I'm a GenX dealing with modern children.

[Autumnleaf]

I'm getting old but my children are young. My older children are turning out okay. The younger ones, I'm not so sure about. The older ones didn't like me but I think they trusted me. The younger ones respect me but they see strong willed. Whatever to do?

 

[Verve]

All children are different. I don't think your "generation" has nearly as much of an effect as some people claim.

Though you may find better advice in the parenting forum.

I'm a millennial without kiddos.

 

[DZoolander]

I'm a Gen X'er - and I like the millennial group. They're far superior to the Boomers - who I would argue are the worst...generation...ever. Hands down.

 

[Autumnleaf]

I'm a Gen X'er - and I like the millennial group. They're far superior to the Boomers - who I would argue are the worst...generation...ever. Hands down.

The boomers were a product of their time. After WWII the world was bombed out except for the US. So the world bought manufactured goods from US factories. Lots of high paying jobs for boomers right out of high school/college. As the rest of the world reindustrialized with new more efficient factories and cheaper labor they ground US manufacturing into the dust. Some boomers and silent generation leaders outsourced jobs as government funded retirement grew into the expensive situation it is now. Gen Xers came on the scene as good jobs were getting scarce and millenials are coming on the scene as bad jobs are getting scarce.

I'd argue genx and millenials would act like boomers if we grew up when they did under those circumstances.

 

[HannahT]

We had children late, and I think we are some of the last group that was considered boomers. I wasn't suppose to have children due to female issues, and God blessed me with two naturally anyway! Woo HOO!

I will say - compared to my parent's generation - I tried to stay as open minded as I could. My parents were overall pretty cool with conversations other parents wouldn't touch with a 10 foot pole, and other conversations? They clearly were not comfortable with.

Some of the circumstances - and questions - they come to me with? I can picture my parents freaking out about, but I know the conversation NEEDS to be done. I try to show no reaction, but my stomach is turning. Due to their age (young adults at this point) I try very hard to speak to them calmly and frankly. The judgmental tone is pretty much muted. Thankfully, I trust my kids to do the right thing. They don't go off partying, being obnoxious, etc.

If you are open minded enough they also can teach you new ways of looking at things, and of course like all humans in some areas....lol not so much! Like my parents before me I try to present both sides, and remind them at times you just need to accept that people are NOT always going to think the same way about everything. Its not time to freak out, attack, and call names that you see today. Its time to figure out a way of working with it the best you can. I'm speaking generally here...not something illegal.

As they have got older? Now we have their friends that don't have such a great relationship come to us for advice. They get the same approach. We tend not to just tell them WHAT to do, but WHY it is necessary. At times you need to find ways of explaining things differently, because you need the light to come on! Then I have to do my best to accept them as they are, and learn to let go...now that they are adults. Learn to cringe, but allow them to be what they grew to be. Overall? They are awesome individuals. Not entitled, Good work ethic, and respectful.

So far? The only thing I can remember really freaking about? My 21 yr old came home with a cat tattoo on her ankle. She knew the freak out was coming, and was trying to calm me down. (Sigh) If that is the worse she does? I can live with it. What the heck is it with this kids and tattoo's? Yuck!

 

[faroukfarouk]

We had children late, and I think we are some of the last group that was considered boomers. I wasn't suppose to have children due to female issues, and God blessed me with two naturally anyway! Woo HOO!

I will say - compared to my parent's generation - I tried to stay as open minded as I could. My parents were overall pretty cool with conversations other parents wouldn't touch with a 10 foot pole, and other conversations? They clearly were not comfortable with.

Some of the circumstances - and questions - they come to me with? I can picture my parents freaking out about, but I know the conversation NEEDS to be done. I try to show no reaction, but my stomach is turning. Due to their age (young adults at this point) I try very hard to speak to them calmly and frankly. The judgmental tone is pretty much muted. Thankfully, I trust my kids to do the right thing. They don't go off partying, being obnoxious, etc.

If you are open minded enough they also can teach you new ways of looking at things, and of course like all humans in some areas....lol not so much! Like my parents before me I try to present both sides, and remind them at times you just need to accept that people are NOT always going to think the same way about everything. Its not time to freak out, attack, and call names that you see today. Its time to figure out a way of working with it the best you can. I'm speaking generally here...not something illegal.

As they have got older? Now we have their friends that don't have such a great relationship come to us for advice. They get the same approach. We tend not to just tell them WHAT to do, but WHY it is necessary. At times you need to find ways of explaining things differently, because you need the light to come on! Then I have to do my best to accept them as they are, and learn to let go...now that they are adults. Learn to cringe, but allow them to be what they grew to be. Overall? They are awesome individuals. Not entitled, Good work ethic, and respectful.

So far? The only thing I can remember really freaking about? My 21 yr old came home with a cat tattoo on her ankle. She knew the freak out was coming, and was trying to calm me down. (Sigh) If that is the worse she does? I can live with it. What the heck is it with this kids and tattoo's? Yuck!

