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I can't feel God anymore

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by Megann*, May 11, 2010.

  1. Megann*

    Megann* Newbie

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    I used to have such a strong relationship with him about 2 years ago and it was amazing. Then later I began dating they guy who claimed to also be a christian but one thing led to anyother and we ended up having sex and I moved in with him.

    Then, since about January I started feeling God talking to me. Like he really wanted to have a relationship with me again and he wanted to help me. So I told my boyfriend and since then we have been trying to have sex less. Now I can't feel God at all. I pray and ask him to help me stay away from temptation and ask for a relationship with him and to let me feel him again, but I get nothing. I know that God doesn't always answer our prays with what we want, but it's really starting to hurt me, I'm feeling very abandond.

    I try to read and pray everyday and not have sex. My boyfriend is planning on proposing to me very soon and we even talk about getting married emediatly after so we're not living in sin anymore. I know my boyfriend wants a better relationship with Christ too. He says he can feel God with him though, and since I can't that kind of hurts. I don't understand why he can feel christ yet he doesn't read the bible or pray, but I do and I can't feel him.

    I feel like God can't hear me anymore or doesn't want me. I'm so lost :(
     
  2. RobertZ

    RobertZ New Member

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    Ephesians 4:30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

    How do we grieve the Spirit of God? by living in willfull sin and not obeying his promptings. How can you expect to feel Gods presence if you are grieving his spirit? He is likely hiding his face from you because you have grieved him, God does this in extreme cases to get us to pull out of sin and turn back to him.

    Hebrews 12:6 FOR THOSE WHOM THE LORD LOVES HE DISCIPLINES, AND HE SCOURGES EVERY SON WHOM HE RECEIVES."

    Revelation 3:19 I correct and discipline everyone I love. So be diligent and turn from your indifference.


    Be glad that God is making you miserable right now for its evidence that you truly do belong to him. If you were able to go on in sin and feel no remorse over it then that would be a bad sign.

    Hebrews 12:8 If God doesn't discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all.

    Its starting to hurt you? how do you think God feels about you doing things that he doesnt agree with? Trust me I speak from experience when I tell you that as long as you are going against his will you can expect to feel abandoned.

    Satan can also appear as an angle of Light (2 Corinthians 11:14), im not saying your boyfriend is not saved but you need to be aware of this and so does he.



    Satan never presents sin as it really is. He never presents both sides of the story, pro and con. He presents only what he wants us to see, something that appears fun and exciting. He wants us to focus on pleasure, on what feels or looks good at the moment. He wants long-term consequences to be the last thing on our minds while he entices us to sin.


    Satan wants us to be comfortable in our sins, the last thing he wants us to do is for us to really look at our standing with God as God commands us to do.

    2 Cor 13:5 Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves.


     
    Last edited: May 11, 2010
  3. salida

    salida Veteran

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    Its not about feelings because they change no matter what we do but about action. Praying daily and reading the bible is how one gets closer to God.

    Your boyfriend doesn't pray? How can one have a friend and not talk to them? So, how can one not pray and know God? This isn't possible.

    We can't keep sinning. God wants us to be in this world but not of it.

    I would take one day at a time and when u have a relationship with God then u can spiritually hear his voice.
     
  4. RobertZ

    RobertZ New Member

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    Yes and Amen. :)
     
  5. Megann*

    Megann* Newbie

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    Thanks guys for your help. I'll definitly take your advice and just try to take it one day at a time :)
     
  6. CJ Williams

    CJ Williams Newbie

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    Hi Megann,
    I'd suggest you read the Bible and pray with your boyfriend everyday, and make a promise to each other to get closer to Christ as you get closer to each other. Doing this will strengthen your relationship to the Lord AND your boyfriend, and put you both on the right track in wanting to live a life together that glorifies God. Blessings to you!
    CJ
     
  7. DominiLady

    DominiLady Servant of God

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    Very interesting what everyone has said.
    Remember, God should always be our priority.
    'The person who fritters away the early morning in other pursuits than seeking God will make poor headway seeking Him the rest of the day.' E.M. Bounds
    Pray, Pray Pray!
     
  8. Lindros09

    Lindros09 Guest

    God should be your main desire, by your post it seems that letting go of your boyfriend is not an option. Perhaps that is where you need to start since it is making you sin. If you truly belong to the Lord he will discipline you, one of those ways is conviction. I get this feeling that you want God but you don't want to sacrifice anything, you cant serve two masters.
     
  9. ChildOfGod97

    ChildOfGod97 Regular Member

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    Honestly, though a lot of people can not accept this, many people do not see marriage itself as being important in terms of a ceremony, but in the heart. They can feel married even if they have not had a ceremony and genuinely consider themselves married. No wonder there are "common law marriage" laws in place in many states.

    But not everyone can accept that, and so they are effectively living in sin. It does not take long to go and get a marriage certificate. It is a very simple process. If you put it off because you want a bigger ceremony, consider this: What is more important? Your conscience and stance with God, or a ceremony? But, consider another point as well: you can still have that ceremony as a renewal of vows anytime you wish, and so please both families.

