April 26, 2010
Well I spent the majority of the day feeling ill, I think my husband and I got the flu. Still feel a little ill but not as bad as this morning.
I think I have been looking at this all from the wrong point of view. I have been looking at things through the flesh and not the spirit. My flesh self feels abandoned because I have not felt Gods presence for so long, and I have tried to do everything I could think of to get closer to God. I know God would never abandon me and he would never leave me so I am going to hold on as long as I can but I just fell like God is ignoring me for whatever reason, and that is a hard place to be, I have been here in this place more times than I care to mention, it feels so helpless and lost. I am searching and seeking the light because that is all I can do at this point. there is only five more days in this fast and it is drawing to an end really quickly, I am just lost and confused and not really sure what to think. Oh well....
Well I spent the majority of the day feeling ill, I think my husband and I got the flu. Still feel a little ill but not as bad as this morning.
I think I have been looking at this all from the wrong point of view. I have been looking at things through the flesh and not the spirit. My flesh self feels abandoned because I have not felt Gods presence for so long, and I have tried to do everything I could think of to get closer to God. I know God would never abandon me and he would never leave me so I am going to hold on as long as I can but I just fell like God is ignoring me for whatever reason, and that is a hard place to be, I have been here in this place more times than I care to mention, it feels so helpless and lost. I am searching and seeking the light because that is all I can do at this point. there is only five more days in this fast and it is drawing to an end really quickly, I am just lost and confused and not really sure what to think. Oh well....
