How to eliminate geeks from my dating pool

[Toro]

Yes, because we all know that anyone who plays a video game is a lifeless scumbag. The generalizations on this board have gotten beyond ridiculous.

I don't think it is whether someone plays video games (from what I read at least, haven't read it all yet) but how seriously they take it.

Me for example, I have a ps3 but I am a casual gamer..... I pick it up as a last resort to boredom. My ps3 collects more dust than games. Nothing wrong with those types.

The ones who spend 24/7 playing them in a costume they bought off ebay while plaing the game..... its.... a bit much. Pretending to be a superhero when you are 5 is normal. Pushing 30.... not so much.

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

Yes, because we all know that anyone who plays a video game is a lifeless scumbag. The generalizations on this board have gotten beyond ridiculous.

You know what I love about this talk about gamers? It shows that either people have not paid attention to what I have written beyond one word, or that they have started their own discussions and moved on from what I said.

 

[gracefullamb]

I am not trying to be rude, but do you get asked out enough that you have to arbitrarily eliminate potential dates with something superficial like he plays video games or watches anime?

I would think it would be more important to find someone who shares the same beliefs and goals as you then worry about frivolous things like what he ranks as his hobbies.

 

[GQ Chris]

funniest video ever - YouTube
Give geeks a chance.

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

I am not trying to be rude, but do you get asked out enough that you have to arbitrarily eliminate potential dates with something superficial like he plays video games or watches anime?

I would think it would be more important to find someone who shares the same beliefs and goals as you then worry about frivolous things like what he ranks as his hobbies.

There is a difference between someone who watches one or two shows and someone who would go to a convention for the genre or spend hours and hours on it. This affects lifestyle and values. I want someone I could build a life with, not just a date. Dating isn't about getting whatever decent date you can get: it's about finding the one you can spend a lifetime with.

If you watch that geek dating show, the first episode posted here, one geek was saying that dating another geek is nice because you would be with someone who understands spending hours painting a shield. I want to be with someone who understands not wanting to spend hours on a shield like that. And yes, if I wanted to date someone like that, I know a couple guys I probably could have dated.

 

[Sweet Melody]

 

[Christianman79]

Say " you are the weakest link. Goodbye"

 

[gracefullamb]

There is a difference between someone who watches one or two shows and someone who would go to a convention for the genre or spend hours and hours on it. This affects lifestyle and values. I want someone I could build a life with, not just a date. Dating isn't about getting whatever decent date you can get: it's about finding the one you can spend a lifetime with.

If you watch that geek dating show, the first episode posted here, one geek was saying that dating another geek is nice because you would be with someone who understands spending hours painting a shield. I want to be with someone who understands not wanting to spend hours on a shield like that. And yes, if I wanted to date someone like that, I know a couple guys I probably could have dated.

I don't even know what you are writing about in your second paragraph because I don't own a TV. I own dvds but I watch those on my laptop and sure wouldn't waste my time or money on "reality" garbage.

As far as the first paragraph goes apparently you decided to ignore the second part of my post. If you are looking for a spouse and not just a date, then you should start by looking for the person that shares your beliefs, values, and goals and where such a person is likely to be at. Go from there, go to places a person who shares your faith is going to socialize at. Starting with how not to find someone whose hobbies you don't like isn't going to get you a potential husband, it is going to get you just what you said you don't want, just a date.

 

[GQ Chris]

You know you're into men who are into cosplay.

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

I did not ignore your other paragraph, but still...

I don't even know what you are writing about in your second paragraph because I don't own a TV. I own dvds but I watch those on my laptop and sure wouldn't waste my time or money on "reality" garbage.

If you ever do want to spend a moment, I saw the first episode. This is from page 3 of this thread-no TV required.

Clearly none of you have seen the show "Geek Love" lol. That is the most awesome show about geek dating iv ever seen. You have to watch it . Its just soooooo funny.

Geek Love season 1 episode 1 - YouTube

Geek Love season 1 episode 2 - YouTube

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

You know what, so many people don't seem to get why I want someone whose culture I can relate better to, so I'm just going to make another thread.

 

[RebornBen]

Why not just stop making them instead if we're all so ignorant.

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

Why not just stop making them instead if we're all so ignorant.