HannahT: They do the tattoo thing after 18 as a sort of rite of passage.

It's a bit like how teens (and their moms) would get double / triple pierced ears 30-35 years ago.

 

[HannahT]

HannahT: They do the tattoo thing after 18 as a sort of rite of passage.

It's a bit like how teens (and their moms) would get double / triple pierced ears 30-35 years ago.

I feel ripped off then! Mother never pierced her ears EVER!

Although I see what you are saying...

 

[faroukfarouk]

I feel ripped off then! Mother never pierced her ears EVER!

Although I see what you are saying...

HannahT: So did your good mom think that bare earlobes were more 'virtuous'. or something like that?

 

[HannahT]

No. She had clip-ons!

She did tease me when I got my double pierce, "Don't you have enough holes in your head?!"

"Ha HA! Mom! Very funny!"

I have double pierce, but didn't go beyond that.

 

[faroukfarouk]

No. She had clip-ons!

She did tease me when I got my double pierce, "Don't you have enough holes in your head?!"

"Ha HA! Mom! Very funny!"

I have double pierce, but didn't go beyond that.

Well, the double pierce 35 years ago was maybe just a teeny bit daring when it started; but now is entirely established as the way to go for so many ppl, anyway.

A little tattoo is now kind of similar, I guess. Maybe was a bit edgy for those who first started the trend, but now after a sea change in parlor developments - often more like salons than the old, dingy tattoo parlors of generations ago - it's what a lot ppl, including Christians who find witness ink effective, seem to get because it's become the way to go for so many ppl.

Blessings.

 

[Hetta]

I'm getting old but my children are young. My older children are turning out okay. The younger ones, I'm not so sure about. The older ones didn't like me but I think they trusted me. The younger ones respect me but they see strong willed. Whatever to do?

Did you mean to say that they "seem" strong willed? I wasn't sure what to make of your question so will assume that's what you mean.

I have kids ranging from 22 (almost 23/almost married) to 14, and they are all strong willed. Age doesn't seem to make a difference. I'm glad that they are strong willed, because being easily swayed/weak doesn't generally work out well. I have butted heads with every single one of them at different times (not literally of course) where their desire to go their own way has conflicted with mine and their dad's desire for them to do what we say - but what we say has always been what we know to be the best for them.

The good thing is that I remember clearly being a teenager/young adult myself, and being so sure that I knew already everything I needed to know, and that parents just didn't get it. I remember my mom saying to me something that translates as "you cannot put an old head on young shoulders" (I hope that makes sense) and I often think of that now when I have a difference with one of my children, and I recall my own feelings and thoughts at their age/s. That helps me to try to get into the same mindset and also to understand that they are feeling their way towards independence. As parents, it's always difficult to let go and let them make mistakes. (I am not talking about serious/dangerous mistakes). We want them not to be hurt, not to mess up, but one thing is sure - no matter what time of mankind you care to look back upon - young people have always had to learn by experience how to survive to become old people. There is simply no short cut, and no substitution.

My modern children are just fine. They have more than I ever had, but then I had more than my parents had, and my parents had more than their parents had, etc etc. My grandchildren will have more than their parents had, and their children ... etc. And each generation thinks they did it best, and the younger generation is worse than theirs. LOL. That's how it has always been and probably always will be until the end of time.

 

[HannahT]

Yes, my kids are strong willed to a point as well. We have taught them to NOT just go along with everything, because some authority told you its a must. Don't believe everything you are told, but to check out yourself ... to be sure. Basically, make sure you know what you are getting yourself into.

One year when they were both in high school they had a run in with administration. Administration handed out all these rules and regulations, and they were told they had no choice but to sign on the dotted line their agreement to them. Both the kids refused to sign them, and they were sent to the Dean's office. In the Dean's office they listening to him scream at them how they are 'required' to do so. They told him they didn't agree with some of the rules, and found them unjust. How if they signed they were giving away their rights, and they were not going to do that. My son told him after he was done screaming that forcing someone to sign something was coercion - which is illegal. The school's police officer came in (I was told giggling under his breath) stating my son had a point, and sent them back to class.

They never signed it. I never saw it until after the fact (the form they wanted signed), and YES that year they placed all this crazy stuff in the form. I wouldn't have signed it either. I met the officer later that year - at a village festival - and he told me they were calm as cucumbers and the Dean was having a tantrum.

I also never got a call from the Dean's office, and they never got in trouble over it. Intimidation tactics don't always work.

I realize that sound rebellious to some, but I was proud of them. You don't ever sign your rights away.

 

[sdmsanjose]

BY EZ
I'm a Gen X'er - and I like the millennial group. They're far superior to the Boomers - who I would argue are the worst...generation...ever. Hands down.

EZ, what is so wrong with boomers?

