Family traditions?

[mamaneenie]

Hi I am just wondering if anyone has any traditions in their family. Also, how do you feel about them?

My mother in law (who I love dearly, she is a strong Christian and has always been there for my husband, son and I) seems to insist that we have lunch at her place every Sunday afternoon. This was OK when we were living with her (as we were there already), then when we moved out we were on that side of town, about 5 mins away. It was also good when my son would go down for his nap in the spare room, there is a portacot all set up there and some of his toys, so he was happy. However, we weren't really going to church every Sunday (that is another story) and it was OK, I didn't mind spending Sunday with everyone. My brother-in-law and his wife are there every week too.

Now that we are going to church every Sunday, we live 20 mins away, some Sunday evenings my husband has to work, and my son doesn't nap every day, it is just becoming too hard every week. I am begining to find it a real drag to be out all day, then my husband has to go to work. There is no time for us to hang out just the 3 of us. I have had the last 2 weekends free, with no Sunday lunch as we have had dh boss for lunch the first weekend, last weekend was my son's birthday. I explained to my mum in law, that I wasn't coping with every Sunday, she just didn't seem to understand. Yes this Sunday we are heading over there. She is so excited and said "now things can get back to normal" However next weekend we have another birthday party and a Christmas party. No way am I going to mum in laws for lunch.

I know things are going to change, I am going to be an Aunt in January (they are living with mum in law as they are broke and can't afford to rent) so my son won't have his spare room to nap in if he needs to, as the new baby will be in there. Not only that, I am sure my sis in law, is probably going to want to try and have some space. She has been asking me for how to be a good mummy advice, that is really strange because 2 years ago, it was me asking everyone about what it is like to be a mum.

I am not necessarily asking for advice, but if you've got some, send it my way! I just need to vent a little. Thanks for reading this if you've got this far. lol

 

[Stuart Elflett]

Hi Mamaneenie,

I can relate to your situation... We have a few family traditions, and a few family situations too... the two seem to relate quite closely...

Both sets of parents were very used to having their 'baby' for Christmas... my side were OK with us spending one day with them and the other with the 'in-laws', but my wifes side saw anything less than *CHRISTMAS* with her as a personal affront... and as there was a good 150km's between the two, Christmas was actually becoming a chore when we were still in Queensland...

These days we visit fairly rarely - if they get to see us at all, it's a reward - my mother has been quite generous and helped us get up there with the kids a couple of times, and the other parents know that, but bring in the 'wish you'd visit us while you're here' statements afterwards - I feel we kind of owe the visit to my mother though... that gives us a good family 'situation' too...

We've started some traditions... Daddy always gets a soap on a rope from his kids for Fathers Day... things like that...

Peace be with you...
Stuart

 

[mamaneenie]

We've started some traditions... Daddy always gets a soap on a rope from his kids for Fathers Day... things like that...

Peace be with you...
Stuart

That is exactly my issue with the whole thing. I feel like we are our own family now and need to start setting our own identity and what we like to do. Instead of just going along with it. I have asked my husband what he thinks of it all, and he basically said "whatever you decide I will support" That is great with some things, but it is his mum, not mine!!! Grrrrr, I am at the end of my rope on this one. Also, the next few weeks are going to be busy with Christmas parties and more birthday parties. We have 4 parties over the next 2 weekends. eeek!!

The other thing is that my family who live 1 hour drive away, we hardly ever see them. I had lunch with my dad today. He hasn't seen my son for 6 mths. they had a great time together too.

 

[Stuart Elflett]

Well they do say you can choose your friends, but not your family...

(And, to think of it, you can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friends nose...) )

Peace be with you...
Stuart

 

[mamaneenie]

Thanks, that made me laugh. Just the thing I need.

 

[mamaneenie]

I think I am getting stressed out, because there is so much to do, just before Christmas, and sometimes I wish it would all go away. I love the new year though. I love Christmas, but there is so much activity and so much money spent. I am trying to make Christmas presents, but there is only so many hours in the day.

 

[Stuart Elflett]

Several people are going to get framed photographs, and the family will get nice calendars from us, as I've got the material to do those!! It's a time of year that has become so over commercialised it's not funny - luckily some of us know what we're celebrating, right...

Peace be with you...
Stuart

 

[Bevlina]

A tin of bikkies always does the job at Xmas too! They come in handy at the barbie! Danish shortbread's are always on special at this time of year too! Only 99c a tin on special at the Supermarket this week!

 

[mamaneenie]

My husbands family are full on Charismatic born again Christians, so don't really care that much about pressies. My family is religious Christian. High Anglican. They are aware of the meaning too. I just feel bad if people give me something cool and I can't give them anything cool back.

I am making rum balls and homemade cookies. Also, will be making photo frames (out of fabric, lace and cardboard - I can explain more if you are interested) I will also be knitting scarves and beanies (I've already started these, as they take some time to do) Also, I plan on getting the wooden plaques and stuff that bargain shops sell and painting them up and sticking bits and pieces on.

 

[mamaneenie]

A tin of bikkies always does the job at Xmas too! They come in handy at the barbie! Danish shortbread's are always on special at this time of year too! Only 99c a tin on special at the Supermarket this week!

Yummy, which supermarket is that?

 

[Bevlina]

IGA. Have you got one near you? It's all we have in our little town but it's a good place to shop. I love rum balls. It only takes a little imagaination to do alot. I like to look at nice clean Op Shops for books on how to make things. And it's amazing what people give to them in the way of handicraft items to work with.

 

[mamaneenie]

IGA. Have you got one near you? It's all we have in our little town but it's a good place to shop. I love rum balls. It only takes a little imagaination to do alot. I like to look at nice clean Op Shops for books on how to make things. And it's amazing what people give to them in the way of handicraft items to work with.

I think I am the op shop queen. I would love to tell you of the bargains I have picked up from op shops. A lot of things if you look around are pretty new and cost hardly anything. I have bought new t-shirts from op shops they still have the tag in, sometimes for 50c. How is that for cool. My son is getting a Thomas the Tank Engine puzzle from an opshop - it looks brand new and cost me half of what it would cost in Kmart or something. I know that sounds cheap, but on one income when almost half our money goes on rent, it is a blessing. I love craft. I sometimes find that books are in the library as well.

 

[Bevlina]

Well...at the Op Shop today, I bought the most gorgeous Sussan set one could find. Brand new! $10 for the dressing gown & nightie. Pale pink lawn & all embroidered. I have found amazing things at the Op Shop. All the money from our's goes to the local Hospital. Also, when shops close down they send surplus stock to the Op Shop. Aren't we lucky! Yes, there are lots of books on craft at the library. And that's cheaper still. Zilch. I love to embroider & find heaps of beautiful laces at the Op Shop. Hoops, cottons, wool, clothes, new shoes ($1 a pr at our's) Everything a person could ever wish for is at the Darling old Op Shop. We treat our's as the local Emporium. Books! It would take a month of Sunday's to go through them! I'm an addict.... ....to Op Shop's.