    Really, if you two are committed to each other, plan to stay together for the rest of your lives, then you are doing as God intended you to do. What many couples do is live together and they keep "their options open". They do not get married because their hearts are not committed to their partner. They are essentially adulterous and impure in heart.


    It doesn't seem like that is your case, so you are fortunate.

    Go and get the marriage certificate, then.


    You have an obligation to persuade your partner to do that.

    If you really want it, make it easy for him, and do not let up... how can he refuse?
     
  10. wayfaring man

    wayfaring man Veteran

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    Dear Megann ,

    I believe it would be best for you to take a break from being boyfriend / girlfriend . And then seek The Lord without the conflict of interest or unholy distraction .

    Then if after a few weeks , you begin to sense The Lord's Presence again , that will affirm you've done the right thing - for if getting into this uncertain relationship led to The Lord's Presence abating , getting out ( at least temporarily ) should lead to His recognizable Presence being restored .

    Also get the impression that the talk of marriage is partly due to guilt + rationalization of what continues to be a questionable relationship at best .

    You're still quite young , marriage suits mature individuals , because it challenges us to be unselfish , hence people who marry selfishly , in immaturity , have much difficulty , and usually don't endure for long .

    After The Lord's Presence is tangibly restored , then you should sense better whether to consider dating / marriage again .

    It doesn't sound like you and your bf are currently on the same spiritual wavelength , therefore , think it's better to try separating for a while , to seek The Lord individually .

    May The Lord's Presence Become Clearer as we to Him draw nearer .

    wm
     
    Last edited: May 12, 2010
    BelovedLight likes this.
  11. Megann*

    Megann* Newbie

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    Thanks all again, you've given me lots to think about.
     
  12. Peripatetic

    Peripatetic Restless mind, peaceful soul.

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    First of all, don't assume that there is a 100% correlation to your sexual behavior. It may well be a factor, but it may not be that simple. Guilt about it can also be destructive if you have feelings of condemnation. There may also be other factors like pride and greed which are in every one of us.

    You are right in taking it one day at a time. Like any relationship, your journey with God will have ups and downs, and it will change over time. Take time to pray, try to read the Bible (preferably with some kind of devotional to compliment it), and let the Holy Spirit do His thing.
     
  13. wayfaring man

    wayfaring man Veteran

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    Consider -

    Flee fornication. Every sin that a man does is without the body; but he that commits fornication sins against his own body. <-----> 1st Corinthians 6:18

    ********************************************************************
     
  14. Tenacious_Believer

    Tenacious_Believer Still Learning

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    [youtube]f-iN6ONVZGc[/youtube]

    God is there always. Don't forget that. Read the Bible, listen to encouraging music, pray, and you will hear him.
     
  15. Jpark

    Jpark Contributor

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  16. Phil1992

    Phil1992 Newbie

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    Megan,

    You need to talk to your boyfriend about this and possibly a pastor in a church you went to. If he is a christian and you are in relationship with him, I think he would understand. God may want you to give up the relationship because you are having sex or he might want you to work it out with your boyfriend. KEEP YOUR FAITH UP, listen to Gods word and what he wants best for you.
     
  17. Yukatan

    Yukatan Newbie

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    I went through a similar experience a long time ago, when I was dating a non-Christian.

    First off, have you ever asked whether being with your boyfriend or marrying him is God's will? What does the Spirit lead you to do? From my own experience, I purposely ignored/rebelled against the Spirit, and one day it felt as though the Spirit left me... I didn't feel God at all and it was easily the worst experience in my life. That went on for six months.

    The purpose of marriage and a relationship is to glorify God, and isn't just about pleasing each other or being in love. If the relationship isn't built upon that principle, then it won't glorify God. Aside from the sexual intimacy, another red flag is that he professes to be a Christian but doesn't read the bible or pray. The key question to ask in considering a marriage partner is this: would my partner help me to grow closer to God? If the answer is no, then most likely that means God does not want you to be in that relationship. A relationship esp ought to be God-centered.

    wayfaringman is giving GREAT advice, and I know because I went through the same thing as you did years back. Marriage is one of the most important decisions you can make, and making that decision without a sense of God's leading or the Spirit is a very very, very dangerous thing. You might really regret it. I *really* wanted to marry this one girl who wasn't a Christian, she did too... but I knew the relationship was compromising my faith. She eventually became a Christian, but the relationship still wasn't glorifying to God. I couldn't feel God's leading because of the emotional turmoil, so I took a 1 year break. She moved on to another guy in 6 mos, but later on I knew it was the right decision.

    The other question is this: from your post it sounds like you're saying you "try not to have sex"--does this mean it still happens? If so, you need to do everything you can to stop it. If you can't stop it while being together, that means you'll have to take more extreme measures, like taking a break, avoiding places of possible privacy, etc. Marrying isn't necessarily the answer, because the physical intimacy can really cloud judgment... especially spiritual discernment. Regardless of what practical measures you take, I think you need to restore your Spiritual compass before making a decision as huge as marriage.

    Remember that God is the most important thing in your life. The more you put your bf in front of God, the more the presence of God will be numb, absent--I'm saying that from personal experience. I really feel for your predicament, and pray that God would guide you, and that you'd be able to hear His voice again. Know this: that even though you don't feel Him, He is there. He will always be there.