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You Might Be A Redneck If - Clean

1John5:3

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Oct 12, 2003
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LOL!
 
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lonestar1

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357magnum said:
You might be a redneck if...(#6)
You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are "Play Ball..."

I know a different version of this one... It goes:

You might be a redneck if you think the last for words of the National Anthem are, "Gentlemen, Start Your Engines!"

Another one:

You might be a redneck if you've ever written Richard Petty's name on a presidential ballot
 
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U

Uzi_4_U

Guest
Does any one know any " You might be Russian if.." jokes?
I'll take a shot at making some up:

You might be a Russian if...

-you put the Vodka bottle in the fridge to unfreeze it on those cold winter mornings
-you have ever had to light a fire under your car to get it started
-you take showers in a fur cap
-you refer to the Mafia as an honest business
-you wonder how anyone can live without caviar
-you refer to your enemies as 'dirty capitalist pigs'
-you don't understand why people have to wear haevy layers of clothes in winter
-you have ever had your savings account's value go from a lot to almost nothing back to a lot on the same day
-if you have ever said someone deserves to be banished to Siberia
-you refer to you neighbor as comrade
-you refer factor bribes as part of your income
-you think that giving the police money will help them leave you alone


You might be a Cuban if:

-you prefer American cigarrettes to Cuban cigars
-to refer to the Cuban missile crisis as the Russian invasion
-you have ever tried to swim to the United States
-you are an excellent source of second hand Russian military equipment
-you refer to Cuban cigars as smokes

You might be from Mexico if:

-everyone from your family that can run, jump or swim is across the border
-you call Europeans gringos
-you complain that the Terminator does not speak his Spanish correctly
-you visit California and come back with a new driver's license
-the United States Government has ever sent you on a free trip to Mexico
 
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Haha... I'm 1/2 Filipino, and I swear, some of my family is like that... I've only been to the Phillipines when I was 2, so I don't see them much. That half of the family creeps me out sometimes... not to mention that I have cousins with the weirdest invented names...

you smile/grin a lot even for no reason,
Whoa. That describes about all of my aunts and uncles on that side...... lol
 
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