Because every once in a while, someone gets it (like maybe I want to date someone who both has Godly values and isn't the same kind of guy over and over again i.e. a geek who either has been to an anime convention or who would enjoy it) and that person is helpful.

 

[gracefullamb]

Because every once in a while, someone gets it (like maybe I want to date someone who both has Godly values and isn't the same kind of guy over and over again i.e. a geek who either has been to an anime convention or who would enjoy it) and that person is helpful.

I think more of us get it than you believe, especially since you were advised to avoid conventions. That would eliminate a huge part of the dating pool that qualify as geeks right there. Honestly though, I think if you focus more on finding someone who shares your faith you would do better. A man who is pious and spiritually strong, who is growing in his faith isn't so likely to be spending his time doing something like dressing up like a comic hero, cartoon character etc. and hanging out at convention. Eventually as one grows in their faith the focus becomes less secular things or things that distract us from God, or it should if we are truly growing.

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

I think more of us get it than you believe, especially since you were advised to avoid conventions. That would eliminate a huge part of the dating pool that qualify as geeks right there. Honestly though, I think if you focus more on finding someone who shares your faith you would do better. A man who is pious and spiritually strong, who is growing in his faith isn't so likely to be spending his time doing something like dressing up like a comic hero, cartoon character etc. and hanging out at convention. Eventually as one grows in their faith the focus becomes less secular things or things that distract us from God, or it should if we are truly growing.

It seems like a number of people here are just defending geeks, saying I should not avoid geeks, etc. I've dated geeks. I don't feel I can respect as a future spouse those that are very heavily into the subculture because our values and we spend our time/live are very different.

While on the one hand I agree with you about a guy growing in his faith, on the other hand, I have met a guy who was a minister in the goth/anime/punk/something else subculture area (my calling is a very different kind of ministry than this). I also found a guy who dresses up as a comic hero on some occasion and still leads in a youth group at his church.

Outside of another group who don't want to join me for a cool ethnic church thing (and I don't want to drive that far out to go to their kind of place). These are the main kinds of church-going Christian guys I have been exposed to much in contrast to those who: don't go to church, sleep around, get drunk a lot, etc. deal-breakers. The alternative guys I could meet seem so much more conservative about less important things than I am or that I know how to be spiritually healthy around instead of legalistic.

 

[Toro]

It seems like a number of people here are just defending geeks, saying I should not avoid geeks, etc. I've dated geeks. I don't feel I can respect as a future spouse those that are very heavily into the subculture because our values and we spend our time/live are very different.

While on the one hand I agree with you about a guy growing in his faith, on the other hand, I have met a guy who was a minister in the goth/anime/punk/something else subculture area (my calling is a very different kind of ministry than this). I also found a guy who dresses up as a comic hero on some occasion and still leads in a youth group at his church.

Outside of another group who don't want to join me for a cool ethnic church thing (and I don't want to drive that far out to go to their kind of place). These are the main kinds of church-going Christian guys I have been exposed to much in contrast to those who: don't go to church, sleep around, get drunk a lot, etc. deal-breakers. The alternative guys I could meet seem so much more conservative about less important things than I am or that I know how to be spiritually healthy around instead of legalistic.

Not sure how old you are but maybe going older would help? I have never met any of these guys you speak of so maybe it is a generation thing?

(I am not saying this to try and "hook up" just saying this so maybe my interest will help you avoid the "geek" guys.)

Cars (Mostly go to drag races but love all sorts of car shows and races)

Poker (okay probably not best advice as you could end up with an alcholic or compulsive gambler easy)

Football (geeks usually avoid sports, which is kind of odd since there are a few that like to dress up/paint up in something equally as odd as a superhero costume)

Autoparts stores (okay I have meet some pretty odd folks there but I doubt they are into the cartoon stuff.)

Places like home depot.... etc. (Customers not employees, nothing against people working there, but apparently these geeks are every where, employees must be crossed off the list in all places as they must fund their "geeky" interests some how.

I could suggest other places that wouldn't have geeks but you wouldn't likely end up with a guy you like any better.

 

[Ana the Ist]

How/where should I meed guys who are not geeks? (Playing RPGs or video games occasionally with absolutely to expectation that I will play as well is tolerable. but not most of geek subculture.)

