter parenting, kids are suspended, miss out on school and it all ends up in a court case.

Ahhh progress.

It's not helicopter parenting to not want your kids 'chastised' with a wooden stick.

 

[rambot]

Let me say this: I love...LOVE LOOOOOOOVEEEE that people being jerks (there are far better words I'd rather use) are now getting called on it.

I'm going to trust that the school administrators who have a much closer connection to this story, are using sound judgement and, while I do think a suspension may be a bit harsh, I was not there to get a firm grasp on what happened.

 

[Gadarene]

I think that the public needs to stay out of this matter and let the people who actually know the boys and girl and the circumstances sort this out.

Public is going to hear about ridiculous cases like this one - problem would be solved by not giving boys silly punishments for nothing

Gotta say though, 12 year old girls generally don't play in games with boys of their age.

Really depends on the boys and girls in question.

 

[Gadarene]

I see a lot of folks who are TOTALLY out of touch with school environments.
Fact is that the school environment we attended is no longer the school environment that kids attend to.

If intimidation is a suspendable offence, the school is WELL within their right to do so. IF this girl was feeling intimidated, then yes, that should have happened. It's kinda tough for schools who have to deal with bullying and then, in an attempt to DEAL with bullying get decried by people on internet forums as whatever posters here are moaning about.

Slight flaw in your analysis - this isn't bullying though.

And more generally, scarcely the first time a female claims to be intimidated over virtually nothing.

 

[Gadarene]

I knew a few girls who played with the boys around that age. One of them liked to sucker punch then run away.

you must have intimidated her somehow to deserve that

 

[TerranceL]

you must have intimidated her somehow to deserve that

Oh naturally.

 

[ThatRobGuy]

The boy must have given something more along with that look. Having been a sub-teacher I can say that boys from fifth to eight grades can be a real pain in the , well you know. Junior High boys and girls are very stubborn and teachers that teach Junior High should get combat pay!

It's because everyone's child is a "special little snowflake" and can do no wrong...didn't you know that???