 

[DZoolander]

By far - at least within the scope of generations I've had experience with - they are the most self-centered, selfish, short sighted and hypocritical.

When I was growing up - I used to really like the boomers. I looked at the time of the 60's and early 70's, how they challenged the establishment, etc...and I thought that there was a period of enlightenment that went on then. While I may not have agreed with all of their stances, I gave them credit for things like protesting the Vietnam war, bringing conscientious objection to the national stage, challenging potentially harmful traditions, etc.

But as I've grown older and watching them - my perception of what actually guided their actions has changed. They weren't led by some arching principle of fairness and/or ensuring that America only got into "just" conflicts. They weren't led by some grand sense of inner-reflection that led them to challenge established norms. Rather - it was far simpler.

They were simply selfish.

They challenged the Vietnam war because they didn't wanna go. No more, no less. Had they been confronted with something like WWII (which arguably was far more noble of a cause) - I think you would've ended up with the same types of nonsense. They wouldn't have enlisted there, reported for the draft, etc. So, the boomers don't get any bonus points for objecting to Vietnam - as in my eyes the fact it was a crappy war was only circumstantially part of the equation. They were far too busy banging around with each other, doing drugs, living hedonistic lifestyles on the dime of their parents and being cowardly to get any bonus points there. You don't get any credit for being right accidentally in my eyes.

Then you get things like the sexual revolution - etc.. They weren't led by some grand sense of introspection there. They simply wanted to bang around.

Then you get into areas like how they were the beneficiaries of a more altruistic generation (the Silent generation) - yet seem completely unaware of it (or they are aware of it and are just jerks...either way doesn't fly with me)...

For example - my sister is a boomer. She moved out of the house when she was 18 - and put herself through college at UCLA all the way through her graduate degree funded 100% by a part time job at the YMCA. How was she able to do that? Because tuition was like $125 per quarter when she was there - maybe $180 after you factored in books.

Why was tuition so low, comparatively speaking (and factoring in for inflation)? Because the previous generation saw value in investing in our university system through taxes. Back then - most colleges were supported 70-80% through taxes. Nowadays - it's not unusual to find that universities only receive 8-10% of their operating budgets from the state/taxes.

Why is that? Because boomers hate taxes. Boomers hate the idea of investing in someone else. Boomers hate "socialism" - even though they were the recipients of it. These jerks run around talking about how they "pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps" (with their $125 tuition - mind you) - and lament about why little Johnny can't do the same thing with his $12k per quarter tuition.

Ehhh - they bug me - on so many levels.

When they were young - everything was selfishly motivated. War, sex, this, that, etc...they took. Now that they're old - it's still all selfishly motivated - insofar as they react violently to any kind of giving.

 

[Hetta]

IJWTS that I am considered to be a boomer, but I am none of those things. I do believe strongly in taxes and am fine with the fact that my taxes help those in need. But the range for boomers include those born in the early sixties, and we were in no way recipients of free love and Woodstock when we were only 5 or 6 years old. In fact, I don't feel at allied to the hippy side of things - it all happened before I was at all aware of it.

 

[HannahT]

IJWTS that I am considered to be a boomer, but I am none of those things. I do believe strongly in taxes and am fine with the fact that my taxes help those in need. But the range for boomers include those born in the early sixties, and we were in no way recipients of free love and Woodstock when we were only 5 or 6 years old. In fact, I don't feel at allied to the hippy side of things - it all happened before I was at all aware of it.

I remember my mother putting me in bell bottom pants, and watching them interrupt my Saturday morning cartoons to talk about the war.

Then of course the death counts each night on the news.

I was kid too. My folks were always very generous, and we really didn't have that much. Mother was the reason teachers in our state got decent wages, and she fought that fight for YEARS!

 

[DZoolander]

IJWTS that I am considered to be a boomer, but I am none of those things. I do believe strongly in taxes and am fine with the fact that my taxes help those in need. But the range for boomers include those born in the early sixties, and we were in no way recipients of free love and Woodstock when we were only 5 or 6 years old. In fact, I don't feel at allied to the hippy side of things - it all happened before I was at all aware of it.

There are always exceptions But that's how I view the boomers in general. You're also not an "American" boomer by birth...lol

 

[favoritetoyisjoy]

There are always exceptions But that's how I view the boomers in general. You're also not an "American" boomer by birth...lol

And if she had been born in America the same would be true, just as it was for so very many of us who were.

 

[DZoolander]

Once again - there are exceptions... but pretty much all of the "Keep Government out of Medicare" people, the FOX News addicts, etc... are boomers. My opinion of them as a group stands. When they were young and had nothing - they were all about "taking". Now that they're old and have something - they're all about "keeping". lol

 

[favoritetoyisjoy]

I hope I see a significant improvement in American society in my lifetime. If my children's generation can/will do better, that would be awesome. All any generation had/has to do is practice what is described in 2 Chronicles 7:14. Even boomers can't thwart God, so don't anyone hold back.