These guys (typically) go after girls they are comfortable with, girls they don't feel will judge them. If you work on your image a bit, you'll probably be too intimidating for any of them to think they stand a chance with you. The look you want to go for is very fashion-forward, sophisticated, sexy, and on-the-go. If at a glance, you appear to be one of those women who has her life together, knows what she wants, and is primarily concerned with her future, then most of these guys will assume you're wayyy out of their league. They probably won't approach you because (let's face it) these aren't the type of guys who aggressively go after a girl they would consider a "challenge".

I know I'm assuming you aren't already a girl with the look I'm describing. If I'm wrong, feel free to bite my head off.

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

These guys (typically) go after girls they are comfortable with, girls they don't feel will judge them. If you work on your image a bit, you'll probably be too intimidating for any of them to think they stand a chance with you. The look you want to go for is very fashion-forward, sophisticated, sexy, and on-the-go. If at a glance, you appear to be one of those women who has her life together, knows what she wants, and is primarily concerned with her future, then most of these guys will assume you're wayyy out of their league. They probably won't approach you because (let's face it) these aren't the type of guys who aggressively go after a girl they would consider a "challenge".

I know I'm assuming you aren't already a girl with the look I'm describing. If I'm wrong, feel free to bite my head off.

There is always room to re-focus my wardrobe. I'm actually working on cleaning out some old clothing soon. If your any kind of fashion wiz, message me.

 

[Niels]

Hooray for stereotypes. Although they can contain a grain of truth, they can also be misleading. I have some geek cred (my career is in IT, my musical taste ventures into the obscure, science interests me, I enjoy comics... admittedly newspaper style rather than the superhero variety... and I read SF/fantasy among other things) but that doesn't stop me from bathing or being a reasonably fit car guy who frequents hardware stores on a regular basis. I even count mountain biking and surfing among my interests. Including the college years, I've also basically lived on my own since mid '90s. So much for the "greasy unmotivated basement dweller who needs to go outside" stereotype.

I'd love to find a woman who is geeky in a similar vein. Those bereft of geekiness are too boring.

These guys (typically) go after girls they are comfortable with, girls they don't feel will judge them. If you work on your image a bit, you'll probably be too intimidating for any of them to think they stand a chance with you. The look you want to go for is very fashion-forward, sophisticated, sexy, and on-the-go. If at a glance, you appear to be one of those women who has her life together, knows what she wants, and is primarily concerned with her future, then most of these guys will assume you're wayyy out of their league. They probably won't approach you because (let's face it) these aren't the type of guys who aggressively go after a girl they would consider a "challenge".

I know I'm assuming you aren't already a girl with the look I'm describing. If I'm wrong, feel free to bite my head off.

Does this mean that she'll have to stop dressing as a catgirl and going to comic conventions?

 

[Daughter of Ararat]

Hooray for stereotypes. Although they can contain a grain of truth, they can also be misleading. I have some geek cred (my career is in IT [actually, this is more nerdy], my musical taste ventures into the obscure [right on], science interests me, I enjoy comics [hooray for not saying cartoons]... admittedly newspaper style rather than the superhero variety [thank God]... and I read SF/fantasy among other things) but that doesn't stop me from bathing or being a reasonably fit car guy [few outside of my workplace talk about cars, unless they are Armenian or something] who frequents hardware stores on a regular basis. I even count mountain biking and surfing among my interests [nice and not geeky-in that order, but knowing sports seasons and being involved in them in some small way is sexier-and completely lacking in anything that ever came up with any guy I have ever dated-even for a first date]. Including the college years, I've also basically lived on my own since mid '90s [good for you]. So much for the "greasy unmotivated basement dweller who needs to go outside" stereotype. [I've met worse, trust me, also not the stereotype I want to avoid, though it is a good one to avoid]

I'd love to find a woman who is geeky in a similar vein. Those bereft of geekiness are too boring.


Does this mean that she'll have to stop dressing as a catgirl and going to comic conventions?

Well, I guess you and I are just not meant to be.

Don't worry. I stopped attending anime conventions with friends when I realized I stopped appreciating anything but the bulkiest-squishiest costume designs and a couple Asian style souveniers and I knew nothing about the anime stuff there, but the costume... well... sometimes a girl just likes the feel of something black and fitted... Meow!

Yay, I made a "____st thread"!