I'm really glad that attitudes have changed. I remember sitting with a girl I didn't know very well who was a nurse in the 80s. She had some patients with AIDS, and said that they deserve what they get.
One of my friends told me that his parents stopped talking to him for 5 years.
As for my parents, after I came out, they grew very distant, and never again acknowledged it. We grew apart. After about 20 years, they have finally come around, about a month before my Dad died this year. I think it was really hard for my parents to understand, because they didn't want to discuss it, and my mom would listen to the 700 Club, and hear Pat the Evil Leprechaun say how 9/11 wasn't just the cause of gay people, but of someone she knew, her son.
I often think that the insistance that "gay is a choice", and that "the bible says homosexuality is wrong" tends to break up families, rather than Focus On them, often by spreading misinformation, and sometimes outright lies.
I lived with a lot of fear, a lot of guilt, because of my parents. It felt pretty bad to have them sometimes suddenly start forgetting my birthday, not ask me home for Christmas, or the uncomfortableness they would show when we would go to church, and someone would ask me if I was married yet. At 45, I think that they can figure it out on their own, and it will give the tiny church something to gossip about.
I really wish my parents had been there for me when I was coming out to myself, realizing that I was gay, knowing how much guys in the locker room would talk about how much they hated gay guys (or even straight guys that they judged effeminate). I struggled with the biblical verses surrounding it, and would have loved to have their support figuring it out. For a long time, I thought my parents were ashamed of me, despite the fact that I am very well spoken, am a talented teacher, and a very loving person, and I believe that they were. Now, I now I know that they are, but we missed out on a lot of years, and now they are close to the end of their journey.
It is wonderful to hear this kind of OP, and makes me feel that the struggles for Gay Rights and Gay Visibility produced understanding, and even celebration of a parent who may potentially have a gay child. Thanks for that.