When I was facing back surgery nearly four years ago, my doctor told me that there was a 70% chance it would reduce my pain enough for prescription pain meds to work, and a 30% chance the surgery would make no difference or make it worse. My own research had turned up the same likelihood.
But praise God, He healed my back miraculously and instantly.
I guess his doctor wasn't as blunt...or he wasn't paying attention.
And there might be a factor of medical debt after unsuccessful surgery as well.
There's a reason I consider major surgery a thing to deliberate. Not all surgeons are the same.
My wife had brain surgery. A procedure called a micro vascular decompression. It's not the most complicated brain surgery but it is invasive. What do I know about brain surgery? It's usually done in the skull.
The specialist we had been seeing openly admitted that they had an in house surgeon who did this, but was inexperienced, my wife was in her mid 20s....she recommended a guy far away whom she graduated with and was out of our network. My insurance will still pay 80% on out of network providers.
When we finally met this guy its a discussion. Medical history, symptoms, severity, what to expect....and then the scary part...everything that can go wrong including death. He gets a little ways into this list...and I can see my wife getting scared.
So I interrupt him. I had a feeling he was the right guy, not too young in his career to make new mistakes....not too old to be on autopilot. So I tell him something like this...
I know you're legally required to tell us this, and I'm going to let you finish, but I'd like to ask you a question first...
I know there's no certainty in these things. You can't make any promises. But if I were just some guy....some stranger who was your neighbor....and after telling me about this upcoming surgery, I asked you how confident you were that it would be successful...what would you say?
This is a carefully phrased hypothetical so that he can tell me how good he feels about the procedure without any later legal trouble. His response was, and I'll never forget it...
I'm 99.9% certain there won't be any problems. I've done hundreds of these procedures. If I were bragging, I'd tell you I could do it in my sleep...but I don't like bragging.
Wife was reassured, surgery was successful, and still extremely expensive, but I never doubted we made the right choice. I'm glad the specialist was honest and recommended a different surgeon, and I'm glad he understood what I was asking....because I still no next to nothing about brain surgery.
Sometimes the legal concerns, the constant stream of patients, causes these professionals to detach themselves emotionally from the patients (not an inherently bad thing) and they stop talking to you like you're a human. Sometimes you have to give them an opportunity to step outside that....see you as someone who is unsure about the very risky and expensive decision you're making. Be your own advocate.
