Advice on Teens---finding friends

[moonkitty]

I have a kid brother—I was 16 almost 17 when he was born. I was out of the house and married by the time he started first grade. Now there has been times when he was a kid, when he would come and stay with me and my hubby—but he has been living with mom out of state for the last 6 years, so I haven’t had daily interactions with him as a teenager. The last time he stayed with me he was 8 years old.

So I got a call last night, he wants to come and spend the summer with me and my family. I talked it over with my Hubby and he isn’t against it as long as my brother follows certain rules like no loud music, no smoking ect….

My biggest concern is friends. He doesn’t really know anybody in my state—or at least not anyone his age. I will like for him to make some friends while he is down here so that he will have people his own age to talk to—but where do I take him to make new friends? My own kids are still young—9 and 11 so managing their friends is still pretty easy. There are some teenagers in my neighborhood—but I don’t know them well and I’ve heard some not so nice rumors about them. I don’t know if these rumors are true, but this is my kid brother and my mom has warned me that in the past he has tried to run with the rougher crowd before—and wants me to be aware of this. I want to keep him out of trouble and away from any negative influences.

So what I would like advice on is where can I take him to help introduce him to kids his own age. Any other advice on taking care of teenage boys will be appreciated as well.

 

[CelticRose]

Sport? Is there some sort of supervised club that offers a variety of activities under supervision? Police citizens does it out here but depending on interests a chess club is quieter. Or ask your local homeschool group. They usually know what activities are available in an area. That's the only way I can think offhand he might be able to make friends quickly.

 

[Samuel_Rigby]

Church is always a good choice. Maybe contact your youth pastor and have him visit your brother personally. The youth pastor could introduce your brother to some of the other youth his age who would be a good influence on him.

 

[BeanMak]

I wouldn't worry too much about him making friends by you. He might really enjoy being an "older brother" to your kids. It will give him a chance to do "kid" things again. Plus it will give him a chance to play grown up to be your companion and talk. I would go stay with my grandmother when I was that age, and I was really too shy to want to meet new people by her. I just wanted to visit with her.

 

[moonkitty]

Sport? Is there some sort of supervised club that offers a variety of activities under supervision? Police citizens does it out here but depending on interests a chess club is quieter. Or ask your local homeschool group. They usually know what activities are available in an area. That's the only way I can think offhand he might be able to make friends quickly.

Thank you. I haven't thought about the local police league--I do believe they have summer sports for the local teens. I think he would enjoy that. I'm not sure about chess club. He is not a quite kid, LOL.

 

[moonkitty]

Church is always a good choice. Maybe contact your youth pastor and have him visit your brother personally. The youth pastor could introduce your brother to some of the other youth his age who would be a good influence on him.

Thank you for your reply. I don't go to church myself, so I do not know any youth pastors. And to be honest I haven't really talked to my kid brother about if he goes to church or not. Of course he can attend chruch here if he wants.

 

[moonkitty]

I wouldn't worry too much about him making friends by you. He might really enjoy being an "older brother" to your kids. It will give him a chance to do "kid" things again. Plus it will give him a chance to play grown up to be your companion and talk. I would go stay with my grandmother when I was that age, and I was really too shy to want to meet new people by her. I just wanted to visit with her.

Thanks for you reply, but I do know one thing about my bro---he is far from shy. While I do believe he will have fun with my kids, he is still a VERY outgoing guy and will make friends with anyone. THat is why I am concerned that he will not make friends with kids who will get him in trouble. He has a knack for finding trouble.