So, my husband and I recently started learning about autism and aspergers.
This came about because I was reading a post about it on Facebook. As I was reading the post, I thought to myself that everything in it seemed normal to me. All of it was things that I've experienced and are my normal. I said this to my husband, in a really poorly worded and hateful way. I told him that I didn't believe it was a real problem, they weren't describing a mental difference, merely personality traits. My husband grew really upset with me over my comments, told me to really research the disorders (is that the right word?), and then tell him what I thought of it.
So I did. I have been researching for three months now. Everything I have come across has astonished me. All of it. I started obsessing over it. I couldn't stop reading everything I could get my hands on about the autism spectrum. I related to so very much. I started watching videos aspies would post on youtube describing their life, experiences, and diagnosis. I cried through almost all of them. I never before found people who thought the way that I do. Now I can't get it out of my mind.
I feel scared because we don't have much money, so I can't just go to a doctor to figure this out, but my husband and I have found that the amount of "symptoms" I have is astounding. There's just so much. I haven't been able to talk to anyone other than my husband about it because I don't want anyone to think I'm "crazy". I don't want anyone in my family to think less of me. But it's nagging at me, it explains so much in my life, so much about my personality, it explains all that is me.
I'm honestly just looking for encouragement. I just don't even know what to do from here because we can't afford to go to a professional about it. I wouldn't even know what to say to them if I could. I don't know how to deal with this possibility. I don't know any adult who is. The only person I know who is autistic is 5. I'm 25. Before I even knew this kid was autistic, I saw myself in him. His mother apologized to me because of a fit he threw, but I told her not to worry about it because I did the same thing as a kid. She looked at me so strange when I said that.
I don't know what I'm getting at, but I think what I'm really looking for is someone who was diagnosed as an adult to talk to. I really need someone to talk to about this. Please?
This came about because I was reading a post about it on Facebook. As I was reading the post, I thought to myself that everything in it seemed normal to me. All of it was things that I've experienced and are my normal. I said this to my husband, in a really poorly worded and hateful way. I told him that I didn't believe it was a real problem, they weren't describing a mental difference, merely personality traits. My husband grew really upset with me over my comments, told me to really research the disorders (is that the right word?), and then tell him what I thought of it.
So I did. I have been researching for three months now. Everything I have come across has astonished me. All of it. I started obsessing over it. I couldn't stop reading everything I could get my hands on about the autism spectrum. I related to so very much. I started watching videos aspies would post on youtube describing their life, experiences, and diagnosis. I cried through almost all of them. I never before found people who thought the way that I do. Now I can't get it out of my mind.
I feel scared because we don't have much money, so I can't just go to a doctor to figure this out, but my husband and I have found that the amount of "symptoms" I have is astounding. There's just so much. I haven't been able to talk to anyone other than my husband about it because I don't want anyone to think I'm "crazy". I don't want anyone in my family to think less of me. But it's nagging at me, it explains so much in my life, so much about my personality, it explains all that is me.
I'm honestly just looking for encouragement. I just don't even know what to do from here because we can't afford to go to a professional about it. I wouldn't even know what to say to them if I could. I don't know how to deal with this possibility. I don't know any adult who is. The only person I know who is autistic is 5. I'm 25. Before I even knew this kid was autistic, I saw myself in him. His mother apologized to me because of a fit he threw, but I told her not to worry about it because I did the same thing as a kid. She looked at me so strange when I said that.
I don't know what I'm getting at, but I think what I'm really looking for is someone who was diagnosed as an adult to talk to. I really need someone to talk to about this. Please?